Things we do for family

I was living in San Francisco, I had a job. I was humbled with a place to call home and on top of it I got to bring my dog to work, and on the weekends we go on hikes and road trips, I was living life to the fullest and couldn’t complain. My background is complicated. It's a life no one can really comprehend and even if I don’t want to admit it my background will always be with me wherever I go. I am married but once upon a time I had to flee for my life it was no fun no jk the abuse got to much for me, 6 months later he kills a drug dealer, yes he was battling mental health issues but that drug dealer could of been me, so I am blessed to still be here today and he is serving life in prison 45 years. I am still married to him because I feel I need to be there for my mother in law who is devastated that her son committed murder 1st degree. Because once I break the tie with a divorce she will no longer be family and as long as she needs me I will be here for her as I am truly devastated that my marriage ended up so chaotic as he was my one and only true love. I have not been in a relationship for 16 years and I'm turning 42 this year. It's kind of sad, but in my upbringing I was taught to care for others and that I wasn’t as important as long as other people who needed me were happy. So that’s my complicated background and even if I was couple of states over I always kept in touch with my mother in law, but the older she got she has come to a point where she needs family in her life or she will end it, of course it’s not something she says but it’s the actions she has taken in the past that worries me so how can I be there for her if she needs more than a phone call? That is when I decided the best course of action was to go on leave at my job but didn’t qualify so got fired instead. So me and my dog moved from the west to midwest and it’s scary because the west Bay area only has 3 seasons no snow, and it’s been 10 years since I experienced a cold snowy winter and it scares me to because when in a earthquake you can protect yourself, but here in midwest if there’s a tornado I have nowhere to go nowhere to protect myself from it and that scares the life out of me. On top of that my body can’t handle the cold. I become easily immobilized so it’s harder for me to function but I am here because of my family, mother in law needs me. So, the things we do for our family like picking up moving half way cross country it’s okay because at the end of the day I know it’s temporary. When I know she is good I can move back to the west. Point with this article is to share with you that you are not alone, because the things we do for love and family for us it’s worth it as it’s feeding our hearts with good. And even if we may not like the hassle or complication we can always remind ourselves that it’s just temporary. If we are young we have a whole life to live while our elders may not have that long as we do. If I can make someone's day I will and family is everything regardless of your situation.