An Argument For Anal

You might view this article as opinionated, satirical, or a well-researched piece on historical facts that back up my stance on a certain hot button issue. What it isn't, is me trying to sway you one way or another. I have come to learn that people are going to do what they are going to do on their path through life as they evolve and learn right from wrong. Though I am pro-life except in extreme circumstances, I respect your right to make the choices you do no matter how misguided or immoral I may find them. The beauty of this great big beautiful pile of dirt that we all ride on while it hurtles through space is just that; it's huge and I don't have to associate with you if I don't want to. There's plenty of room for everyone to go about their day and never meet someone again if we so choose.

Before I begin, let me say, I think the argument over abortion is a pretty immature one, given the alternatives. I also view it as murder no matter which way you spin it, and that it's an unwillingness not an inability to take responsibility for your actions, depending on the circumstances, (i.e. Rape, incest, or a horrific agonizing birth defect). Again, there're endless alternatives to abortion before and after birth, but for the sake of this article, I will try to focus on before.

The church would tell you to abstain, which to a degree I think is pretty unrealistic after a certain point in life. There's also the fact that it falls on parents to educate their kids more about sex and waiting, at least until they're out of school. Being a father myself, I think an added weight falls heavily on our shoulders to be a little overprotective of our daughters and our sons as well. I think these roles differ slightly though. We have to teach our sons to be better men, and we have to teach our daughters to seek out better men... if that's what they're into. We also have to teach our daughters to look out for men that are like the horny little immature bastards packing a meat-seeking missile, that we used to be.

As far as alternatives to the bundle of joy-inducing, vaginal intercourse; the list is pretty extensive. Downright disturbing at times depending on the tragic childhood, you're trying to heal from. At least use protection. Although condoms aren't 100% effective and birth control has a lot of side effects at times leaving you to wonder if it's even worth it. You're fighting nature, and that's never good. Lucky for you there do exist, other ways to get to the almighty "O" without pumping your body full of chemicals or wrapping your tool in a hot dog casing...for any of you that are into sheepskin.

Oral for example is a great way to get there. Who doesn't like a kiss down south from time to time to time to time? Yes I know I doubled that. Couple your southern kiss with some hands-on skills and you've got a winning combo that you can work each other into orgasmic delirium with, all day long. Then come the mechanical masterpieces of the modern age that can help you massage out some extra squeals of glee before collapsing in happy sexual exhaustion. Still, if all this isn't enough and the art of conversation hasn't driven you over the edge, the list is long when it comes to ways to stimulate a budding relationship or even a stale marriage.

Anal is one that is still seen as taboo in a lot of circles, mainly in the US, and has the rest of the world wondering why. Some say that we here in the US are way behind the times when it comes to butt stuff, and I for one think we need to catch up. I always thought myself to be well versed on the subject, yet found out that I still had a lot to learn.

When I was younger, I always thought there was something wrong with me for being so into it until I found out that it's a normal kink and everyone has kinks to some extent. Researching kinks, I came to realize that mine are rather tame given the scope of all that is out there. Working as security in a Greek night club I also overheard that anal is referred to as Greek Style and had been used for ages as a form of birth control. This resonated with me because I am always on the side of natural alternatives to potentially harmful science.

As I was researching this article though I stumbled across a Men's Health article that turned out to be a little more informed than me. In the article, I found out that actually, the Moche tribes of Peru were the first recorded to have used anal sex as birth control. Their pottery even depicts anal more than vaginal as the norm for consenting adults. The Greeks did use it as birth control but their literature has it focused more on the bisexual aspect in the military among male leaders and their subordinates. Anal was often the first sexual intercourse though, in the Greek culture, between a husband and bride on their wedding night.

Biblically speaking, the bible doesn't exactly mention anal either. What it refers to is instances in Sodom in Gomorrah when angels were being raped. If we're being technical, they are referring to non-consensual intercourse or sodomy, not kinky butt stuff between consenting adults. This is my understanding and interpretation though. I'm sure the religious fanatics would debate this view, but they've been changing meanings to fit their changing narratives for millennia. Again though, we don't have to agree and this world is big enough that I never have to see you. Yay!

Whether anal is for you or not, it's still, in my opinion, a much better alternative to the life-changing decision that is abortion. Let's be honest; you will never be the same after you go through with it, and that is from countless women that have done it. Plus, it can produce some pretty mind-blowing orgasms when done right. Given that the clitoral cluster extends from right above the urethra to well up inside the anus. If you've got someone going to pound town on the back end, while you're pressing the magic button in front; you can be sure it won't be long before your firing off like a euphoric rocket.

Hey, the way I see it, millions of gay men can't be wrong. We may be attracted to different genders, but we both like the butt. Talk about unity. The whole world coming together, one booty at a time.

As with all sexual encounters, be safe and use lube as needed. Think long and hard about whether you're ready to be a parent before having sex. If you have any doubts then don't, but at the least, if you can't hold out any longer and you need to be as close to each other as humanly possible, then spread your sweet cheeks and go wild!