Among lessons of war: Gratitude

I have always been a coffee person; I start my day by grinding coffee beans and getting

my jezve ready. During the last six months, my mornings have consisted of a cup of coffee and

news instead of chocolate. Every morning, I watch and read about my native land I was born and

lived in for most of my life be ruined. Daily, I contact my friends and relatives and breathe freely

when they respond because that means they are alive. My life has changed in the sense of

increased stress, anxiety, and feelings of complete helplessness. On the contrary, the lives of the

people in Ukraine have changed more dramatically.

It has been over six months since the war in Ukraine started. This war began unexpectedly

and took too many lives: the lives of the soldiers and civilians, the lives of adults and children

and the lives of innocent people who were not ready and did not deserve to die. This war caused

horrors and mental breakdowns. Children were forced to watch their parents be tortured and

killed, meanwhile, the parents had to see their homes and towns get destroyed. Even helpless

animals had to pay the price. This war turned brotherly love between two nations into pure

hatred. This war has changed many Ukrainians lives overnight.

I know many people from Kharkiv City, Ukraine because it is my motherland. Since

February of 2022, their lives turned upside down. Many had to leave the country and ended up in

different parts of Europe. For instance, my niece’s apartment was ruined during winter and she

had no choice but to grab her baby girl and get on an overcrowded train. She came to the Czech

Republic and is making it their home for now. Another example is one of my cousins, who I

grew up with. After an explosion in her back yard, she was forced to take her elderly mom and

cat and go to Finland. After being on the road for a week, her mom was exhausted and her cat

got sick. Having always been an animal lover, she used all her savings, which was a few hundred

Euros, and paid for the vet to save their fur baby’s life. My second cousin faced the choice of

taking her daughters out of Ukraine or staying put with her son, who was enlisted and getting

ready to serve in the Army to protect his country. Her elderly mom refused to leave the

homeland. After much consideration, she found herself in a foreign country – Poland. While

staying at strangers homes, she felt guilt about her parent and worried about her son being killed

so she made the uneasy decision to go back home. No reasoning would change her mind. All she

said was “if anything happens to my son, I need to be there.”

Furthermore, after fighting for her life in Mariupol, my dear friend escaped the city

occupied by the Russians. She said there was no electricity, water, or heat. Her life was in

survival mode: running to the river to get water, then boiling it outside on the fire, sharing the

rest of the remaining food among the neighbors, and risking her life delivering food to those who

could not ambulate. On top of that, running to the basement or falling flat on the ground with

every air raid alert became their normal routine. After deciding to risk her life, she escaped. She

survived while many others were not as lucky. My friend was feeding two older ladies. They

were not able to leave the high-rise building and simply waited for a miracle to happen or for

death to come; death from a bomb or starvation. This experience will be never forgotten by my

friend and will never leave her the same person as she was before the war.

Some have not even attempted to leave. My brother and I talk often and he updates me on

their current situation in Kharkiv. At first, he used to describe in more detail how many air raids

they had, the severity of shelling, and the fear he used to experience. However, it seems that he

has gotten numb or has been trying to enjoy his life despite the continuous distractions and

surrounding destructions. Now, he casually tells me that “it is loud here.” This means that the air

raids and the explosions are happening fairly close. Once, he said that something exploded in the

neighboring region, about a couple of miles from his house. I was speechless and selfishly happy

that it was not his yard.

After six months, the list of similar stories can go on. The common denominator for all is

the enormous challenge every person has encountered. The distress comes from the fear of being

killed, losing stability in the blink of an eye, making life altering decisions, or moving to an

unknown place. Moving to another country as a refugee means living outside of a stadium or

sharing a room packed with strangers until you can be placed somewhere permanently. As well

as, struggling to find consistent income and not knowing how much longer this welcoming

country can support you, all while continuing to witness the missiles dismantle your home.

As a result, this bloodshed war thought me to adjust my outlook on life and re-evaluate

my priorities. The peaceful sky has a different meaning now. Even when there are dark grey

clouds above my head, the sky is still the most beautiful. The things we often complain about

seem silly in comparison to the circumstances of those in Ukraine. This horrendous war is a

reminder that any stability and security can be gone overnight. On the contrary, holding on to a

peaceful mind and focusing on gratitude is the privilege that no one can take from us.