Art of Being Myself

“Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.” (Wilde, 2021. Goodreads) Growing up, learning to be myself and manage my anxieties and emotions has always played an enormous role in my life; I’m constantly on the lookout of bettering myself and my health. I feel like I resonate tremendously with the Ted Talk video, “The Art of Being Yourself” by Caroline McHugh, because even today, I still struggle with understanding and knowing the genuine me. Finding that I am endlessly searching for who I am, who I want to be and what I want to do, which can be grueling for my body and soul. In the video Caroline describes “when you look in a regular mirror, you look for reassurance, you look for reassurance that you’re beautiful,” but when you look in the “true mirror”, she illuminates the idea that I need to stop looking at myself and start looking for myself (McHugh, 2013). Likewise, learning about basic human needs, and wellness in healthcare intrigued my interest for similar reasons. Not just for myself, but for those who are around me too. I sincerely believe healthy atmospheres, healthy bodies and healthy minds are what make up a good healthy society, or in this case, a healthy business for someone who works in healthcare; as well as the health of their clients and patients that they deal with everyday. We need our own health and wellness in check if we want to succeed, but we also need this type of atmosphere if we want our relationships to succeed with others and remain positive.

In healthcare it is idyllic to manage your anxieties and stressors, even though some stressors can be “good”, such as the ones that help you get motivated, but most of the time they can take a major toll on your psyche. What should we all do to cope with these feelings of ourselves and others? “We need to have a good understanding of what makes people behave the way they do. Insight into human behavior is definitely a "need to know" for Health Administrative Assistants,” (Bow Valley College, 2014) and taking care of our own health and wellness is just as important as the clients we tend to. We need to have an understanding of other people’s values as well; our own beliefs shouldn’t reflect on someone else because their beliefs don’t reflect with our own. Their needs, problems and emotions are what makes them their own person and should be validated as such. “A need is something that an individual must have in order to survive or function within limits that our society calls normal.” (Bow Valley College, 2014, D2L), and this is one of the many reasons that can make people behave the way they do. For example, in Maslow’s Hierarchy of Basic Needs (Bow Valley, 2014) we have primary needs such as breathing, eating, water, rest, shelter, etc. which are extremely important for our survival, but we also have secondary needs, such as safety, love, self-actualization and so on. These feelings are needed in order to feel a sense of belonging, to feel safe, to feel like we are a part of society that cares. If we don’t have these needs met, we can become hostile towards people and our environment, we can become ill or even go as far as having suicidal tendencies.

For myself, it is an extreme battle dealing with social anxiety, it has set me far back from the life I wish for and deserve. Especially when I am trying to become a veterinarian, dealing with people is a part of everyday life, particularly in a hospital setting, so to admit that I struggle with mental disabilities and “approval addiction, the need to be liked, the need for approbation,” (McHugh, 2013) has been a huge step forward in also realizing that I don’t need everyone’s approval to be who I am, I don’t need someone’s approval or judgements to be a veterinarian when I know I am amazing with animals and that they are my own passion. I become quiet around people and that makes them think I am being ignorant, or uncaring, or that I don’t have enough confidence to do my job. In all reality, that bruises me, and I’m tired of trying to better myself for other people’s views and beliefs when I know for a fact, I am good enough, despite my anxieties. Since a young age, I’ve had “thoughts” and these thoughts have resulted in making me quite ill, depression has many symptoms, and they aren’t always clear to people. I think learning these topics has shed some light that not everyone is out to get me, and I am not the only one struggling. On another note, I’ve always been very empathic, especially towards animals, so I am always putting others needs before my own, which like mentioned can take toll on someone’s psyche, we need to have that work/life balance.

The video gave me a lot of perspective; I absolutely agree with everything Caroline McHugh said, especially when she stated, “most of us don’t take up the space that was intended for us. We take up the wee space around our toes”. We live in a vast world, and an even vaster universe, why wouldn’t I want to shine my light as bright as any star in the galaxy? Why am I limiting myself to just the space around my toes? Our planet may be vast, but it is not always pleasant, people will break our spirit, but it is up to us to define what that really means. She goes on to show a video of a performer named Jill Scott, who proceeds to say as another performer is walking off the stage, “we all have our own thing, that’s the magic of it. and everybody comes with their own sense of strength and their own queendom. Mine could never compare to hers, and hers could never compare to mine.” (Jill Scott) These words spoke deeply to me; I adore someone who can shine their light that bright and speak so highly of someone else while doing so. We need this energy in the world, and we need this energy in healthcare because it helps people heal.

A challenging concept is knowing who you are, but “you should just be yourself... Because when you be yourself, you’re fabulous,” (McHugh, 2013) and thus, you make the world a brighter and easier to place be in. My beliefs weren’t necessarily challenged, but the topic has definitely opened my eyes about who I am and who others are. Not one person is the same, and that’s okay, we are all just trying to stay healthy and survive. We’re in this world together whether we like it or not and we need to realize that everyone has their own beliefs and values, and we need to accept that. Whether we are sick or if we are healthy as can be, we need to be good neighbours, we need to help and love one another, and I truly believe that is the main goal of being able to work in health care.