I've been in love with him for five years and we're finally getting engaged, but he breaks up with me

I chased after Lu Xiangnian's ass for five years and finally waited until he nodded, I cried with joy that day.

Two years later, when we were about to get engaged, he stood me up and sent me a message: [We're not right for each other, let's break up.

Almost at the same time, a strange number sent me a picture of Lu Xiangnian in the hospital with the text, [I had a miscarriage, the baby is Lu Xiangnian's.].

I just turned off my phone in silence, ending my humble relationship once and for all.

The dark clouds were gathering in the sky, and the rain soon pelted the ground with ferocity.

Sitting on the windowsill, looking out the window at the curtain of rain, my mood was inexplicably irritable.

The engagement party between Lu Xiangnian and I was just a week away, but a feeling of unease rose in me, like a vine wrapped around my heart, and I subconsciously covered my heart.

The truth is that a woman's sixth sense is sometimes terribly accurate.

Just half an hour later, I received a WeChat message from Lu Xiangnian.

[Xiaoxiao, we are not suitable, let's break up].

At the same time as this, We Chat message, there was a text message from an unknown number.

[I had a miscarriage, the baby is Lu Xiangnian's]

The text was followed by a screenshot of Lu Xiangnian taking care of her lying in a hospital bed.

On the screenshot, the pain in Lu Xiangnian's eyes stung my eyes.

I turned off my phone and covered my eyes with my hands, my whole mind was blank.

Two

The first time I found myself falling for Lu Xiangnian was in my senior year of high school.

He was the class president and topped the class in every exam. In the world of school dregs, school bullies are unattainable, so I had no previous encounters with him.

It was a habit of mine to dash out of the classroom first thing after class, just to get my favorite sweet and sour pork with fewer people in line.

That day, I slipped and fell, and by the time I reacted, I had tugged on the hand of the person next to me, sending the person next to me stumbling and almost falling over.

While I was still reveling in the fact that I had saved myself from falling with my quick reflexes as a little smart-ass, a cold, helpless voice came from next to me.

[Su Xiaoxiao, let go of your hand]

After reacting with hindsight to what I had done, my face suddenly flushed from my neck to the base of my ears.

[Sorry sorry sorry, I ......]

[It's okay, I'm honored to have spared you]

The voice with a laugh made me tilt my head to look at his face.

The eighteen-year-old Lu Xiangnian was already close to 5'8" and at 6'6" I could only look up at him.

The light coming through the leaves fell sporadically on his body, he was wearing a white shirt and black trousers, his eyes seemed to carry stars, and his smile dispelled my embarrassment and illuminated my heart.

His gentlemanly appearance of the moon between the clouds made my heart beat faster.

He asked me with gentle eyes, [Did you hurt yourself?

I shook my head in a hurry.

[Oh]

He only smiled lightly and continued to walk quickly.

That one glance was the one that completely entered my heart.

Three

Let's meet and talk

I wanted a result in person, even if I knew that this persistence would leave me bruised and battered.

After a long time, there were only three words back.

[No need].

I looked at these three words without warmth and suddenly burst into tears.

The five years of secret love, two years of wholehearted devotion together, only to get two words of no feelings, break up, or a week before the engagement party.

I called his number frantically, and every time I hung up, it finally became [Hello, the number you have called is on hold].

He blacked me out.

I knew, Liu Ranran, that his white moonlight was back, and that Lu Xiangnian was in a very wrong state during this period.

He would often look at me in a daze and would come back drunk.

He would suddenly hug me tightly, and he would cook for me himself.

He didn't use to be like this.

He didn't drink and he always dressed delicately, he didn't cook and he wasn't so close to me.

Everything, from the day Liu Ranran came back, started to change.

It might have been a sign, and I was so caught up in the exhilaration of finally getting something in return that I ignored the rest.

Or perhaps I was fooling myself.

Four

It was always me he liked]

I saw Liu Ran Ran on the fourth day, dressed in a pure white dress. She was as beautiful as ever, with a slim figure and a fair face, her whole person was exquisite from top to bottom, someone who could make all kinds of men swoon over her.

[Su Xiaoxiao, Lu Xiangnian has never forgotten me, and now that I'm back, he won't get engaged to you]

Liu Ran Ran smiled gently, and the two little dimples on her cheeks brought a bit of playfulness and innocence to her smile.

She is still as innocent as ever, even if she is saying and doing disgusting things.

[Even if I had abandoned him, now that I'm back, he'd just be all over me.

Her smile was flamboyant and conspicuous, and in my eyes, those were all mockery of me.

I've been begging for someone for so long, and I've been easily called upon by her to come and go.

[Su Xiaoxiao, thank you for helping me take care of him all these years, now that I'm back, please leave, you don't have to ask for compensation or anything, after all, you did it willingly.]

My anger reached its peak and without saying a word, I threw a cup of boiling milk tea from the table on top of her.

The strawberry-colored milk tea ran down the top of her head, across her cheeks, and into her career line, staining her clean white dress with a messy red.

[Su Xiaoxiao, what are you doing!]

Lu Xiangnian's annoyed voice came from not too far away, and my heart had a momentary twitch.

Look, a dogged scene from inside a dogged novel, late but arriving.

I saw Lu Xiangnian using his white shirt sleeve to wipe Liu Ranran in a panic and saw the heartache and annoyance in his eyes.

I suddenly thought of a word, dog licking.

Lu Xiangnian is Liu Ranran's licking dog, licking until he ends up with nothing.

I was the licking dog of Lu Xiangnian, chasing after him for so many years, but with nothing to show for it.

I knew that Liu Ranran was deliberately provoking me, but could I bear it?

The actual woman can't stand it, so I admit to this splash.

I raised my face proudly and laughed sarcastically, [Can't you see what I'm doing? I'm splashing this mistress.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry Su Xiaoxiao, I didn't mean to ruin your relationship, I ......]

Liu Ran Ran changed like a person, red-eyed, and apologized to me, [I just love Lu Xiangnian too much, I understand that I love him too late, I don't want to give up on him ......]

[You don't have to apologize, let's go]

I'm not sure if it's a good idea to take Liu Ranran's hand and lead him away.

I always watched the two leave with a smile on my face, so I saw with my own eyes the mockery under Liu Ranran's eyes when she looked back, the shout of a victor.

Lu Xiangnian, on the other hand, didn't even look back.

I smiled faintly, and lo and behold, this was the man I had loved for so many years.

Su Xiaoxiao, you are so blind.

Five

I had a crush on him for five years, from my senior year of high school to my graduation from university, a full five years.

How unforgettable is first love?

I still remember that after that one glance into my heart, my eyes began to follow him from time to time.

Knowing that he was a day student, I memorized the time he came to school for morning study and went to the school gate every day to wait for him.

When I saw his figure in the dim light at the main entrance, the corners of my mouth would always rise unconsciously.

Then I would follow behind him, walking slowly and comfortably, watching the long shadows on the ground sometimes separating and sometimes overlapping, and I would imagine that it was the two of us walking hand in hand, side by side, and my heart would be sweet with self-consciousness.

In my eyes, where he was, was always as gorgeous as a stage, and he was always unforgettable on it.

After a while, I found out that his personality was not very sunny, but rather cold.

I couldn't help but feel happy that he was smiling gently to make me feel less embarrassed when he almost fell over, right?

It was for my sake, wasn't it?

So he was treating me differently, right?

I secretly put thousands of times the filter on his behbehaviormagining him to be a wonderfully gentle and considerate man and carved him into my heart so deeply that I couldn't peel it off.

Whenever there was fruit in the house, I would bring it over and stuff it in his drawer.

Sometimes I would even buy breakfast early in the morning and put it in his drawer when no one was looking.

I would look at him in class and after class, but instead, I would hide my little thoughts and not dare to look at him whenever I was near him.

I would accumulate questions I didn't know, pretend to go to him as if nothing was wrong, and then just listen to the sound of his lecture, smell the cool air with his scent, and occasionally rest my eyes on the deadpan side of his good-looking face.

So that he wouldn't know I was distracted, I only let him talk about each question once before I said I understood it.

In reality, I didn't listen at all.

Later, I passed him the note, which contained four simple words.

[I like you].

Without exception, the note sank in stone.

I went from anxious at first, to too terrified and confused, and then too embarrassed.

He'll think I'm not a good girl, right?

He would think that my behavior was affecting his studies, wouldn't he?

He would laugh at my lack of self-esteem, wouldn't he?

After all, I'm a school dropout and he's a school bully.

Would he tell anyone that I had confessed to him?

That day, I looked at everyone and felt that they were looking at me with strange eyes, so I skipped class.

In the evening, I finally got a reply from him, saying that it was the sprint stage and he wanted to study hard.

It was very polite, but in no way detracted from the rejection.

I felt a sense of relief that the dust had settled and that rejection was better than a note sinking into the sea.

I still kept an eye on him and gave him good food, but I didn't bother him anymore.

In the end, he got into a very good university and I got into an average one, but I decided to go to the same city for the sake of my heart.

I breathed the air of the same city as him and could go to his school to see him when I missed him, so much so that the library of his school became a place where I often stepped in.

Six

After splashing Liu Ranran at the cafe, I finally called my mother and told her that the engagement party was cancelled.

My mum didn't have any other reaction, she just said that home is always there and that she would come back when it got hard.

My parents have never been happy with the marriage.

[Xiaoxiao, are you sure you want to marry him?

[Well, mum, I like him, I feel like I'm the happiest person in the world with him.]

My mum just hugged me.

[Girls who marry love are not necessarily nourished by it. Xiaoxiao, you will find that when love becomes the firewood and salt of life, all your fantasies with good intentions will disappear.

I know this, countless people have told me this.

Love and marriage are two different things, but after seven years of obsessive love for him, you can't just give it up.

At that time, to give up was like gutting and stirring.

I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to get a good deal on this.

[Mom could feel that your love was not equal, that he wasn't as devoted to you].

I just smiled.

I was confident that I could warm his heart.

The truth is, if your heart is not in your body, you can't warm it up if you try hard enough.

If you don't listen to the old man, you will suffer.

Seven

I finally met Lu Xiangnian the next day.

When he came back, I was hugging a pink piggyback pillow and lingering on the sofa.

The lights weren't on because I suddenly didn't like the light anymore and I wanted to immerse myself in the darkness and become one with it.

This was our wedding room, he had bought it six months ago, and at that time I was full of hope decorating every part of this house, the little details were a sign of my love for him.

The door was opened, I didn't move, the light turned on, I was stung in the eyes and turned my head to look at him.

[What are you doing here?] He was visibly stunned, and the complexity under his eyes swallowed him up like a whirlpool.

I turned my face away from him indifferently.

He hesitated for a long time, but came over and sat next to me.

The scent of jasmine enters my nose and my stomach turns over.

Jasmine was Liu Ranran's favorite perfume scent.

They'd been together all this time, how else could it smell so strong?

So dirty, I suddenly thought.

Not wanting to stay in a space that smelled like this, I got up indifferently and went to my room, locking the door behind me.

But how could I sleep?

I built this home together with Lu Xiangnian.

We chose the curtains together, we bought the bed together, we bought the sofa together, and even the tiles and wooden flooring were all chosen by me specifically according to his favorite colors.

It was all the same, hands-on.

Now that we've broken up, he wants me to move out, right?

I expected Lu Xiangnian to knock on the door to give me an explanation, but soon there was the sound of the door opening and closing and he was out.

It wasn't long before I received another message from that number on my phone, a picture of Lu Xiangnian wrapped in a bath towel.

He had gone to the hotel, and Liu Ranran had sent it over, what were they about to do, how could I not know?

My heart ached and my tears flowed down my face, winding into a river and wetting my favorite pillow.

That's how unproductive I was.

He had already said goodbye, and I was still in the room where we had once been married, seeing things, thinking about things, dwelling on the illusory sweetness of the past, and abusing myself over and over again.

The moon was as cool as water, spilling a silvery light through the window screen, and I stared blankly outside, suddenly wondering what the point of going on like this was.

Eight

I finally decided to talk to Lu Xiangnian.

So I went to Lu Xiangnian's company. He was a senior executive in the company, and everyone called him Mr. Lu, and the company was very big and grand.

The front desk knew me because I often came to give him a love meal when Lu Xiangnian worked overtime, and at that time the front desk was envious, saying that I was so good that Mr. Lu would not let me down.

And now ......

When the receptionist saw me, there was a moment of surprise in her eyes, followed by a cloth of sympathy.

I quickly reacted to the fact that Liu Ranran was now in the company.

[Xu beauty, help me open the gate]

I was carrying a delicate love meal in my hand, a smile on my face as if nothing had happened.

I made the love meal this morning, and I don't even know what kind of psychology it was done out of, in a trance.

The receptionist's eyes were more sympathetic and even tinged with pity.

[Sister Xiaoxiao, Mr. Lu is not here today]

See, an unrelated stranger knows how to pity me, but Lu Xiangnian doesn't.

I smiled, [He said he would be working late at the office today].

Before the receptionist could say anything else, Liu Ranran walked out of the lift wearing a delicate tight dress, along with a suited Lu Xiangnian.

They were arm in arm, both looking at each other, smiling, tenderly as if this was not a public occasion.

He had never looked at me like that before and rarely smiled so easily.

My heart suddenly clenched, and at that moment, I suddenly understood that Lu Xiangnian had never actually been happy with me.

And I, not only was I the poor spare tire or Liu Ranran's stand-in, all those good things he did for me were