When A Woman Love's

1 a.m and I’ve had my third drink at the bar. Nothing like the numbing sting of long Island iced tea, followed by some hennessy and cranberry juice. I grab the shot of tequila that sits in front of me and throw it back so hard my neck snaps. Ahhh the pain of doing it wrong, and I don’t mean just the drinking. I gaze around the bar with hazy eyes scoping out a victim. Tonight I’m a hungry hawk and I’m looking for danger.

I see a guy leaning on the bar his slim figure and poor attire and non-athletic build tells me he’s perfect for what I want tonight. Numb that's what I want to feel nothing as soon as possible. I stand on staggering legs trying to do my best cat walk over to the guy. With each step flashes of what happened to me hours ago come rushing to mind.

The slam of my head against the wall, the sting of my husband's hand against my cheek, the sour metallic sting of blood on my tongue. Unconsciously, I start rubbing all the spots that were so tender hours ago while walking towards the man. He looks up at me raised eyebrows as I make it closer to him.

In my best sober voice, “Hello, handsome would you mind buying a young lady aaaaaa drink?” my words falter coming out my mouth. I sound like a old fashioned static radio. “No I don’t mind buying a young lady a drink,” he said with a smile and motioned for me to lean in a lil closer. With a sly grin on my face I pull in closer to him my cleavage spilling ever so slightly on the bar. He places a hand around the nape of my neck as we are forehead to forehead now and whispers. “If only there was a young lady in front of me instead of a f***ing s**t,” his voice laced with disgust and breath foul of alcohol.

He snatched his hand away from my neck and I stood up out of mock horror and shame all too quickly that a swayed away from the bar. Suddenly firm hands grasped my shoulders and the smell of old spice assaulted my nostrils. Safe. The words jumped into my head unwilling. I opened my eyes and before me stood a male with a 5 o'clock shadow, mint green eyes and a strong athletic build. He wore some torn jeans a thick ugly Christmas sweater and Chelsea boots.

His mouth was set in a thin hard line and I couldn't seem to get any words out right. The aggressive drinking that I had done was starting to kick in and my world was blacking out. In and out of consciousness I hear the deep voice of the male who was holding me up. “What the f**k is wrong with you pal!” Then a flash of the younger man standing to his feet, followed by a swing to his face by the man holding me up. I heard a loud crash and then the world went black.

“What the hell Ashley I thought I told you to knock when the f***ing door is locked!” I’m standing in my bedroom door way my husband pulling himself out of another woman. “Why the f**k do I have to knock to get into my own God d**n HOUSE!” Wrong move Ashley, and I should know this by now. He storms across the room butt naked and slaps the hell out of me, I see stars. “Who the f**k are you talking to?” I look up at him in horror and my eyes flash to the half dressed woman fleeing our room, our home.

Of course she wouldn’t try to help all she signed up for was some d**k, not the hard times that come with it. My Husband grabs my face snapping my neck back in his direction, I hear a crack and not the type that feels good. “I pay the bills in this house, I make the rules do you understand?” I stare at him with a blank expression. He takes a hold of my frail neck with one of his callous hands and squeezes so hard my eyes start to pop from the sockets. My hands fly to his trying to pull away. “I said DO YOU UNDERSTAND!” He says through clenched teeth. “Yes” I manage to choke out and he releases me to the ground. Sputtering and coughing my lungs desperately suck in air.

My husband kneels down to my level concern on his face. “Why do you make me do these things?” he says with a sad expression. My heart aches from everything that this man puts me through. He kisses my forehead and I flinch, he looks pained by it and then anger returns. “I love you Ashley till death do us part!” and then the world goes black.

I wake slowly my mouth feels like sandpaper and I take in my surroundings. I'm laying in a king bed propped up by pillows. The room is huge a flat screen T.V taking up a full wall. The sun is out peeking through the black out curtains. I stare down at the ugly flannel PJ’s I'm in and my head is throbbing trying to remember what happened last night. In the corner someone clears their throat. My eyes shoot in his direction and I grasp the covers. Safe. There goes that word again and I slowly start to relax.

He stands the tall dark figure and walks over to me till the light shines on his face. “I won’t hurt you Ashley,” in a voice so warm it melts away some of the ice in my heart. “Who are you?” I say a prick of pain, and then suddenly the world….goes...black…

I’m falling spiraling in the darkness when I realized that I was hopeless. I was trapped in a house with a man I know nothing about. A very strong man with stern features and giant hands. “Broad shoulders” I mumble with my eyes closed. My eyes flutter open and the light from outside is very dim, letting me know that is late in the afternoon. I practically throw myself out of bed to the bedroom door. I take a deep breath and turn the knob slightly, my eyes grow wide in fear. “Its Locked,” I say softly to myself my head starts swimming. I can taste bile on the back of my tongue and I quickly run to a door that looks like the bathroom. Thank heaven it actually is I fling myself over the toilet as my body starts to heave out what little remains it had left. It’s locked. The words kept playing in my head like a broken record. “I’m trapped with a stranger he’s going to kill me.”

Safe. I hear the lock on the door go click, and then footsteps receding down the hallway. I walk back to the door and this time I quickly turn the knob. Open. The door is open but for some reason I didn’t want to leave the room anymore. If I left the room I would be exposed of what danger is out there. While I am frozen in my tracks I suddenly remembered a whole 24 hours have passed. 24 hours without any contact from my husband….. If I make it home alive I am surely a dead woman, I guess either way I am a dead woman but something in my body tells me I am more safe here then home. *Gahahahahaha* I start to laugh hysterically, “Who am I kidding how could I possibly be safe with a stranger?” I ask myself aloud. Nervously, I make my way down the hallway. The hall is very long and narrow, the walls to either side of me filled with paintings. When I reached the end my heart stopped for a second the apartment was huge! There was an enormous living room to my left filled with décor and a large L-shaped sofa. To the right was a dining room, marble floor throughout the entire space.

I reached up to my throat it was suddenly dry and thirst seized my body. I continued to my right and came across the kitchen. It was just how I wanted my future kitchen in my house to look. An island bar in the middle along with marble countertops it was amazing. I found a glass in one of the cabinets and took a drink from the facet. My head finally stopped spinning from everything that I was taking in, all that had happened in the last 24 hours. Then suddenly, a chill ran up my spin sending the hairs on the back of my neck straight up. I could feel his presence before I could hear him. “Are you awake and relaxed now,” his deep voice made me shiver. Slowly I turned to meet his eyes, finally, I thought. I will finally see the face of the stranger. My brows furrowed when I turned around because I was very wrong

A mask. There he was standing in front of my at 6’3 tall and all muscle, dusty blonde hair falling over top of a purge mask. Yet even though with that mask on I still wasn't scared, my breaths were coming out strong and steady. He slowly started to walk closer to me his mint green eyes on mine asking permission. He was asking me if this was ok cautious that he wouldn’t scare me. “W-Who are you?” My voice didn't come out as steady as my breathing and it made him stop in his tracks. In his eyes something change a look of uncertainty and awareness. “That's not important right now, let me check your head.” He places one hand under my chin and tilts my head to the side. Slowly he probes my forehead, “Ouch” I yell out and fling my hand to my head. I feel a lump on the left side of my head that I didn't even know was there before.

“You took quite a fall earlier”, he says while applying some ointment to my lump. My eyes squeeze together at the contact he was giving me. Not only from just the pain on my forehead but also the delight that came from his touch. I have not felt the gentle touch of a man for over 7 years, and even so it was my husband who was well ( not so gentle). His hand slide down the side of my face ever so slowly, and I leaned into his caress. His breath came in and out harshly and I opened my eyes to look into them. But what I saw made me stand up and back away, his eyes held pity. He felt sorry for me, the scared slutty wife who was lost. He knew I was hopeless and it made me feel so naked under his stare.

I wrapped my arms around myself trying to relieve the naked feeling but, it wasn't working. His eye’s changed from pity to dominance and he step forward and grabbed me. Holding my chin up so that I can once again meet his eyes he spoke soft but firm. “I will protect you Ashley with everything that I am”. I'm not sure why but his words made my tense body relax and I let out a deep sigh that I didn't know I was holding in. He pulled me close and hugged me, I let another man embrace me while I was still married. I never cheated on my husband and I didn’t want to, but every woman has a breaking point. Last night I had reached mine, ready to throw my life and marriage away. I was so lost but now I’m here in a stranger's arms feeling so comfortable and at home, but this isn’t home this isn’t even close to home. In all reality I’m a cheating wh**e and I need to get back to my husband. “ My husband,” my voice came out but a squeak. The first real words I say to this stranger and they aren't thank you but, my Husband……

“I need to call my husband,” this time my voice is louder and more clear. He looks at me eyes like darts with anger, and I back away. “H-He n-needs to know I’m ok that I’m not dead,” my words start to fail me. In his back pocket he pulls out his cellphone and extends it to me. “The number is already blocked so he won't be able to call you back make it quick.” I hesitate to grab the phone and I can tell his jaw twitched with agitation. “Not gonna stand here all day,” his tone is sharp and commands me to move. “It will only take a sec” I assure him and take the phone. Ring Ring. “Hello who is this?” my husband sounds like he was busy with something, or someone. My nasty conscious rears its ugly head at me. “John it’s me Ashley I wanted to call you to tell you that I’m alright.” I hear him snort on the other end. “I wasn’t worrying about you being a filthy wh**e.” Tears stung my eyes. “That’s what you were doing right, you couldn't take a hit so you let some other scum rub you out.” I couldn’t hold back the tears any more. “John please listen I…..”

“You’re a wh**e Ashley but you're only supposed to be my wh**e, don’t bother bringing that washed out hole of yours back to this house.” His voice was nasty I knew he had a sneer on his face. “If I ever see you again I’ll kill you, you hear me you B***H I”LL KILL YOU !” Click. The phone disconnected and I stood there with my mouth agape and eyes wide open in fear. My own husband wants to kill me. What reason do I have for living now? I have no money, no kids, no house, no car and...and… no Husband. I drop to the floor onto my knees I start to shake uncontrollably, then I feel firm hands on my back. I look up terrified from all that I am not realizing. “I told you I will protect you with all that I am, and I meant that.” I couldn't help it I leaned into this stranger that was offering me life instead of death and cried. I cried and cried until I felt a pinch on my arm, then the world…….went…..black.

It’s warm, it’s way to warm. I wake in the middle of the night with sweat dripping from my body. My clothes are sticking to me and I feel like I’m in desperate need of a shower. I roll over to my side trying to find a cool sport and suddenly I’m overwhelmed in heat as I bump into the source. Him. I am laying in bed with another man, a stranger at that. A stranger that just so happened to save your life twice. I couldn't believe all that had happened to me in such a short period of time. I’m in bed with another man. My eyes grew wide and I popped out of the bed so fast I stumbled backwards onto the floor, hitting my back on the chair. Making a loud thud sound I wake a sleepy stranger. “Are you ok,” his deep raspy voice resonated something deep within me. I felt my heartbeat speed up and the blood in my body flowed to one area. “I-I'm ok was just startled that's all.” He turns over and in the dark I feel his eyes on me. His mask is off this I can tell but, all I can see is a shadow of a face. “If that's the case would you like to sleep somewhere else?” I don’t know how to answer so I keep my mouth shut. “I assumed that you didn’t want to be alone after your conversation from earlier,” he looks at me with raised eyebrows.

He was right, just a few hours ago was ready to throw my life away. Now this man has shown me that my life is worth fighting for. He stands out of the bed and walks over to the door. “P-Please don’t go,” I shout out without thinking. I am surprised myself how I could be so bold and say something like that. Asking another man to stay by my side. I never thought I would be able to confide in another man other then my husband….ever. With a sigh of defeat he climbs back into the bed motioning for me to join him. I stare at the floor staring at his dark figure not able to move a muscle. “I won’t touch you Ashley I promise.”

It’s strange really his promises, his words, they aren’t empty. I can feel his meaning behind them and it always delivers a sense of healing to my body. But still….. “Who are you?” I ask because I still don’t know. His body stiffens in the bed and I see him shrink in the darkness at my question. He becomes restless like he’s uncomfortable. “It doesn’t really matter who I am, just know that I’m not here to harm you,” he turns his back to me. “That doesn’t answer my question though, you're still a stranger to me.” It becomes very silent in the room not even the wind is making a sound. Safe. That one word plays involuntarily in the back of my mind. “Am I safe here with you?”

“Of course you are safe, as long as you are with me I will chase away all your pain, and those out to destroy you.” He extends his hand out to me in the dark, I reluctantly take it and climb into bed. As we lay in the bed the distance becomes uncomfortable for me and I move closer to him. Feeling his warm back sends me into another deep sleep warm, fuzzy, and happy. As my reality world darkened the dream world became unbelievably bright.

“Ashley get your a** down here!”, it’s John’s voice but why?

“Ashley you b***h do you hear me calling you,” I start running down the stairs. What I am greeted with at the bottom of the steps is a backhand smack to the face. Falling to the ground I start seeing black spots and my face is on fire. “Don’t make me call your name more then once you hear me, now take it off.” I look at my husband confused and in pain not knowing what he is saying to me. “I said take it OFF YOU S**T,” he grabs my shirt and rips it off my head. I swing my arms up pushing him away trying to escape. Smack . Another sting on my face this time I think I’m about to fall unconscious. “Show daddy how much of a wh**e you were to that man, show me how you didn’t even put up a fight.” He yanks off my pants and I start to kicking my legs tears streaming down my face. ‘Stop squirming you little b***h, before I really put you to sleep,” I’m crying so hard that I can't breath. He positions himself in front of me with disgust on his face, I can taste bile in my mouth. “ John please,” I whimper. Just before I feel nothing but sheer pain. “This is what you like you little wh**e, to get screwed by men who don’t care about you.” Pain all I feel is pain before my body goes numb, Johns twisted expression looming over me. He wraps his hand around my throat and thrust into me hard. No pace, no care, no love behind it just hate. He starts choking me so hard that I can’t breath, this time I let him, I let him abuse my body as I black out.

“Ashley, Ashley wake up, WAKE UP ASHLEY,” someone is calling out to me. “Ashley are you alright,” I feel my body get a little shake and my eyes fling open. My face and pillow are wet with tears. A dream. It was a dream but it felt so real, I place my hand on my stomach and I can feel the pain from the dream. Quickly I sit up and throw myself over the bed, as I puke my life away.

Disgusted. I am disgusted by what happened in my dream so much that I was unable to contain it. My stranger friend comes to my side on the bed and lifts me up. I feel weak unable to talk, walk, or protest to him carrying me. Once more I know that I probably smell like rotten fish eggs right now, considering I had not showered in 24 hours and I just threw up. He carries me to the bathroom and places me carefully down into the tub. I'm still fully dressed yet he turns the water on its cool and feels great on my skin. I'm burning up and don’t know what’s the cause of it, placing a towel behind my head he let me relax in the tub. My eyes roam around the huge bathroom the tub is an old fashioned style soaking tub in the middle of the floor. To the left is a walk-in shower with 6 dual shower heads. To the right is one double sink installation and I am amazed.

“They say you can tell a lot about a man from his home,” he says to me my eyes land right on his and my face turns red, as my eyes grow wide. His mask is off. He’s smiling at me but the smile quickly fades as he realizes what I am staring at. His hands fling to his face but it's too late, I have already seen what happens to be the most attractive man I ever seen in my whole life. His jaw-line was hard and straight, giving way to excellent cheekbones. I have never seen such smooth clear skin before, he looked like a movie star, and I couldn't stop staring. Standing quickly, “I’ll be right back,” he said before he exited the bathroom. My heart was thumping loudly in my chest I was well aware that I was not dreaming.

When he returned I frowned because, the mask was now once again hiding that beautiful face if his. “I’ve already seen you there is no need to hide,” I say a smile playing at my lips. “This mask is to protect you Ashley I was careless and now I could have put you in danger.” HaHa. Mister funny guy over here. “In danger of what falling in love,” I say giggling afterwards but when I looked into his eyes he held cold seriousness. It made me stop smiling immediately and shrink a little into the tub. Who is this man and why does it seem like he has two sides to himself? I grow weary and he can see it in my eyes, his hand reaches out to touch my cheek and I flinch involuntarily. His hand balls into a fist and with draws. Uh oh, he didn’t like that.

“Damn-it I'm not here to hurt you Ashley,” his voice sounds hurt he stand and walks away. A few second later I hear him talking on the phone, a one ended conversation on my side. “Yeah… Sh*t really?.... F**k why now I can’t…..Fine ok I’ll be right there,” I hear him walking towards the bathroom and I close my eyes. “I have something I have to do, when I walk out of here the doors will lock automatically,” he talks in a hurried breath. I look at him and nod my head. “No One will be able to get in,” a brief pause, “And you won’t be able to get out.” I gave him a look to say, as if I would try and he closes the door. A few minutes later I hear the door slam and I nearly slip jumping out of the tub. I didn't bother to dry off I was still fully dressed and dripping every where. I ran to the door and pulled on the knob. WTF. There is a key code to get out the damn door. “This is a fire Hazard!” I yell to the top of my lungs. Yet I knew he didn’t even hear me.

I slowly starting to panic realizing that I’m all alone an now locked inside a stranger's house. My breaths are coming in and out short and, my lungs feel like someone is pressing on them. Calm down Ash it’s ok you're safe. Lately my conscious has been more aware of situation then I have and, for some reason she always seems to calm me down. I inhale and exhale deep a few times to get my breathing under control. Then my stomach grumbles. Only I would be distracted by hunger at a time like this. Feeling defeated I walk over to the kitchen and open the fridge. There is some chicken parmesan and pasta on a plate wrapped up. This is what I was smelling earlier when I first woke, I never got to ask what was cooking. I grab the plate and shove it in the fancy microwave that took me at least 5 minutes to start it up. Once the food starts popping all over the inside I can tell it's time to eat. I start shoving down chunks of chicken the flavor mixed with my hunger is too much for me. I’m thankful that he isn’t here to see me right now. Head down not even breathing between bites, I look like a true beast. Finally I lift my head up to sit back for a minute I knew I was eating way too fast. But there was something blinking out the corner of my eye.

There was a red light blinking in the living room right next to a black door. I got up and walked over to it jiggling the knob a little bit. On the side was a thumb pad and I pressed on it, “Fingerprint not recognized,” a electronic voice said to me. Duh of course, because you don’t live here. Now I am all to curious on what stays behind this door in this beautiful home. I press the pad two more times before it tells me I’m locked out for good. My next attempt is to slide a card between the lock. Right when I turn around to look for one I bump into a solid figure panting hard.

Whoops it’s him. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you that snooping around other people’s home is rude?” I believe that question was not meant to answer so I just looked at him and blinked. “You don’t really want to see what's behind that door,” suddenly I start to feel like Ana in Fifty Shades of Grey. But just when my lower region was about to get excited he pulled me in closer to him and whispered into my ear. “No it’s not my red room of pain, or my play palace,” then he released me waiting for a reaction. My reaction is frustrated and annoyed, I was upset because he knew what I was thinking. I was annoyed because, he knew what I was thinking and wasn’t doing anything about it. You dirty little wh**e. My conscious sounded more like my husband that time and I had to snap back into real life, I was ripped from the fantasy world.

When I look into his eye’s again he’s still staring at me this time like he’s debating on something. Before I ask him what’s wrong he starts to lean in closer to me. I noticed the part of the mask that covers his lips is cut out. So his mouth is coming closer and closer to mine. He’s going to kiss you. I turn my head to the side and squeeze my eyes together. I’m still married. He grabs my face and tilts it back into his direction. I’m still married. He comes in closer once again. I’m still married. I hold my breath and then suddenly I’m falling. The door behind me opens and I hear him say “Oh sh*t.” What I now see and what I'm surrounded by has me shaking with fear. “Y-Y-You’re a-an ASSASSIN!”