How I Learned From Damaging Friendships

Moving to a new country is not easy. It can be exciting, challenging, rewarding, but also lonely and stressful. You have to adapt to a different culture, language, lifestyle, and environment. You have to leave behind your familiar surroundings, your family, your friends, and your comfort zone.

But sometimes, moving to a new country can also be a blessing in disguise. It can be an opportunity to start fresh, to reinvent yourself, to grow as a person, and to make new friends. It can also be a chance to escape from damaging friendships that were holding you back, draining your energy, and hurting your self-esteem.

That's what happened to me when I moved (at least on a part-time basis) to Cambodia years ago. I had been living in the US for most of my life, but I always felt restless and unhappy. I wanted to see the world, to experience different cultures, to learn new things. I also wanted to get away from some toxic friends who were making my life miserable. They were the kind of friends who would always criticize me, judge me, gossip about me, and put me down. They would never support me, encourage me, or celebrate my achievements. They would always make me feel guilty, ashamed, or inadequate. They would always take advantage of me, manipulate me, or betray me.

I don't know why I stayed friends with them for so long. Maybe it was because I was afraid of being alone, or because I didn't think I deserved better. Maybe it was because I was used to their abuse, or because I hoped they would change. Maybe it was because I didn't know how to end the friendship, or because I felt sorry for them. But whatever the reason was, it was not worth it. They were not real friends. They were damaging my mental health, my self-confidence, and my happiness. They were preventing me from living my full potential, from pursuing my dreams, from being myself.

So when I got the opportunity to move to Cambodia, I didn't hesitate. I packed my bags, bought a one-way ticket, and said goodbye to my old life. I didn't tell my toxic friends where I was going or why. I just cut off all contact with them. I stopped answering them on social media, deleted their numbers from my phone, and ignored their messages and calls.

It was hard at first. I felt guilty, sad, angry, and confused. I wondered if I had made a mistake, if I had been too harsh, if I had lost something valuable. But as time went by, I realized that it was the best decision I ever made. I felt free, relieved, happy, and proud. I realized that I had gained something priceless: myself.

Moving to Cambodia was a life-changing experience for me. It opened my eyes to a whole new world of possibilities. It challenged me to step out of my comfort zone and try new things. It taught me to appreciate the beauty and diversity of life. It enriched me with knowledge and wisdom.

But most importantly, it helped me make new friends who were genuine, supportive, kind, and fun. They were the kind of friends who would always listen to me, understand me, respect me, and accept me. They would always inspire me, motivate me, or cheer me up. They would always be there for me, help me out or stand up for me. They were the kind of friends who made me feel good about myself, who made me laugh until my stomach hurt, who made me forget about my worries and problems. They were the kind of friends who made my life better.

I don't regret moving to Cambodia or leaving behind my toxic friends. In fact, I'm grateful for both experiences. They taught me valuable lessons about friendship and about myself. They taught me that sometimes you have to let go of the people who are hurting you in order to find the people who are healing you. They taught me that sometimes you have to escape from damaging friendships in order to discover true friendships.

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Original story (created by me) published on Medium.com. Any changes and/or updates that have been added on Vocal.media are for content consumption purposes.

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