My Son's Relationship Advice

"That little youngster," He is hopeless. A difficult draw for him.

When I speak to others about our kid, the only male out of our five children, I often hear comments like these. surrounded by a baby sister and three older sisters. I have no doubt that their objectives are good, but the way they convey their message needs work.

One of the biggest pleasures in our life is our five-year-old kid, who is developing perfectly well. I'd like to believe that he does have a chance, contrary to what he hears from outsiders—a fantastic opportunity, in fact. The youngster who wore a baseball cap and athletic attire all the time a few short years ago was one who only concerned about gathering sticks and digging for worms. It will change completely in a few more short years.

As your father, I find it difficult to comprehend that you will begin considering dating in a few more short years from now. I make the joke that you can't date until you become 30, but I'm sure that won't be the case in reality.

In retrospect, there are fifteen things I wish I had known about dating. Hopefully some of these will be useful to you while you travel. Son, fasten your seatbelt; the journey will be enjoyable.

1. Good folks can triumph.

You'll start to hear—and maybe even believe—that you have to be vicious to succeed in life, which is unfortunate. Not you. At the end of the day, all women, regardless of their age, want to feel loved and secure. Being mean to them won't provide them that.

2. Initially, be a buddy.

My wish for you once you begin dating is that you will become her friend before you become her boyfriend. You're not aware of it yet, but the feelings will be strong and you'll be prepared to jump right in. That's typical, but don't move too quickly. Create a friendship beforehand; it will be useful after you are married. Although the intense feelings of love may blaze brightly at first, the flame of friendship in marriage endures.

3. Traditional methods continue to be effective.

There are a ton of contemporary theories about how dating should go, but the conventional wisdom of being a guy who respects and loves a woman endures (and opening a door for her is always classy, no matter how independent she is). I can guarantee that even if it isn't flashy or fashionable, it will win her heart.

4. Accept that your heart will shatter.

It's likely that one of your relationships will end with you feeling as if your heart has been torn in two. You'll feel more remorse than joy and more questions than solutions. When this occurs, the world will attempt to convince you that you should bury those shattered bits well under the surface. down where no one will ever again see or hear of them. It will instruct you to advance, ascend, and go. However, avoiding it won't help you mend a shattered heart. Direct your weight into it. Ask the difficult questions, cry the ugly tears (regardless of what other people think), and simply keep in mind that, as corny as it may seem, things will get better in time.

5. Talk instead of texting.

Technology is wonderful because it gives us the ability to study, accomplish, and be more. However, there is always a cost. Kids your age communicate far more via texts, snaps, and tweets than they do through face-to-face interactions. Be the man who buys a lady a Coke while leaving his phone in the vehicle. Or the man who puts down the laptop and instead meets her eyes. You'll become noticeable more quickly than you think.

6. Never blow your horn at her.

It could be old-school behavior rearing its head once again, but it won't go well if I find out you honked from a girl's driveway as you were picking her up for a date. Ask her parents if she's ready to be picked up after turning off your vehicle and putting your butt up to the door. Walk her back to her door at the conclusion of the evening and tell her you had a great time.

7. Discover more about her than simply her appearance.

Physical beauty is fantastic, but remember, it's just temporary. In addition, there is always someone more attractive, even if you discover the most gorgeous female in the world. Learn to be interested by who she is, her behavior, her interests, and her aspirations. More important than her bra size or the number of heads she turns in class are all of them.

8. She is gorgeous, not hot.

Please refrain from calling your girlfriend "hot," even if it may have been included in the aforementioned argument. in particular in front of your pals. Each male will claim to have an attractive girlfriend. Tell them how stunning she is. Better yet, compliment her beauty. Show her that she is more than just what she seems to be—you know that.

9. Learn to ask excellent questions.

We all like talking about ourselves, and those who really listen to us make us feel the most connected. Don't stop asking questions and start providing more questions than answers. That says less than he listens.

10. Let her parents know they are in capable hands.

Every woman you date is someone else's daughter, so keep that in mind. While you have probably just known her for a short period of time, they have been with her for years and years. thereby, gain their confidence as well. You do this by keeping your word, being home on time, and treating her as their daughter rather than simply your girlfriend.

11. Create other intimate relationships other from physical ones.

When you genuinely connect with someone, the desire for physical closeness will want to fly off the table like a rocket. There is, of course, a place and a time for it. But don't let it be the cornerstone of your relationship. Find strategies to strengthen your relationships on an emotional, spiritual, and intellectual level. Put forth the effort required here so that your connection has a stronger basis than only physical attraction.

12. Your sisters provide excellent training.

You won't likely have all the knowledge about how to treat a lady, what she likes, and other matters when you begin dating. And don't forget you have four sisters. Four females to love, understand, argue with, and learn from. Let them serve as your sounding board and advisors. And if you're ever unsure, consider how you'd feel if you learned that a man was mistreating your sisters. That will serve as one of your guiding principles, and your marriage will eventually be better as a result of the advice you received from your sisters.

13. Make memories instead than simply buying things.

Yes, every female appreciates a thoughtful present. The usual suspects: chocolate, jewelry, and flowers. I sometimes occasionally do do those things. But giving a gift is not the same as sharing an experience. Instead of exchanging gift receipts, be inventive and create methods to exchange memories. More than the Valentine's Day rose arrangement, she'll remember the time you went on a crazy journey together.

19 Relationship and Dating Lessons

1. Do you want someone to adore you, or do you want someone to adore your possessions?

You're searching for the wrong female if you think a young lady won't want to hang out with you because you don't drive a BMW, Mercedes, or Lexus. She ought to be drawn to you because of your confidence and the way you treat her. Your vehicle is suitable for a college student to drive since you are one. Appreciate having one. You may thus use your own vehicle tonight.

2. Never believe that the cost of love is equivalent to the amount you can afford to offer.

Again, a female is more interested in the "present" than you if she views your degree of love as how many things you can offer her. You're dealing with a gold-digger in the making if she doesn't comprehend the emotional commitment that comes with love, to be perfectly honest. She will run out of money just like the money. So, run.

3. Look for someone with whom you can have a discussion.

Is she intriguing, and are you able to address more complex issues? Are you having one-sided conversations? A crucial component of every relationship is the ability to conduct in-depth conversations.

4. Look for someone with whom you connect.

Find activities that both of you like. Your connection will be strengthened, and you'll be able to do more things together.

5. Diverse hobbies are a good thing.

Even while having activities you can do together is crucial, it's also important for each of you to have a unique hobby or interest. You can maintain interest by giving yourself and her some room to do what you both like.

6. Look for someone who adheres to the same principles and ideals as you do.

There will be a lot of tension if one side is overly conservative and the other is too liberal. Do you have the same opinions on family, religion, etc.? As you grow to know one another, these topics will become increasingly crucial and might ultimately make or ruin a relationship.

7. Look for someone who shares your belief in the possibility of realizing your ambitions.

Be supportive of one another. Encourage and support one another as they strive to improve.

8. Seek for a partner who switches off as the relationship's leader.

You are searching for a long-term companion, not a boss or someone who continually demands that you fulfill their wants before their own.

You may obtain a free booklet with my marital tips.

It's crucial for you to yield when it's suitable. Find a person who appreciates compromise.

9. Avoid attempting to alter one another.

You won't go anywhere except contempt.

10. Avoid upsetting your buddies.

Don't let her make you or your buddies feel uncomfortable with their friends. While sharing pals is enjoyable, maintaining your friendships and being able to hang out with the men are as vital. She is in the same boat. She need some girl time with her pals.

11. Avoid dating someone who is very possessive.

Someone wanting you all to themselves could sound wonderful at first, but with time, this behavior might become poisonous and hazardous to your relationship and your wellbeing.

12. Be respectful to females and make sure they are respectful to you.

No means no, and it is true for your level of comfort as well. Remind a female displaying excessive aggression that "no means no" and that here is a place where equal rights matter. Make sure you treat women with respect and on an equal basis in your relationship. Respect her for who she is.

13. Never let a young lady violate her morals when she is drunk.

When someone chooses to be "more than friends," you want them to do it with clarity of mind and heart. Keep her from having any regrets when she gets sober.

14. Love is not always indicated by raging hormones.

Get your hormones under control. They may impair your judgment and cause you to make poor choices. Keep in mind that passion and love are two distinct species.

15. Constantly take precautions.

You need to look after for yourself until you're ready to have a family.

16. Pay attention when you genuinely like a female.

Pay attention to her interests and hobbies as well as the little details that make up her personality. Keep in mind these details since you'll need them later on when you want to do something special for her.

17. It's crucial to maintain your appearance and your home.

Girls don't like slobs, and if your home looks like a bomb or a scientific experiment went off, they won't want to spend much time there.

18. Show dignity and good manners.

Always be a gentleman, be courteous at the table, and always open doors.

19. I won't let you use my vehicle for the night until you find a female who accepts you for who you are and treat her like a queen.

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