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7 Ways To Be a Better Partner

Relationships take work, but the risk is worth the reward.

By Candice GalekPublished 3 years ago 3 min read
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Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

Nobody wants to be in a crappy relationship, and there's no shortage of ways to begin to improve your current relationship. But, you can get started with these tips to get the ball rolling.

Don't make fun of them, complain about them or discuss their faults in their absence.

Let's be honest, okay? You do not want them talking crap about you behind your back so you should not do it to them either. It can take some getting used to but it's worth it in the long run. I tend to be an open book and no topic is off limits, but I have noticed that sometimes I give too many details that might actually be somewhat personal so I have reeled that behavior back.

Don't expect them to read your mind. Tell them what you need from them.

If you are hoping for change to occur the best way to make that happen is by speaking your mind. Don't be aggressive or confrontational about it, but let your desires be known. Try this:

"When you _______, I feel _______."

For example, "When you text me in the middle of the day to let me know you're thinking of me, I feel special and happy."

Wording things in this way is straight forward and leaves little room for error.

Take a 10 second pause before you respond in a conflict. Breathe to connect with your highest intention.

A conversation should be like a tennis match. One person speaks while the other listens, considers the information, and then responds. If you're thinking of what you're going to say while the other person is talking then you're not truly listening at all.

By pausing in conversation before responding it allows you to form a cohesive thought and not say something you might otherwise regret.

Stay polite. Say "please" and "thank you" often, even for what may be their responsibilities or chores.

You know what feels good? Feeling appreciated and valued. Do you know what doesn't feel good? Feeling as though you're not appreciated or valued.

Make it safe for them to say: "no" "not now" or "I will not"

The reality is that a relationship is comprised of two individuals, and at times you will have differing feelings or needs. If you want to go out with friends but your partner isn't feeling well, don't force them into going.

Come to an agreement that suites you both, whether that's one person sitting out or you both staying home for the evening. You know that by forcing them into going they will just be miserable and resent you for not allowing them to rest while they are under the weather. Allow them to feel comfortable enough in the relationship to voice their wants and concerns.

Appreciate them often. Be genuine and specific, "I love how you think about…" or "You have such a soothing voice."

Compliments for women are a dime a dozen and don't tend to hold a lot of weight when coming from someone we don't want them from. But when they come from the person we have a crush on, or love, it's a whole different ball game. Particularly when it's on something deeper than how they look.

Many men don't get complimented very often, but when they do they tend to remember it. Give a genuine heartfelt compliment to a man and you've made a friend for life.

Be a freeing presence in their life. Encourage choices that feel authentic to them. Love them only for who they are, so they become the best versions of themselves.

It's important to be a supporter in their growth throughout life. The goal should never be to remain the same, but to have new experiences and allow them to flourish. Support them in doing things they want to do but are scared of.

I am terrified of heights but recently I went zip-lining over a canyon with my boyfriend. I told him I would only do it if he did, but he didn't know it was my first time. I was terrified and clung to that cable for dear life, but I did it and had so much fun! I was happy that we had done it together and he helped me face my fears.

Remember, all relationships take work if you want them to last. The old saying is true, the grass really is greener where you water it.

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About the Creator

Candice Galek

Miami based entrepreneur turned environmental non-profit founder. Forbes 30 Under 30 Honoree. Inc. Magazine columnist. Always learning.

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