How To Build Excellent Email Etiquette

Writing formal emails becomes a challenge when our minds hunt in hunger for the best words to use. When it comes to enquiring and expressing, it is important to craft words of value. What I mean is every word should work in a unique way to create positive meanings for the reader. A writer and speaker’s ability to use the right word at the right time marks confidence and professionalism.

Let me share five lessons I learned about email etiquette.

Practice Simplicity

Cluttered words in an email simply lead to confusion. I have come across unpleasant situations where cluttered words raised more “ego driven questions” and contributed to fresh arguments.

Good writing isn’t always about using more words to explain; it is the ability to be simple, clear, and concise. Removing unnecessary words keeps my emails simple, brief and clean. It limits confusions and improves my communications.

I prefer using familiar words in my writing. The complex ones caused recipients to rest their heads on dictionaries, raise confusions and procrastinated responses; these indirectly dragged my work efficiency as well. Some recipients even came back with more questions to gain a release from chains of complexity.

Practice Purposeful Questioning

It’s good to ask questions as questions clear doubts and enhance understanding. But I keep in mind that I shouldn’t transform into a “questioning machine” that questions every statement. A storming series of questions annoys recipients and jeopardizes work efficiency.

Excessive questioning might describe five kinds of situations:

1.) The questioner has lots of free time.

2.) Questioner lacks confidence in taking decisions.

3.) Questioner is releasing passive moods in the form of questions.

4.) Questioner is working hard to appear intelligent and gain validation.

5.) Questioner wants to gratify their mind's needs of curiosity, and they might be unaware about the purpose behind their own questions.

I developed a conscious practice of asking only purposeful questions. I usually keep my questions simple and clear in emails. If I have more questions, I would call the person and talk.

Watch The Emotions

It is important to be watchful over negative emotions when writing emails. Clouded emotions lead to unclear thinking. Unclear thinking causes poor written communications.

I practice being emotionally distant when reading and responding to unfriendly emails. I take a break, relax and watch my breath. Watching my breath helps me to bring my mind to the present moment of calmness. Being calm helps me to craft emails with clear responses.

Never Try To Demotivate or Embarrass Someone — using the ‘reply all button or carbon copy method.’

I learned not to express aggression and frustration to someone and make everyone see it. This action shows signs of poor emotional and empathetic intelligence. It reflects power control and domination.

I have come across appalling leaders who do this with subtle moves. For example, some wrap their negative comments in “a package of pseudo concerns” and explode them mercilessly on a worker’s inbox. And there are others who become “active questioning machines” to aim the worker’s competency and skills.

These actions cause mental and emotional harm to the recipient. It makes the recipient feel uncomfortable. It even breaks trust and strains working relationships. No matter how well these rude and condescending words are masked, a sharp reader will sense easily the malicious intent behind those words.

These actions don’t create progressive changes or productive outcomes. They only leave behind pains and sufferings.

Focus On Solutions

When I communicate, I keep my mind focused on creating solutions. This helps me to remain alert and watchful over ideas and methods that improve, stagnate or aggravate a situation. For example, some communications begin for the purpose of finding solutions but end up causing more problems.

I learned that simplicity works best when it comes to finding solutions. However, to arrive to simplicity, the first step is to embrace complexity. I usually take some time to pay attention and comprehend a problem clearly. I tell myself that simple solutions are merged inside complex challenges.

When encountering problems in any communications, I study the problem first. Studying the problem helps us with the effective use of words to improve communications and find solutions.

Final Words

I learned that problems in communications might happen due to unhealed emotions and personal struggles. In some situations, email communications become ‘ventilation points’ to release emotions.

It is important to practice the art of using words that are polite and pleasant. To put it simply, practice writing in a way that encourages the recipient to trust, assist and work in ease with us.

We can develop the skill of rolling with resistance from passive aggressive and impolite comments. This skill is the ability to respond to vacuous communications without releasing ungrounded emotions.

It is good to train our minds to taste bitter words and remain ready to conquer tough situations. We practice learning from such situations and level up our skills to handle situations better. The qualities that support us in achieving an excellent etiquette are calmness, empathy and intelligence.

These lessons taught me to write emails in a way that empowers and encourages my working partners. Emails and any forms of written communications become great constructive tools if we work together to remove the destructive words. Good speaking and writing skills are bridges to human connections. It’s our responsibility to keep these bridges strong and stable.

Thank you for reading my insights.