10 Tips for a Happy and Healthy Relationship

Being in a relationship should add something good to your life, not drain you or cause stress. It takes constant work for you and your partner (or partners) to find happiness together. Here are ten tips on how to maintain a healthy relationship.

1. Make time

I think time management is a classic problem. A relationship needs constant attention and tending to, so making time for your partner is essential. It's also a give-and-take situation, so finding a balance between hobbies, friends, work and your partner is key. Don't make your life all about your partner, but don't let them feel neglected either.

2. Make sure they know your feelings towards them

It feels good to be loved. Let your partner know how you feel about them, so that they never have to question where they stand with you. If your partner knows that you love them, it makes them less likely to feel insecure in the relationship. Do loving and caring gestures for them, and tell them you love them every day.

3. Be honest and transparent

Honesty is one of the most, if not the single most important factor in a relationship. If you don't have trust, you have nothing. Don't be sketchy and toxic, like trying to make your partner worried or jealous. Personally I don't think it should be necessary to have your partner's passwords to social media or to go through their phone to check they're not cheating on you. If you're transparent with your partner, trusting you will be much easier.

4. Be considerate

A crucial way of showing that you care about your partner is to be considerate with them. Listen to their feelings and worries, and be there for them. If you know they are sensitive to certain things, make a point of not exposing them to it. Don't play with their feelings or use their weak points against them. Make it clear to your partner that it's important to you that they are okay. Pay attention to what goes on in their life, and offer help or support, as well as celebrating their achievements.

5. Feel free to do what you want

It's important to continue living your life while in a relationship. Keep focusing on your individual self and do the things you used to do before. You don't need your partner's permission to do things, and you shouldn't feel limited from being in a relationship. Don't lose your personality or individuality because you're no longer single.

6. Appreciate them

Don't take them for granted. Your partner absolutely doesn't have to be with you, they've made the choice to be with you. Show them that you're worth it. Make it clear to your partner that you are glad you're with them, and that you see them. Notice what they do for you, and do things for them as well. And, importantly, thank them for the things they do!

7. Cut them some slack - you probably do annoying things too

Compromise is an important part of a relationship, so choose your battles wisely. You can't complain about every single little annoying thing they do, or ask them to change their behaviour. If there are small things that could be adjusted for mutual benefit, sure, but you are not with someone to mould them into the perfect partner - you find the perfect partner by focusing on and appreciating the good things.

8. Communicate!

I've heard that a common reason for breakups is not talking enough. Your partner might know a lot about you but they can't read your mind. You need to tell them what you want or need from them. How are they supposed to know how you feel if you don't tell them? Don't keep things to yourself and expect them to magically know. If you have an issue, talk about it. Use your words!

9. Be consistent

Your partner deserves your consistency. Keep your promises, stay focused on them, prioritise them, shower them with love and give them the feeling of stability. Let your partner know that they can trust you to stick to your words and stand by them. Be predictable, so that your partner knows what they can expect from you.

10. Put yourself first

In the words of Rick Sanchez, "Always look out for number one". I know a lot of people consider loving another person to mean you put their needs before your own, but I don't agree with that. This is your life, and you can't make another person happy if you're not happy yourself. You need to do what's right for you and fulfil your own needs before taking care of theirs. Of course, I'm not saying for you to be selfish. Show that you care about them and that you want to make them happy, but your own happiness and wellbeing needs to be your number one priority.

Knowing what's right for a relationship isn't always easy, but you'll learn as you go. Listen to your partner, find out what they need and want, and create a balance that makes everyone happy.