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Why Should We Talk About Sex With Our Partner?

by Carol Townend 16 days ago in relationships

Feeling Comfortable With Our Intimate Partners Is Important.

Why Should We Talk About Sex With Our Partner?
Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

There was a time when talking about sex was just as difficult as having sex for me. I was vulnerable, and I had been raped. Therefore any sex talk or action was percieved as disgusting to me. That was until 1998 when I met someone with who things became serious. I had a lot of issues with sex, it scared me and any discussion of it made me feel bad about myself until I finally found the courage to let go. It was only after learning how to let go that I started seeing sex as normal between two partner's who loved each other, and I eventually learned the importance of discussing sex openly with my partner.

When it feels uncomfortable to talk about sex, it can lead to discomfort in the bedroom

Both parties need to understand and be aware of their needs. If we don't talk about what makes us comfortable and what makes us uncomfortable, then sex will be uncomfortable and awkward.

Sex is an act of making love to many partners, both married and unmarried. It is meant to be intimate, loving and fun for both. However, if we don't talk about what we like or want in the bedroom, we could end up doing things that make each other feel awkward and that can lead to problems where we can feel so uncomfortable that we both end up not wanting sex at all.

It is not dirty or rude to talk about our sexual needs. Everybody has different needs in the bedroom, and in order to enjoy sex to its fullest, we need to be able to trust our partners. This means feeling comfortable enough to make our 'yes' or 'no' clear and to be able to describe what we really want. When we are able to do this, we can then ensure that our sex lives are satisfying and fulfilling for both of us.

I write sexual stories. Although most of my stories are based on fictional characters, their sexual actions are often based on what I like most in the bedroom. I have had an open discussion about these needs with my own partner, and talking in this way really helps us to understand each other better and adds more satisfaction to us both when it comes to sex.

Discussing sex is just as important as the act itself. Discussing sex can lead to many fun things in the bedroom. If society is going to do it, then society should be able to talk about it.

. It is important not to see sex as dirty, censored or taboo; particularly when it comes to partners.

It is not just sex that should be discussed; STD'S, Contraception and Pregnancy should also come into the conversation. Trust is an important topic when it comes to sex. It should not be considered invasive to ask about a sexual partner's previous sexual history, even if it is just a one night stand. It is important and vital to feeling comfortable discussing such issues. Unprotected sex can lead to many problems, and some STD'S can be fatal. It is common for two people to have sex at times when they barely know each other nowadays. No matter how well you know a person, if they do not respect your right to protection during sex, then it is not worth risking your health just because you both want to jump in bed with each other.

Let's briefly talk about the use of condoms.

It is a myth that condoms will prevent you from getting pregnant. They may offer protection from HIV and other diseases, but they will not prevent a pregnancy from occurring. Some condoms claim to be strong. However, I have used them in the past, and one of these so-called strong ones split during sex, which is how I found out I was pregnant with my third child. Of course, no protection can offer a 100 % guarantee against pregnancy, though if you do not want to become pregnant, then it is a good idea to speak with a GP or a Family Planning Clinic where you can get trustworthy advice. Sterilization can be an option, however, this may stop you from having any future babies, so only choose this option if you are certain you don't want a child.

The aim of this article is not to be judgemental. The majority of us adults want to enjoy a healthy and happy sex life. However, many people, including young adults feel uncomfortable talking about their sexual needs. I went through many years of rape and sexual assault, and I had no idea what it was until I got help. Sex should only go ahead if both parties verbally consent, and nobody whether male or female has the right to make you do something you do not want to do.

If you say no to something in the middle of sex, or you ask for it to be stopped; that is your right. If your no is disrespected and a partner ignores you and carries on, that is rape. You should always speak up about any form of sexual assault, abuse or rape. You have the right to feel safe during any sexual activity, and stop anything that you are uncomfortable with.

Consensual sex is meant to be loving, caring, intimate and fun. Consensual sex does not hurt.

If you are both going to do something as intimate as having sex, then your right to protect yourselves should be considered important.

. If you feel uncomfortable discussing these important issues with your partner, then it is important to discuss them with a professional.

If you like this article, please feel free to heart it. I also appreciate tips as tips enable me to ensure my equipment is in top shape!

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relationships

Carol Townend

A writer with a higher distinction, CPD in creative writing who loves all forms of writing, and well just writing!

I am also a wife, carer and a human living on a planet where the computer has taken over the pen!

I love Coffee!

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