Teenage me

"One thing I wish I was ever told while growing up as a child was that teenage life was actually the hardest process one would pass through in life, especially when you have just a few people by your side and everything you do just seems perfect in your eyes.

My mystery began when I started high school in the year 2014. My whole life literally looked like a movie. I was alone in my own world, no friends to share my problems with, no shoulder to cry on. I became a problem to myself, a threat to myself at a very young age. My grades weren't helping at all. I was just living like a living corpse. The few friends I had weren't the real ones, even if I knew they never meant well for me. I still had no choice but to mingle with them. That was how my life continued until my last year as a junior high school student. I started relating with a lot more people... I even got a boyfriend at the process. It was really good, but I wasn't really comfortable with it at all. It was just as if I was being forced to go into a relationship, so it never actually lasted. I dated the guy for a few months, and everything ended, but we were still friends to date. We still check up on each other, though I have dated two guys after I broke up with him.

My friendship with people grew more and more. I made a lot of friends, and I was so glad I did. Life was lonely as hell. After my junior high school year, I graduated and furthered for my senior year immediately. This was actually more fun than ever. I wanted my senior year to be a remarkable one, the school life I would never forget. So, I decided to tell my parents to move me to a boarding school in the same school, by the way. Moving to the boarding house at first was a struggle. I felt it wasn't my kind of place and was looking for all means to fit in.

Weeks passed, and I eventually made friends with both my juniors and seniors from the hostel. I became familiar with a few people. It was really a small happy moment and one of the best I spent in my times spent in boarding school. It started going smoothly until one of my seniors decided to set me up with one of his classmates. He was actually the hottest in his class, no cap, and I think I liked him then, though I didn't fall for him first. He made the first move, and I just put in with the flow.

It's crazy how I was warned not to get into a relationship with him, but I never listened. I was so naive, and my adolescence was just fooling me around. Little did I know they made a bet on him winning my heart without my notice. I came to know about it after he graduated, and he never actually argued about it when I confronted him. We continued dating, though, 'cos I so much loved him and was planning the future with him. This guy tossed real hard with my emotions few months after he left school. I never heard from him again. It was as if I was the one forcing myself on him. I was the one pushing and trying to make the relationship work. Truth be told, if I had the opportunity to go back in time, I wouldn't have allowed my teenage drama to get hold of me. Each day I regret each moment I accepted the lies he fed me with. I regretted the moments I accepted his numerous apologies honestly.

I learnt my lesson the hard way as a teenager. All this lovely story happened when I was fourteen. I went into depression for two good years, waiting for this guy to apologise for what he did but it never happened.
My high school experience was a rollercoaster ride, filled with ups and downs, joy, and pain. Looking back, I realize that I was not prepared for the challenges that came with being a teenager. I struggled to fit in, make friends, and deal with the pressures of academics and relationships.

During my junior high school year, I felt alone, with no friends to share my problems with or to lean on. My grades were suffering, and I felt like a living corpse. The few friends I had were not genuine, and I knew they did not have my best interests at heart. Despite this, I continued to hang out with them, just to avoid being alone.

However, during my senior year, things started looking up. I made new friends, and my social circle grew. I even got into a relationship, but it was short-lived, and I did not feel comfortable in it. Despite this, we remained friends.

Moving to the boarding house was a new experience, and at first, I struggled to fit in. However, I eventually made friends and had some of the best times of my high school life. Unfortunately, I fell into a trap set up by a senior who introduced me to a classmate of his. I later found out that they had made a bet on whether he could win my heart or not.

I fell hard for him, but the relationship was not what it seemed. He played with my emotions, and it ended a few months after he graduated. I was devastated and fell into depression for two years, waiting for him to come back and apologize. He never did.

Looking back, I realize that I allowed myself to be swept up in the drama of teenage relationships. I regret accepting his lies and apologies and wish I had listened to the warnings about him. I learned the hard way that not everyone has good intentions, and some people will play with your heart for their amusement.

Today, I find it hard to trust people and have a serious relationship. I worry that someone will hurt me again, and I will fall into the same trap. However, I know that with time and patience, I will find someone who deserves my trust and love.