#metoo
You are not alone. Together we can de-stigmatize speaking out about our experiences with sexual harassment, assault, and more.
Til it Happens to You
I didn't say yes. But I didn't say no. After, we were at church. I stood while we sang. And I cried. I wasn't crying because I was moved by the spirit. I was crying because I was 14 and had just performed the first sexual act of my life.
The Day That Changed Me Forever
Hello, my name is Jordan Dale and I am a 21 year old college senior. Life didn't used to be easy, but then one day I decided that I was going to turn my opinion about myself around and point it in the direction of success and growth. I just want to start out by saying that when this situation in my life occurred, I was what you would consider a typical teenager. I was young and naive and thought I was invincible and that nothing would destroy me. I will always remember what happened to me, but now as I have gotten older, instead of letting it suffocate me, I have decided to let it help me grow and change my future. This was a time in my life when I was very insecure about many things and I did not know the difference between right and wrong. Well now as I have grown up, I want to tell my story to help anyone and everyone I can reach to tell them that the sun does rise again and it will get better. I am bigger than my story, so let me put into words what happened.
Jordan DalePublished 6 years ago in Viva#MeToo Isn't Enough
#MeToo Isn’t Enough. On October 5, 2017, the New York Times published a story about decades of allegations against a powerful Hollywood producer, Harvey Weinstein. Some of the accusations included women stating that they were forced to massage him and watch him while he was nude. If that wasn’t bad enough, he also offered to advance Hollywood careers in exchange for sexual behaviors. The victims include Rose McGowan and Ashley Judd. On the same day that this story broke, Weinstein issued the following paraphrased apology:
Eadlyen GreenwoodPublished 6 years ago in VivaThe Subject Taking Over the Media Right Now...Consent
All I hear about on the news right now is this person got accused of sexual misconduct or this person got fired for allegations of misconduct and we have all seen the #metoo all over social media. One thing I have not heard much about with this uproar is when consent needs to be applied. The answer is always! It doesn't matter if you have known a person for years, or you just met them or if you're in a relationship with this person or even if you're married to them, consent needs to be given every time, no matter what.
Zinnia CosmoPublished 6 years ago in Viva#MeToo
It all started when I was 16 and I met a boy. He was sweet at first. I met him just after my 16th birthday on a school trip. He was kind enough to give me his sweater when I was cold, even if that meant he was in a t-shirt. He was always like this.
Does He Really Hear Me?
Fourteen and innocent, life was never easy. From raising my younger brother, to managing bills, dinner, and basically any wifely/motherly duties, life for me as a 14-year-old girl was from far from average. Being raised in a "God fearing" family I knew in my mind that the way I lived wasn't normal, or right. But still I said nothing. His voice in my mind with that heart wrenching threat that I swore at the time I would take to the grave. Everyone around me could see the issues but wouldn't dare ask questions because they too feared what might come from questioning his "intentions."
Whitney OwensPublished 6 years ago in Viva- Top Story - November 2017
We Need to Face Uncomfortable Truths
Dear Male Reader, I have a question for you: Why do you hate me? Sometimes I feel like everyone hates me because they keep saying it was my fault. My fault for having decided to go out alone, or my fault for the length of the skirt I decided to wear, or even my fault for that one too many drinks I had. The blame is even worse if what happened to me was done by my intimate partner (being him a boyfriend or a husband). That's due to this weird "common sense" understanding that if I agreed to be in a relationship with that man, I automatically deserve everything that comes out of it, after all, it was my choice. Please, I can't understand, why do you hate me? Why am I to blame if it I wasn't the one to perpetrate the assault? Just stop and reflect for a moment, how can it be my choice to be sexually violated? My choices regarding personal fashion, alcohol consumption habits, and social circles are not synonymous with choosing to be harassed. No one ever put that power in my hands. But you male reader, like to put the fault on my shoulders when the ugly truth is that the only choice that mattered on the occasion of the violence I suffered was that of the man who did it. He was the only one who chose when and how would he abuse me. And I'm sorry to say it male reader, but you are the one who gave him that power. Because you as a part of our current social structure constantly reinforce that I, as a woman, am the frail sex but contradictorily you lash out with so much judgment when I am weak and vulnerable. Isn't that exactly how you want me to be? The damsel in distress is the role that is forced upon me. You must understand that even though it's very entertaining to play as the male hero in a video game going on a quest to save the princess, this brings the exact opposite of safety to real women. Because malicious men take advantage of our vulnerability, being it emotional or physical, to say an extremely invasive and inconvenient comment about our bodies, to grab our butts at a party, to decoy us of a cab ride home once we're tipsy, to shove us into a dark corner, to force us into unwanted sexual acts in our own homes. And they feel like they have the authority to do all these dreadful things because our pop culture is unceasingly putting us in a role of utmost submission. We DID NOT choose for such things to happen to us! So I ask you: why has the word "molested" become synonymous to "dirty"? Why is it me that has to live in shame with the label "raped" stamped on my forehead, when no one even mentions my aggressor? Moreover, why do you never allow me to speak about it? You need to stop taking away my voice because sexual violence is a very real social problem. I guarantee it has happened to someone close to you, dear male reader, maybe to a friend, a work colleague, a sister, cousin or aunt, maybe even to your own mother or wife, but you don't know about it because this woman lives mortified in the shame that you put on her, to the point that she doesn't dare speak up about what happened to her.
Lena MarquesPublished 6 years ago in Viva 7 Things to Never Say to a Survivor of Sexual Assault
1. "I'm not like him/her." We know, or at least we think we know. If we thought you were, you wouldn't be having the opportunity to tell us you aren't. However, there is always a part of us wondering if you are like them, if you're exactly like the predator that transformed us into what the rest of society deems as "victims." If you're really not like them, don't say you're not, show us you're not.
Kimberly DuffPublished 6 years ago in VivaMe Too
Just today, I read a story that a woman had written about her experience with sexual abuse. It was titled "Me too." After reading her story, I felt that I owed it to myself to come clean about some of the things that I went through as a child. I hope that sharing my story will encourage others to do the same.
Taneka SkyPublished 6 years ago in Viva#MeToo
In 7th grade I took the bus home from school everyday and I was one of the few girls that lived in the neighborhood. One afternoon this boy sat with me, I had my headphones in and tried to ignore him until he started touching my thighs. He said it was a "game" that they play, and you're supposed to let the guys touch you until you get "nervous". Yet, every time I would tell him to stop, he didn't.
Maria RosePublished 6 years ago in VivaDear Stranger, I Don't Care If You Call My Daughter "Him"
People have called my daughter a boy even when she’s wearing pink shoes and a pink shirt. Has it ever bothered me? Not a tiny little bit.
Justine SheppardPublished 6 years ago in VivaSpeaking Out About What Needs to Be Spoken About
My first encounter with sexual abuse was when I was 8. It lasted for a year. Not just by one person, but 3. I won't name any names at all. However, I also wasn't the only one it was being done to either.
Kirsten Wills-AshlockPublished 6 years ago in Viva