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How To Start Over After a Divorce or Long Term Relationship!

Starting Over Isn’t So Bad

By Bella LovePublished 4 years ago 3 min read
How To Start Over After a Divorce or Long Term Relationship!
Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

WHO THE FUCK WANTS TO START ALL OVER AGAIN?!?! Well sometimes things don’t go as planned AND the person you’ve been with either turns out to be a piece of shit or you grew apart.

Whatever the reason for the end of your relationship, the most important point is it’s over. Now what do you do? First things first remove any and all things that will remind you of this person! Old pictures, clothing, maybe even gifts. If you’re still very sensitive about the break maybe keeping things that remind you of them isn’t a good idea to keep.

A lot of times we go through a few phases after a breakup. The denial phase, the can’t stop crying and just want you to call me phase and the fuck it I’m over it phase.

The goal is to get to the FUCK IT IM OVER IT PHASE! The next thing you wanna do is remove them from your social media platforms. Nothing is more sad then stalking your Ex’s page to see how their life is going, it might make you feel worse. Don’t go looking for updates about them. Worry about healing yourself and being happy again.

Next, KEEP YOURSELF BUSY! Do not and I mean do not lock yourself away feeling sorry for yourself. Go to the gym, hang out with some friends you haven’t seen in a while, work on a business, if you have kids spend healthy quality time with them. The busier you are the less you think about your Ex.

Now when it comes to dating, you have to think about how comfortable you are with new people. Think about how you want to meet new people. Some people have their friends set them up on blind dates, some use dating apps. Now I suggest going out with some of your closest friends and having them invite someone they think you may vibe with.

You are not looking for the love of your life right now. You’re just looking to get back on the dating scene and have a good time. PLEASE DO NOT BREAK PEOPLE DOWN BY CONPARING THEM TO YOUR EX. Yes, you are suppose to use your last situation as a learning experience but not every one will have the same qualities or be like your Ex and to be honest, it didn’t workout for a reason so keep your mind open.

If you’re and Extrovert, get your confidence back by going to places by yourself. Being social, meeting new people. If you’re an introvert, try online dating. Choose who you talk to when you talk to them but PLEASE BE CAREFUL. Do not meet up with random people alone or without some sort of protection. If you wanna meet someone from your online dating make sure you have a few friends come along to make sure things go smooth.

START OFF WITH BEING FRIENDS AND BE HONEST ABOUT WHO YOU ARE AND WHAT YOU WANT! Now I’m not telling you to be an open book to a random stranger. Being just friends with a person allows you to continue to heal and see who this person really is. People tend to show their true colors as just friends verses dating.

You want to be honest because you don’t want to lead someone on. Just because you’re heart was broken doesn’t mean you hurt someone else. If you just want sex and nothing more say that. If you want to be just friends because you’re not ready for a relationship or anything physical then say that. Letting someone know what you’re about from the jump cancels out any bullshit.

Sometimes it may feel like you’ll never love again. Ruin relationships can make you feel like you never wanna be in another one. Trust me when I say YOU DESERVE TO BE LOVED THE WAY YOU LOVE OTHERS. After any breakup the goal should always be to be happy again. For you to not yearn for that person any more and if you’re ready, to be able to completely love someone else again.

LIVE LAUGH LOVE. BE GOOD TO YOURSELF AND YOUR BODY.

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About the Creator

Bella Love

I’m just head to talk a little bit and use this as creative space.

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    Bella LoveWritten by Bella Love

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