Ron Kretschmer
Bio
Ron is a published writer, illustrator, and teacher. from Tacoma, WA. He recently lost his wife of 27 years to health complications related to Covid-19. Together they had 3 children. Ron enjoys writing, painting, sports, and movies.
Stories (15/0)
Who Can Tell if Your Date Went Well
I just started dating again for the first time in the 21st century. It was great. I nailed it. Could not have been more charming if I was spritzed with charm dust. It is safe to say that I haven't lost my touch over the years. That's what I felt. I just don't know how she felt about the whole dating experience with me. Her assessment of the evening might not align with my glowing review of my dating skills, but how would I know? There are articles online about signs that your date went well, but we need is an article about knowing if your date was less awesome than it could have been. Like dinner last night, I have that covered. See what I mean about the charm?
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Humans
Of 2 Minds
Joe opened his postal box. His mother paid for the postal box because she thought the mail would get stolen in Joe's terrible neighborhood. After all, whenever she was there at Joe's intimate shack, she never saw any envelopes lying around. It was as if nobody wrote letters anymore, which is preposterous, so her conclusion was that there was a land pirate absconding with Joe's parcels. There wasn't. The volume of mail he received in the P.O. box was more or less the same as he had been getting. This time though, there was a brown paper package sitting diagonally in the upright space, and it appeared not to have been sent by his mother.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Fiction
What Really Happened to D.B. Cooper
On November 24, 1971, an unknown man hijacked a plane headed from Portland, Oregon to Seattle, Washington. He demanded $200,000 and 4 parachutes, which he received in Seattle. He then instructed the pilots to take off again, this time towards Mexico. Shortly thereafter, he leapt out of the back of the plane and into pop culture lore.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Criminal
Our Messed Up Pets
Edgar was our family's second cat. The first cat, Dopey, was still around and trying to get used to sharing the house with a toddler and another cat. Edgar was easy going enough that those things never really mattered, as he regarded the hissing fits with calm ignorance. He was a lover, not a fighter. Everyone was his person. As aggressively antisocial as Dopey was, that is how dedicated Edgar was to spreading warm feelings to all of God's creatures. In time, that would become a problem.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Petlife
Our Messed Up Pets
Not long after we adopted the poodle, Sugar, my younger daughter had a Labradoodle generously given to her by another family in 4-H. Honey had been the runt of the litter and had some hip and leg problems, but he was absolutely amazing. It was the second time that my daughter had happened upon a pet that was practically perfect for her. Sugar also became chummy with the new guy. They developed a 'Bert and Ernie' type friendship that lasted for over a decade.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Petlife
Our Messed Up Pets
After the first 2 parts of this series covered cats, this one has to do with a poodle named Sugar. My oldest daughter had wanted a dog for quite a while, but her mother was not skeptical and her father was passionately against it. Her saving grace was that her grandmother wanted her to have a dog so she could do 4-H with her aunt and uncle. And so, we adopted Sugar.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Petlife
Our Messed Up Pets
My wife and I were married for 27 years and together we raised 3 wonderful kids. She passed away about 6 months ago, after a long battle with an autoimmune disease made complicated by Covid. As what would have been our 28th anniversary approaches, and I am getting ready to sell the house we lived in for so many years, I was thinking about the great memories that were born here. A lot of those memories involve the odd dogs and cats that come through here. I won't hit every single one in this series, but the ones that make the list are worth the read. If you want a preview, consider the photo of Moby as evidence that we nurtured some weird animals.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Petlife
Our Messed Up Pets
Part 1 told of a cat with unresolved anger issues and severe separation anxiety. In Part 2, I will tell of an orange tabby named, Happy, who was almost nothing like Dopey. When my middle child was turning 3, she received the little guy for her birthday. She had medical challenges that were manageable, but still a lot for her and the family, and Happy seemed to understand that dynamic from the very first day. The 2 of them were almost inseparable, as if conjoined by fate.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Petlife
I'm Going With You!
The curtain on the third act rises. We now know all the players, the plot, and the stakes. It's time for the climatic battle to commence, so the hero dons their battle gear and begins a journey that will define their legacy. Then, the un-enhanced civilian, who has been either a messenger or victim to this point, announces that they are going also. The hero says it's too dangerous; you're too close to this; you're too injured; you're too emotional; this is not your fight; you can only speak to fish. Why bother? Everyone who has ever watched a movie or a television show, or read a comic book, or has seen a musical stage production of Spider-man already knows this contrived conflict has no legs. They will be coming.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Geeks
Should You Go League or Sidekick?
After a few years of cleaning up the streets of whatever town you've been patrolling as a volunteer crime fighter, you might feel like branching out, networking, or giving back to the community. Good for you. It's important to keep growing as a vigilante. There are a few things about this personal growth you do need to consider before you commit to something grander than the life you are already living the heck out of.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Geeks
Does This Cape Make Me Look Vulnerable?
An animated, fashion icon once told her incredible client that she does not do capes...darling. At best, the superhero cape is window dressing. If a cape could help you fly, then you'd see birds wearing them. If it made you faster, then you'd see cheetahs wearing them (or maybe the animals that a cheetah chases). Sometimes, wearable items like capes become part of the fashion even though they have no utility whatsoever, like silk ties and shoulder pads. A good case could be made that you want to say no to the cape if you are seriously contemplating a run at the whole superhero thing.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Geeks
Keeping Your Secret Identity From Loved Ones?
At some point along the way of the crime fighter, the custodial aunt has to find out that the skinny nerd that’s been living under their roof is actually doing battle with thieves and murderers while wearing long underwear. There will be feelings of fear, betrayal, guilt, anger, and such. Then, inevitably, the enhanced human crime fighter will explain that they kept the secret from their loving family in order to keep them safe. If they had known about the super side hustle going on every night, they could have been put in terrible danger! But wait, does that make any sense at all? Family members and girlfriends seem to buy into that questionable explanation without thinking too hard about it, but it actually is truly comic hogwash.
By Ron Kretschmer3 years ago in Geeks
