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Over 50 Different Dirty Pick-Up Lines for Women to Use On Men

#HumourHour #Feminism #NancyD

By Nancy DPublished 5 years ago 5 min read
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All through college there were penis jokes made all the time and I couldn't help but notice that tiny little penises were often found drawn on the back of chairs... most importantly, there were constant jokes of different cheesy and sometime just gross pick-up lines that men could use on woman. So this is my little way of rebelling. Please enjoy this collection of over 50 different dirty pick up lines for women to use on men! However, please note that these are for humour purposes... so if you intend to actually try to use one of these... proceed with caution, because you might offend a couple of people. Then again, if you use one of these and they take it too seriously and then they go way out of line by calling you a tease... that part isn't your fault! Make sure to accept that red flag and stay away from whoever that person is.

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly Pick Up Lines

I made sure to organize the pick up line into three different categories since some of them... well... seem to go bit too far one way or another. Just please don't actually try any from "The Ugly" section in real life. If the stuff in the bad section is already starting to offend you... maybe don't take a look at the ugly section... you've been warned.

The Good

These are the best, they aren't too gross and are potentially effective.

  • Why did it take you so long to come into my life?
  • If I told you I work for UPS, would you let me handle your package?
  • Do you like to eat Mexican food? Because you're heating up my taco.
  • That shirt is very becoming on you. Then again, I'd be cumming if I was on you too.
  • Do you want to give me an Australian kiss? It's like French kissing but down under.

  • Are you a rainstorm? Because you're making me dripping wet.
  • Do you know how to use a whip?

  • I've got the buns. Do you have the sausage?
  • Shall we let only latex stand between our love.
  • Your body is wonderland and I want to be Alice.

  • How much woman can you handle?
  • Your belt looks a bit too tight. Let me loosen it for you.

  • I’m wearing Revlon Colorstay Lipstick, want to help me test the claim that it won’t kiss off?

  • Hey handsome, what's your name?

  • I can read your palm. Your heart line says that you will call me soon.

  • The best time is the present. So what are your plans right now?

  • You are the type of man a girl would be lucky to have.

  • When I wake up in the morning, you are the first thing that I want to see.

The Bad

A collection of bad pickup lines that I felt should still make the list for one reason or another.

  • There are no seats, can I sit on your face?
  • Do you have a napkin? You're making me wet.
  • Can I call you butter buns?
  • Can I have some sausage to go with my English McMuffin?

  • You look like a hard worker. I have an opening you can fill.
  • I'm a spy on a secret mission... Cum in me, if you want to live.
  • Wanna play Army? You be the enemy and I'll blow you away.
  • I don't know what you think of me, but I hope it's X-rated.

  • I know a woman who is interested in you. If I wasn't so shy, I’d let you know who.

  • You are hotter than a sunburn.

  • Aren’t you the guy who was going to get me a drink?

  • Is that a keg in your pants?... 'cause I want to tap that!

  • Were you a part of the Boy Scouts? Because you have my heart tied in a knot.

  • I was looking for a man with a VCR and I found one. "Very Cute Rear"

  • Hold on.. I need to catch my breath... sorry about that, you took my breath away.

  • You look a lot like my future boyfriend.

  • Only latex will stand in the way of our love.

  • I like your pants. Do you mind if I test out the zipper?

The Ugly

These ones are just bad... but oddly entertaining!

  • Is your dad the muffin man? Because you sure do give me a banana cream filling.
  • You are ugly, but you interest me.
  • I might not be the most attractive lady here, but I am the only one speaking with you.
  • Hello, gorgeous. I’m like a tropical island. I am hot, wet and ready for visitors.
  • Hey, can you take a picture with me? I want to make my ex jealous.
  • Can we take a picture? I need to show Santa what I want for Christmas.
  • What is better than a rose on a piano? Tulips on an organ.
  • You must eat Lucky Charms because, baby, you are magically delicious.
  • You have been such a naughty boy. Go to my bedroom.
  • Hey handsome, We should play hockey. I can be the net, so you can score.
  • Can I have some raisins? [Him: No, sorry] Well, then, can I have a date?
  • If I said I loved your body, would you hold it against me?
  • Pleasure to meet you. I am [name] and you are handsome.
  • Is my vagina crying, or are you just sexy?
  • Hi. I have a vagina.
  • Are you a squirrel? Because I can see your nuts
  • Wanna go halfsies on a baby?
  • My body is a movie and your penis is the star!
  • Is it wet in here, or is it just my vagina?

Pick up lines can be used by ladies too... right?

A lot of these pick up lines are just for fun... please don't try to meet your next boyfriend by using any of the lines from "The Ugly" side! With that said, woman don't have to wait for a man to ask them out on a date... it turns out that men find it pleasantly refreshing when a woman asks them out first!!! So why not try some of the better lines from this article?

Hello. Nice to meet you! How are you? Hmm... this feels like a really one-sided conversation... why don't you follow me on social media so I can get to know you too! A nice and simple one that works in almost any scenario is: "Hey handsome, what's your name?"

About the Author

I started blogging about two years ago and my collection of blogs and articles is getting pretty impressive. I’ve taken online classes for writing and even some classes about the art of blogging itself. It would be really awesome if you join the adventure and maybe even help me think of what to write about next. If you would like to submit some feedback or ideas, you can always tweet me on Twitter.

Like the story? Share it on social media

Thank you for reading my article. Would it be okay if I ask another favour though? Would it be okay if you share this on your Facebook page or Twitter? If you can't share, there is a tiny little donate box at the bottom too. No pressure though, just thought I would mention.

Work Cited

“100 Pick Up Lines for Girls to Use on Guys.” Herinterest.com/, 2019, www.herinterest.com/100-pick-up-lines-for-girls-to-use-on-guys/.

Barcella, Laura. “10 Tips From Female Pickup Artists.” ELLE, ELLE, 9 Oct. 2017, www.elle.com/life-love/sex-relationships/news/a15346/tips-from-female-pickup-artist/.

“Dirty Pick Up Lines For Girls To Use On Guys.” LaffGaff Home Of Fun And Laughter, 2018, laffgaff.com/dirty-pick-up-lines-for-girls-use-guys/.

“Pick Up Lines Galore!” Pick Up Lines for Women and Girls - Try These out on Men!, www.pickuplinesgalore.com/women.html.

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About the Creator

Nancy D

Facebook @NancyDBlogging

Twitter @BlogsNancy

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