Regrets?

This is a story about how Nicole Laurent fucked up her life (with a commercial voice). No, just kidding this is just a story about how she´s a joke for life.

Let me first introduce you to Nicole Laurent. Nicole is a Musical Theatre artist, she´s the kindest soul you will ever meet, her heart is big, she´s unstoppable, gorgeous and when she´s on stage her performances are always sharp and flawless. Yeah! That´s me.

However, sometimes when she´s off stage, the universe is not that nice to her. For example, this time when she was in Plymouth, England. She was in a store, buying a bracelet, and thought that one of the employees was cute. She started talking in Spanish to her friend about how cute he was, his ass and how she wanted to, you know, do everything to him. All of the sudden HE (the handsome employee) said in Spanish: -I speak Spanish, my parents are from spain. Really? I´ve never done something like that in my entire life and the first time I do, he can understand what I´m saying.

Thank god he thought I was funny and cute so he invited me for a date in which, if I´m not mistaken I think I drank too much, the bar closed and I needed to go to the bathroom before going home and since I couldn´t, I peed my pants. This is no joke, Nicole was on her way home and she couldn´t hold it anymore. She was in the elevator almost in front of her apartment and it just happened, there was no way to stop it. So she ran, took a bath and when she came back to clean it, someone had already done it. So embarrassing! Those security cameras have it all. But that´s not it, Nicole´s relationships have bad records, as you can see. Something always happens on these dates, but there´s this one time that it just keeps playing, again and again in her head.

Nicole met this guy on Tinder (you know what tinder is so don´t give me that look). He was this photographer, handsome guy, nice outfits, nice body, nice face, everything check check check check check. That night they went out for dinner, later on, they head off to a bar to dance and then to his apartment. She was decided to give it all that day, it has been a long time, the river was dry so don´t even get me started. They got to the apartment, he happens to know how to play guitar so they spent a couple of minutes singing and then real shit started happening. He started kissing and touching, her heart was flushing, pounding, wow. He pulls her to the bed aggressively (you like it huh?) and then the universe said ¨oh no baby, no today satan¨. There was a carpet and she stumbled with it, fucking and by the way the horrible carpet and like in slow motion while seeing her whole romantic life passing in front of her eyes, she fell… with her knee… on his balls (yeah! those), his testicles didn´t survive that day.

That´s me, Nicole Laurent, all of this is true and I know the universe may be a bitch sometimes but I love it, it gives me great stories to tell.

Thank you for reading this, I hope you liked it, and don´t forget to scroll down and send me a gift so I can continue telling my adventures.

Love,

Niki