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Passion Killers In a Relationship and How to Avoid Them

Every relationship has its struggles, and there are a few key passion killers which everyone should keep an eye out for and avoid.

By Lizzie BoudoirPublished 7 years ago 4 min read

Have you been in a relationship for a while now? Are you starting to realize that there are a couple of passion killers you're struggling to address? At the beginning of a relationship you can barely contain the passion! You're both really enthusiastic about this new journey that you're embarking on together and the potential routes it could take. It's all an intriguing mystery that you think will never end! However, every relationship has its struggles… and there are a few key passion killers which everyone should keep an eye out for and avoid.

If your three course meal at a nice restaurant has turned into a microwave meal watching Netflix, this will effect all aspects of your relationship. The 21st century lifestyle has changed people's approach to relationships and an increasing number of people end up having a one year relationship and then ending it rather than getting married. There are a few things that we do naturally as we get comfortable with someone that can kill the passion between you. Put in a little extra effort to avoid these passion killers and maybe you can be among the lucky few who find love despite their generation's skewed view of dating.


Untidiness in the love making arena is a big fat no! Let's just get this straight, if you want to have sex with your significant other and things are getting steamy in the living room, one of you says “let's take this to the bedroom…” and when you get in bed you lay in a pile of cookie crumbs, that is a borderline deal breaker! If there is any place in the whole house to keep clean and tidy it is the bedroom. There's no arguing with me on this one so take notes, go and change your bed sheets and look after them! A wise man once told me to look after your bed and your footwear because if you're not in one you’re in the other. Live by this philosophy and you can easily avoid this passion killer.

Partner Pounds

I’d like to address something I've named "partner pounds." This refers to the weight the majority of people put on when they feel comfortable in a relationship. This is not okay. If you have worked hard to get in good shape in the first place then you should never let it all go down the drain because you get too comfortable. This isn't to say you need to stay thin because of your partner. They should always say you look great despite a few pounds here or there, as we're all bound to go through weight changes now and again. Just don't let them be the reason you're packing on the pounds. If you're unhappy with your current weight, skip the extra large stuffed crust dominos takeaway that they want to order on game day. Being unhappy with your weight can lead you to be self conscious in the bedroom, and this can seriously harm the passion in your relationship.

Less Than Satisfactory Sex Life

This leads me on to my next passion killer, a lackluster sex life. My personal opinion is that sex with the right person is amazing and I can't think of a good reason that people in love would not have amazing sex. However, there are a variety of things that can get in the way of this, so try to maintain a sex life that you are both happy with. Everyone has a right to say no when they aren't in the mood, but if you find yourself saying no more often than yes, take a look at the problem. Also try to find a way to let your partner down easy when you do say no, as this can easily hurt their feelings. So if you're REALLY not in the mood, be careful how you go about articulating it. However, if you're looking to spice up your sex life, maybe try some new outfits and sex toys. There's nothing wrong with experimenting, and it could give one or both of you the added boost you've been needing.

Sort Our Your Snoring

I like my sleep. I like my sleep so much that if something stops me from getting my eight hours of peace before I have to wake up at ridiculous-o’clock for work, I will find who is responsible and cut their eyelids off so they're awake all the time as well! So if you're a snorer, try to manage this as well as you can. I appreciate that you can only know if you snore if someone lets you know, but if someone tells you that you snore and you do nothing about it, when you die you will get rejected at the gates of heaven, as snoring is the work of the devil. A snoring problem has the potential to create huge conflict in a relationship and can cause frustration and resentment amongst couples. More often than not it will lead to couples sleeping in separate bedrooms, and in these separate bedrooms there is absolutely no room for passion for one another. They have special pillows and mattress pads that can help reduce snoring, so if you're a loud sleeper maybe try one of these before your partner loses too much sleep.

Having a healthy, passionate relationship with the person you love isn't always easy. It can be extremely exciting and rewarding but this doesn't come without a little bit of work and commitment from both sides. The highs come with the lows and the rough comes with the smooth but a little bit of effort goes a long way to ensuring your relationship is passionate and sexually active.


About the Creator

Lizzie Boudoir

Thrice married, in love once, overly romantic, and hypersexual.

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