Journal Entry: Sun. May 22nd 2022

Sunday, May 22 2022

I wake. Shelby goes to brunch, and I brew a Crowded Barrel Coffee Co. EleaNOIR Barrel-Rested Coffee in my Mustache Mug.

I FaceTime my parents.

I toast an English Muffin in our new, four-slotted toaster, and spread on some veganaise. I plop some spinach down on that thing; then I place a juicy tomato slice and then a Peppered Tofurkey slice. I slide on some vegan CHAO Tofu Cheese. Then I load it up with a fuckton of hot sauce. And Voila. A Vegan sandwich so veganly.

I feast.

But I don't stop there. I eat a banana, a mandarin orange, and a handful of raw almonds. As I feast I watch an episode of The Whiskey Vault on YouTube.

I do the dishes while listening to Ben Kweller's, 'Go Fly a Kite.'

I shower with Bourbon, 2-n-1, Head and Shoulders, Shampoo/Conditioner. I use a bar of soap called Man Bar that smells like Taco Bell's meat seasoning. Then I lather myself with Duke Cannon Buffalo Trace Bourbon Soap and rinse. I then smother myself with body wash: Duke Canon THICK Bourbon Bodywash. After rinsing I rinse my hair. Then I use my Duke Cannon Buffalo Trace Bourbon Plant-Based Beard Wash. I rinse. I dry and comb my red beard with its elegant white streaks.

I put on Axe Apollo Fresh Stick, because they were out of Phoenix.

I heat filtered, water to 170 Degrees Fahrenheit in my black, Fellow EKG Gooseneck Kettle and steep two teaspoons of Sencha Fancy Green Tea for three minutes in my Mike Wazowski mug. I purchased the tea at The Tea Table online. I highly recommend them.

I sip on tea, journal, and post on Vocal. I post the past two to three weeks' work on Patreon for my Patrons. I post two indefinable sonnets, two episodes of Poetry Dram, and three more chapters of the novel The Rise and Crumble of The Gingerbread Man.

I put on Big Bourbon Beard Balm and Bourbon Cologne Balm.

I drink a smoothie and eat carrots and raw almonds.

I brush my teeth and brew a Crowded Barrel Coffee Co. EleaNOIR Barrel-Rested Coffee in my Z's Divine Espresso mug.

I journal, and Shelby comes home. I pour a glencairn of Wild Turkey 101 Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey.

We watch a couple episodes of Mythic Quest on Apple TV+ and then Barry on HBO Max.

I eat oatmeal with protein powder, cinnamon, agave, blueberries, and peanut butter.

I pour another glencairn of Wild Turkey 101.

Then we watch two episodes of Saturday Night Live on Hulu. The episode with Selina Gomez was one of the worst I've seen in a long time. I can't believe Aidy Bryant is leaving. That's a huge loss for Saturday Night Live.

I have two mimosas. We finish off the prosecco. Still have OJ though.

Then Shelby makes vegan Sausages, and I feast on two with hot sauce, mustard, and CHAO vegan cheese.

I shower with Bourbon, 2-n-1, Head and Shoulders, Shampoo/Conditioner. I use a bar of soap called Man Bar that smells like Taco Bell's meat seasoning. Then I lather myself with Duke Cannon Buffalo Trace Bourbon Soap and rinse. I then smother myself with body wash: Duke Canon THICK Bourbon Bodywash. After rinsing I rinse my hair. Then I use my Duke Cannon Buffalo Trace Bourbon Plant-Based Beard Wash. I rinse. I dry and comb my red beard with its elegant white streaks.

I put on Axe Apollo Fresh Stick, because they were out of Phoenix.

And then I go to bed.

And that's it.

That's my day.

That's Sunday, May 22nd 2022