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Making Love vs Having Sex

The Difference Between Love Making and Sex

By Rick VermuntPublished 4 years ago 5 min read
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What Is Real Love?

Are making love and having sex the same thing?

For many people, having sex and making love is the same thing. Broadly speaking, it could be said that these two activities are similar, as they both imply an intimate physical connection between two partners. However, saying that these two acts are identical would be a huge mistake, because if you take a closer look at how they take place and what their purpose is, it becomes clear that they are different. Sex relates more to an animalic desire, typically not involving emotions, the aims to satisfy body needs. On the other hand, lovemaking is an expression of love accompanied by an explosion of emotions preserved even after the intercourse. It goes beyond physical intimacy, connecting also the souls and minds of both partners.

What are the main differences between lovemaking and sex

1. Motivation

The variable that helps most in understanding the difference between the two acts is the motivation of the partners. People that claim to have sex are mainly driven by a wild desire of satisfying the primitive needs of their body, an act that can be performed even by animals. Their ultimate goal is to release sexual tension and turn their insane stimulation into a physical satisfaction that makes them happy.

While the main motivation for having ordinary sex lies in the increased levels of stimulation of the nervous system, the motivation for making love lies beyond the desire for experiencing a trivial physical thrill. Those engaged in making love are driven by an endless desire to explore the depths of their partner's soul, creating a physical bridge that allows them perform an exchange of energy, thoughts and emotions.

2. The probability of repeating the act

The two acts have also a different continuity. While sex is mostly associated with an one-night adventure, lovemaking is more of a sustainable process that is highly likeable to take place again and again, without partners losing the attraction for each other. Sex is based on physical attraction and a man can lose this attraction to a woman as soon as he enjoys her beautiful body and gets rid of excess sexual stimulation.

Psychological attraction though is more durable and it is harder to brake. Even after having several love making sessions a day, the partners will stay as attracted to each other as before because they are in love not only with each other's appearance but also with each other's soul and personality.

3. The importance of sexual skills

It may come as a surprise but one of these acts requires not so much sexual skill for leading to supreme satisfaction of the partners. During ordinary sex, a man must prove a good sex performance and play hard to turn the intercourse into a success story. This is because there isn't any emotional connection between the partners and the man cannot receive a proper feedback from the woman to stimulate and encourage him perform better.

When it comes to lovemaking though, sex skills hardly have any impact on whether the partners will enjoy eventually the act. Lovemaking is beyond physical satisfaction. The man doesn't have to think about showing off his wild skills to satisfy his woman. She will enjoy the act anyway, because her body is stimulated not only by the physical connection that happens during the intercourse, but also by the personality of her man, his soul and his intelligence. Still, many love-making men boast excellent sex skills. Read on the article to find out why.

So sex skills are not so important during lovemaking. This act is just a way of merging two bodies into a single one, celebrating a supreme expression of love and tending to explore the depths of your lover's soul where you don't need sex abilities at all. Also, while a man's failure or poor performance during sex can be punished or laughed at, a man's mistake during lovemaking will hardly motivate the woman to change her opinion about her partner as her love for him goes beyond body features.

4. Who you seek to satisfy

Lovemaking is also about caring for your partner's feelings and ensuring that he or she gets satisfied. And here is where the next difference between the two acts comes. Generally, men who claim to have sex instead of making love engage in this process to satisfy their own desires and necessities. To some extent, they even don't care about how the woman feels and whether she enjoys the intercourse. Their main goal is to feel good themselves.

If speaking of lovemaking, man's ultimate objective is to make his woman satisfied, not himself. He puts effort in reaching out to the deepest intimate spots of her body to allow her achieve a peak sexual gratification. Love-making men don't stop as soon as they reach orgasm themselves. They keep on endeavoring up until they ensure that their woman gets satisfied too.

With that said, men that tend to become outstanding love-makers train a lot their skills since they have to perform excellently to lead their women to orgasms. Women engaged in lovemaking though are able to reach orgasm faster because of their insane feelings and strong emotional connection with their men.

5. Eye contact

Eye contact might seem an insignificant aspect when trying to identify the difference between lovemaking and having sex. However, one can easily understand when a couple makes love by the intensive and long-lasting eye contact that partners make during the intercourse. Eye contact helps establish a strong emotional connection and increase the intimacy between partners. And since feelings and affection are important elements of lovemaking, looking in each other's eyes is indispensable, allowing to dive into the inner world of your partner and explore it.

When it comes to ordinary sex, eye contact is not what partners look so eagerly to do, because the level of intimacy is low. Partners are not connected emotionally and don't need to explore the inner worlds of each other, but they rather seek to satisfy some primitive body needs in an one-night adventure.

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About the Creator

Rick Vermunt

Rick is a blogger for Adultsmart an online adult lifestyle blog/shop with over 30 years in the adult industry. An advocate of equality and free choice his articles have been featured on Huffington Post, Elle,  Mens Health and many more.

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