What They Don't Tell You About Childbirth

Has anyone ever told you that childbirth is so beautiful? Well they are wrong. The only beautiful part about childbirth is your sweet precious baby or babies that are born. Other than that, the whole process is pretty much a disaster. For some, the process is extremely easy. For most, the process was like mine. The hardest thing I have ever experienced.

If you're expecting or plan to be expecting with your first then you might want to refrain from reading this article. I am going to explain my process, though it is very different for every single mother. The first is always the hardest, but if you can get through that, then you can get through every child after. Childbirth is the worst physical pain you will ever experience, but postpartum is the worst emotional pain. Motherhood is a disaster all around, but it is so worth it. My son is the greatest thing that has ever happened to my husband and I. After losing our first one, he was a miracle. He is currently almost three months old. To be honest, I still haven't recovered. Postpartum sucks.

Let's start from the beginning: Nine months is a VERY long time to carry a growing baby inside of your body. The nutrients and vitamins that you take in everyday are crucial in your baby's development. I mean, how amazing is it that we can grow a human inside of our bodies? Pretty amazing if you ask me. There are three stages to pregnancy, just like their are three trimesters. First: excitement, overjoy, a little fear, love. Second: fear, love, exhaustion, sickness, weirdness. Third: anger, excitement, love, extreme fear, clueless. And, if you are anything like me, you worry your entire pregnancy. I worried about wonders of things including what will my baby look like, what if my baby doesn't love me, and most of all whether my baby was healthy. Pregnancy is very hard on a woman. So men, please respect us for carrying your children.

As you get toward the end of your pregnancy, life pretty much changes. You can no longer do many of the tasks that you used to be able to do in your first trimester. It's very wise to give yourself a break from a job or school in your last trimester because once you have that baby, you will never have a break again. I'm serious. Take the last trimester to enjoy yourself, hold your man a little extra tonight, and tell him how much you love him because no matter what everyone says about relationships after a baby, they do change. You will fight a little more, you will disagree more than ever, and you will both be super exhausted. It doesn't mean you don't love him, it just means that both of you are trying your hardest to adapt to parenthood, and that's okay. I promise.

So like I have said before, there are many crucial developments and changes that a baby undergoes in the womb. But, nobody really ask what changes the mother goes through whenever all of this is happening inside of her. Well there are a few things that your body can develop that aren't necessarily good for your baby or you. This includes gestational diabetes (high blood sugar) and preeclampsia (high blood pressure). I developed preeclampsia is the last month of my pregnancy, which lead me to be induced at 37 weeks. Also, my baby was already extremely big for his gestational age. He was measuring to be 10 pounds if I went to full term. That's a big baby.

I got induced the same night as my doctors appointment. I had protein in my urine, which is an indication for preeclampsia, and my blood pressure was over 150/80. I was suppose to be at the hospital with all my bags packed by 7pm that night, September 16, 2019. They told me to eat as much as I wanted because once I got admitted I would be on a clear liquid diet until my baby was born. So I went home, ate pizza, finished packing my bags, called my husband (who left work early), cleaned the house, took care of the dogs, got the carseat in the truck, grabbed my pillow and blanket, and took off for the hospital. We were both so nervous yet so excited to meet our little bundle of joy. I will say that was one of the greatest moments about being pregnant.

So we got there, got checked it, they took us to our room, and we got settled. The nurses came in to ask me questions, started an IV, and then left the room. The doctor came in shortly after that to explain the process he was planning on taking. I remember one thing he said was, "It could take three or more days for you to go into labor." THREE OR MORE DAYS?! I told myself there is no way I am going to be in this hospital for more than three days without having my baby by my side. After he left, we went to sleep. The next morning I was started on pitocin, a drug to starts dilation. I was on it the entire day and had continuous cervical checks every 2-3 hours. On top . of that, I had light contractions the entire day. From 5am to 3pm, I only dilated to 1cm. You have to dilate to a 10 before you start pushing. Almost 12 hours, and I only dilated to a 1. Wow. I was furious. I asked them to go and get me a yoga ball to bounce on to induce labor, which works for many pregnant women. They brought me one about thirty minutes later, and I began bouncing on it immediately. I was talking to my cousin, who was in the room with me. Then, I felt a popping sensation in my pelvic area. Like a rubber band snapping. I looked at my cousin, and I said, "Something just happened." She told me to stand up, so I did. Once I stood up, a gush of water came out like a waterfall. My water had just broke. It's almost baby time.

From 4pm on Tuesday September 17th to 6am on Wednesday September 18th, I was in active labor, contractions every 1-2 minutes. And let me tell you, that is the worst pain you will ever experience, unless you get the epidural. I almost forgot, I got the epidural an hour after my water broke, but by the time I started pushing, the epidural wore off on my right side. So to get technical, I could feel all the pain on my right side, but nothing on my left. Weird, right? I thought so too. From 6am to 8am, I was pushing. Two whole hours of pushing, with the worse contractions ever. I was miserable. So much pain. At 8:03am, my baby boy was born. As soon as he was out, the contractions immediately went away, and everything went black. I fell asleep from being so mentally and physically exhausted. I didn't see my baby until an hour after he was born because I was asleep. Pushing takes all the energy in your body, so it is very common to be so exhausted after delivery.

Recovering was awful the first couple of days. I was discharged from the hospital that Saturday, because of some complications with my iron and potassium levels. Another exciting feature that most people don't tell you is that the doctors usually find a bunch of stuff wrong with you that you never knew about before until after you have your baby. Mine was extremely low potassium levels, and possible complications with my heart. The heart complications ended up being nothing, thankfully.

Once you get home from the hospital, not only do you have to recover from the bleeding, pain, and cramps, but you also have to take care of a newborn. This is what I mean by postpartum being an emotional rollercoaster, and if you happen to get postpartum depression, it's okay. I did, and many other women do too. It's normal. Just seek help from your doctor and talk to some of your friends. Most likely someone you know has went through it before and can help you through it as well. Postpartum is crazy hard on your body with the crazy hormones that are trying to leave your body to the crying baby that never seems to stop. It's hard, but it's also understandable. Trust me when I say I thought motherhood was easier than this. Every mother makes it look easy, but what you don't see on the inside is what really hurts. Mothers are good about hiding their exhaustion, their emotions, their anger, and many other problems.

All in all, motherhood is hard and it never gets easier. You just have to adapt and face it with full force. Us mammas are here to help you if you need it. Good luck and congratulations.