5 Lessons I Learned from Bankruptcy

Three years ago, I quit my job as a brand manager to become a freelance writer. I spent half my first year traveling.

For the next two years, I eked out a living on the meager income I earned from my fledgling freelance writing business, supplemented by savings. It was a struggle and things didn't take off as I would have liked. The money has finally run out for the year.

It was a strange experience - no money (except for a little I did by writing and sitting around doing housework). Strangely, I wasn't as scared as I thought I would be.

I admit it's not easy. I want to make enough money to cover my monthly expenses. Now, I barely keep my head above water.

Yet I felt strangely at peace with it. I do have moments where I feel depressed and exhausted by the constant financial struggle. Then I give myself an inspiring speech and move on.

I knew I needed to make certain decisions about how to move forward with my life. The choice is between continuing to pursue freelancing, finding additional ways to supplement my income, or, and this is my least favorite option, returning to the traditional workforce.

At the same time, when I think about it carefully, like everything in life, there are some lessons to be learned in every situation. I have come to the conclusion that this seemingly bad experience is also a good one. Little or no money can test your character and provide some important lessons and awakenings.

Here are some of mine:

1. We can spend much less money

When I left work, I slashed my fat and cut my expenses. I need a lot less money now than I did in my previous life. The more you acquire something, the more you have to pay for and maintain it.

2. Something always comes up

Just when I wonder how I'm going to make it through another month, somehow something always comes along to help me through. It taught me to live by faith.

Believe it will work, and if you believe in a higher power, he will take care of you. I'm constantly surprised that this happens. It's very encouraging.

3. You find out who your real friends are

I am lucky to have consistent and true friends. They knew I was short of money, but they didn't pull runners. They're still my friends. They're still there for me. Having friends like this is one of the richest blessings in life.

Some of them even helped me along the way (I never asked for any help), paying for my nanny, sending writing or editing work my way, paying for a nice dinner or giving me something nice when out shopping.

I even had a friend give me a month-long trip overseas! It blew my mind. Who would do that?

However, in a world full of shallow people, there are many who will abandon you in your hour of need. No money! - No friends!

These are the friends of the fair weather. - When the weather is good. But when the clouds appear, they are nowhere to be found.

If you find yourself in this situation, be thankful. Everyone you know (including family) is thrown into the sieve, shaken, and the real people are left behind.

The superficial ones fall and flow out of your life. And that's a good thing. Now you know you're surrounded by quality people -- people who deserve to have them in your life.

4. Take what's given

The biggest lesson I learned during this time was to learn to accept what was offered. This was the hardest thing because as a single, independent woman, I made my own way in the world and never asked anyone for help, even in hard times.

Call it pride or independence or both. I feel uncomfortable when someone pays for me. I'm inclined to say no.

I learned to swallow my pride and acceptance. By refusing a gift, financial aid, or favor, you are not only denying yourself a much-needed favor or a lovely gift, but you are denying the giver the pleasure he or she derives from the act of giving and avoiding the love and care they have shown you.

5. Life goes on

Experiencing a bad financial situation can be devastating - losing your job, losing your income, losing your home, losing your possessions, and struggling to put food on the table and pay the bills isn't easy. Unfortunately, life doesn't stop when you run out of money.

Some have lost everything and end up living with relatives, or moving into homeless shelters, or worst-case scenario - living in their cars. The sun still rises, the days still pass, life still goes on.

It was hard and unpleasant, make no mistake.

To get by, maybe they got help from their families, lived on welfare assistance or unemployment, or survived on just one meal a day. But life goes on, one way or another. Eventually, they found a job, a new apartment and got back on their feet.

Parting words

There is no shame in landing in hard times. It can happen to anyone. The thing to remember is that money moves. It's here one day, gone the next.

Again, it can disappear today, but it will disappear tomorrow. The wheel turns. Even the most devastating financial losses can be reversed because money is something you can always get again.

As we struggle financially, the bottom of our world may seem to have exited, but it's important to remember that this, too, will pass. It was a descent on the roller coaster of life, and like any roller coaster, it will rise again.