Being a Carer for my Boyfriend

Hi everyone,

This blog I will be explaining about how I am my boyfriends Carer and how I help him on a daily basis.

My partner of 5 years for a while now has been suffering with pains in his joints and lower back pains. He went to see a doctor to get tested for a certain gene that runs in his family. He found out that he has Axial Spondyloarthritis, which is a rare form of Arthritis that runs in his family.

(Background on AS) Axial Spondyloarthritis (axial SpA) is an inflammatory arthritis where the main symptom is back pain. Mason has the Non-radiographic axial spondyloarthritis.

Where x-ray changes are not present but inflammation is visible on MRI or you have symptoms.

Around 7 in 10 people with non-radiographic axial spondyloarthritis have visible inflammation in the sacroiliac joints or the spine when an MRI of the back is carried out. Around 3 in 10 may not have any inflammation visible on MRI despite symptoms of back pain. Some may never go on to develop visible inflammation on MRI. The reasons for this are still not well understood but may be due to the sensitivity of MRI.

Some of the symptons of Axial Spondyloarthritis are:

- Slow or gradual onset of back pain and stiffness over weeks or months, rather than hours or days

- Early-morning stiffness and pain, wearing off or reducing during the day with exercise

- Persistence for more than 3 months (as opposed to coming on in short attacks)

- Feeling better after exercise and worse after rest

- Weight loss, especially in the early stages

- Fatigue or tiredness

- Feeling feverish and experiencing night sweats

His Granddad, Auntie, Uncle and Second Cousin has this also. It causes him pain in his knees, hips, lower back, shoulder and occasionally in his ribs. He works full time hours at the moment which is causing him more pain because he works in retail. He is constantly on his feet which causes him lower back pain and shoulder pain.

I have to help him in and out of the shower daily, if I am around I help him get out of bed because he finds it hard to get up without support. I help him change when he has flare ups, this is normally to the point where he cannot bend down to put certain clothing items on.

There are some days where he can be bed bound and he cannot get out of bed. So during these days I have to support him to get up and move his joints to ensure he gets the exercise he needs. He needs to keep his joints moving but he finds this difficult due to this type of Arthritis.

He is on a lot of medication, which at this current moment in time are not working to the affect that he needs them to work. He has another appointment to see if he can change the dosage or type of medication he is currently on. He has also being referred hydrotherapy and physiotherapy to help with the pain and to be able to stretch his joints and movement in his muscles. He uses a walking stick which helps him when he is out and about in the general public.

When he does get really bad, there have been times where I have also had to cook his meals for him. I've had to ensure that before I go to work that he has meals cooked and sometimes in reach so that he is able to eat during the day.

There have been times where he has had to take time off of work due to him not being able to move properly or him being in so much pain that he can physically move properly. This has affected his mental health as well, he has anxiety and depression, which when he gets a flare up of his physical health it also affects his mental health at lot more than it should.

I am happy to do this because he has supported me in my time of need so why would I not be there for when he needs me.

I hope you are all doing well.

- Lauren :)