Part XI : Memorable Moments that Could Only Happen in Plattsburgh

So one year after break, Tim and Steve got back to Plattsburgh first, and since there wasn’t anyone to commiserate with yet, some kind of playdate seemed in order. Pointing their antennas up, the duo decided to embark on a jaunt to Willsboro and allay the loneliness. That’s where Tony’s family owned the North Inn.

Of course, the lack of a car would not dissuade and cab fair had to be sacrificed in favor of the essential carry on luggage - beer. Therefore, with the beverages in tow, the duo got themselves to the highway and as they were trying to hitch, tried to be deft about their cargo when stopped by the cops. “Thinking we were being smart, we ditched the beer,” remembered Steve.

Beer lives not mattering, Steve and Tim were summoned for hitchhiking and littering and received a one way ticket back to Exit 37. So set back, the fellow travelers put their small heads together and resolved to complete their mission. “Tim and I conferred, and being of sound, mature 19 year old minds, decided that our holy endeavor would not be denied.  We were going to the North Inn. However, we would be respectful this time. We would stay off the highway, and we wouldn’t litter,” recalled Steve. 

At the southbound entry ramp to the Northway, karma had fate pulling up from the rear. “A pick up truck or SUV pulled over, and we jumped right in,” said Steve.

The driver wasn’t going all the way, but he promised to get them within knocking distance of the town. Still, Steve and Tim saw the opportunity, and endeavored to make up for all the time lost to the legal complexities.

So the boys literally pushed the envelope. “I don’t recall who started what came next, but if you were there, you would have thought Tim and I rehearsed the skit for weeks.  Also, had the Motion Picture Academy of Arts and Sciences been present, Tim would have a gold statue on the mantle above his fireplace,” joked Steve.

The source of the ensuing performance was easy to find. “I want to be in the North Inn getting drunk,” Steve reasserted the sentiment, and it began with a question. “Why are you headed to Willsboro,” asked the good Samaritan behind the wheel.

Like Redford and Newman, Boogie and Bergman (or Abbott and Costello), the pseudo thespians synched up and played off each other to a tee. Thus, Tim recoiled, and Steve gave voice to the audible whimper of his co-star. “Tim’s uncle, who he was close with, had passed away,” Steve assured the grief.

No chance for doubt, the lie became legend as the two doubled down. “Tim’s whimpers increased to sobs, and intermittently, he shared a few words about his dear departed uncle,” Steve recounted.

So moved was the driver that he drove them all the way to Willsboro. But as the North Inn came into range, Tim and Steve could no longer hold back. “This is close enough, you can let us out here,” the excited words came across in stereo.

Their eyes now way bigger than their taste buds, a last glance back at the chauffeur revealed a distinct displeasure. “He was onto us,” beamed Steve. “The little bubble above his head now read - Dickheads.”

The revelry began and the details… Well, what ground haven’t we covered yet. The night eventually gave way to court the next day, and despite having no money, the funds some how materialized. “My guess is Derry gave me the money. He was very helpful to my survival for several years, and I am forever grateful,” Steve concluded, and that sounds about right.

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