"LIFE OF A LITTLE GIRL"

LIFE OF A LITTLE GIRL

ALL GROWN UP NOW

I shall call this little girl Lujuana. She has curly dark hair. She is only ten years old. She has a light olive complexion.

Lujuana grew up before she was ready to quit climbing trees & hanging out with the boys in the neighborhood.

This is a story about a beautiful little girl who began her womanly monthly regurgitation of toxic chemicals and expelling of unfertilized eggs at 10 years old. The day she began her womanhood was a day of surprise and love. She was visiting her grandma who was her BFF.

Lujuana cried not because she was becoming a woman at ten years old but that her mom said she could not hang out with her little boys nor climb trees or play with mud pies. The decade was the summer of 1960. The atmosphere was still from the 50s and the cold war with Russia. Girls still had to be ladies and walk the line of submission. Lujuana was very inquisitive and did not take kindly to her uncle who told her kids were to be seen and not heard.

After her second womanly month of her new bodily function, she was more adjusted to her new body function. Her parents taught her about the ‘birds and the bees to educate her about why this was happening to her.

The time came for school to start. Lujuana was in the 5th grade as her birthday was late in the school year, so she was always a year behind, so it seemed to her young brain. She told her classmates about her womanly condition when they were in physical education. Her classmates told her she was weird and to not talk about that because the subject was taboo in their families.

Lujuana had developed boobs and a ‘booty. She was rather curvy. The other girls were straight and still babies to their family. Lujuana would go home to her mom and cry. She was sad. The other girls & boys called her “coke bottle”. Lujuana was 5’2”, 110 pounds and developed.

Her grades began to fall. Math was easy for her before she became her monthly periods. The kids bullied her everyday at school. She would eat alone in the school cafeteria. Everyday was the same.

Her parents helped her with her studies to encourage her to bring her grades up. Lujuana was depressed everyday & night. She had nightmare dreams of walking into school naked and all the kids were pointing at her and laughing, “Coke bottled Lu, do you squirt out fizzy coke foam?" Then they would laugh. This happened everyday.

Lujuana played the piano and wrote music after school. She played the blues songs of Lead Belly and Bessie Smith. The blues music was an expression of her pain.

Remember this was the early 60s. Women still had minimal career choices. She wanted to be a writer or star. Her fantasies and music took her into another world far apart from the small minded bullies. Lujuana spent hours playing the piano for many years. At 17 she would close her door and turn on the Stones, Bob Dylan, and all the other rock singers. She would write for hours. She was in her own room of dreams. The décor was so dreamy and psychedelic. She had a bright orange shag carpet with ocean blue walls. A Spanish matador fighting a bull was over her bed. On the other walls were clowns and musicians’ posters. Dreams became a reality as she wrote down prose and poetry and ideas onto her long yellow notebook paper.

“In my world of music notes and expression, taking care of business not contending with games that people play!” She said out loud as “Like A Rolling Stone” vinyl record played on her blue and white stereo record player.

At 19 she began her college years. She was not in a sorority nor wanted to be in one. She finally got away from those boring other years. Her journey would begin as a metamorphosis into her 20s and beyond. She was so overwhelmed about the 70s and the new age of women could be who they wanted to be, a doctor, a lawyer etc. So, she chose medicine and journalism. However, she took every course available except typing and traditional used to be careers for women.

She excelled in all her choices. At that time the educational system was expressing people to be flexible in their choices of careers. Lujuana was so happy and continued her adventures in the dream world of her books, reading and writing.

Facing another decade of living she looks out on the ocean at age 50. “Wow, I have had so much fun working in Hollywood in film production, meeting people. Another decade in 2000.” She said out loud to herself. She has many more lessons to learn in this lifetime. “So many men to meet, so many papers to write.” She thinks as she stares out at Santa Monica Beach.

There was a girl

In this world

Of dreams who twirl

Around the dance floor

And party and film

The boys in the band

In the land

Of Hollywood in LA

To sway

To the beat

In the heat

Of the night

She now sees beyond

The world of dreams

And schemes

Of people she loved

And hugged

And old friends and all

She had a ball

She still had her dreams

Some came true

So, she pursed more dreams

Away from the schemes

Of other humans

As she would sit in her computer chair

As her long black hair

Hangs over the back of the chair

While she lays back staring

At the computer screen

No scheme

Just writing, smiling

More decades to expand

All the while

As she cares

Where

She goes

Where she strays

Across the roads

Of choices to take

In the wake

That she is older now

Too many men

Too many wrongdoing ones gone

So long.

She looks around her room as types away on her Lenovo laptop.

For what

To be alone to think about her life

As continues as an older woman

Of strife

Of joy, pain, happy times

As the clouds go away

The sun shines so close and so far, way

Surrounding her body

The bells chime

The music blares out of Alexa

LIFE IS GOOD!

A gypsy soul lives!

Written by

VICKI LAWANA TRUSSELLI

JUNE 4, 2024

“‘JUST CHILLINGTO THE BEAT TODAY!”

“SO, THE LITTLE GIRL SURVIVED HER 10-YEAR-OLD ISSUE. GUESS SHE HAS LEARNED PEOPLE CAN EVERYTHING ABOUT A PERSON FROM BIRTH TO DEATH. NOW ALL THOSE ARROWS AND EVIL EYES CAN GLARE BACK AT THEIR OWN BULLY SELVES. WHAT LUJUANA HAS LEARNED IS ALL OF WHAT THEY HAD TO SAY ABOUT HER ONLY SHOWED THEIR OWN VACANT LIFE. THEIR EMPTY SOULS, THEIR OWN WOES, AND ESPECIALLY THEIR WEAKNESS OF EXPLOITING OTHERS TO COVER UP THEIR OWN INFERIORITY COMPLEX.”