Self growth is a little bit like a castle.

I love visiting castles.

They stand so grand, so beautiful, so strong! Even visiting ruins of castles, when you walk around their fallen stone, you can imagine how it must have been to walk through those halls and those passageways hundreds of years ago, what a sight it must have been. You know that something strong was there, that lasted hundreds of years. Left it's mark on countless generations in one way or another.

I love looking at castles. I love their design. I love exploring the winding towers leading up to oddly shaped rooms which I always wonder practical things like, "how do they get the furniture up here, up all these winding staircases" (They are probably built within the bedroom walls I presume- like some 14 century Ikea Flatpack) and "this is not a practical room for a pregnant woman or for babies and small toddlers to be in!" (Neither women or children would have been a primary thought for a design in castles, I am completely aware!) - But knowing that, how completely impractical they are as homes to live in, I just can't help but love them and love being in them, fascinating over all about the events which could have happened within, all the stories. I think about it and come to a conclusion in myself that no matter how beautiful they are, and how strong they are, and how they generally stand the test of time, (and lastly not to disregard my fictional romantic ideas of castles), castles probably do have more stories of struggle and suffering than of happiness and pleasure.

Sometimes I see posts online saying things like "The person you were 5 years ago would be so proud of how you've grown", these kind of posts do speak truth but leave me a bit puzzled when it comes to the emotions I attach to how I got here. I want to believe in and support that post fully, but I just cannot always give complete thanks or feel at sincere peace to the set of events which have had to lead me to my growth of today.

I visualise my growth rather like a castle. Many castles over the years get knocked down, sometimes crumbling away slowly, over hundreds of years, by the weather battering at their stone. Sometimes suddenly and abruptly, by war and conflict. Sometimes just because the occupants have decided that the style of the time has changed and want to design their home that represents the period they are in.

So parts of the castle are rebuilt. Knocked down and rebuilt. Some castles you can wander through and see different eras of history within their walls.

When they are rebuilt, they are generally built up stronger and in a new design. This is a bit like how we are also. When life has been hard on us, and there are times we don't think we are going to cope through this, we get knocked down to the dust. But slowly and surely, overtime, we find ways to build ourselves back up strong. We shed parts of ourselves to be able to transform into something new. Our outer-walls are reinforced with harder stone to protect the core of the castle. Our gatehouse and portcullis is quicker to react to threat through experience of past events. Our winding towers reach higher towards the skies. And, our Great-Keep is a grander spectacle to be in, sharing in the wisdom and reflections of past experience.

Sometimes we come out of it not even looking like the original design of the castle, but it is still there, the old solid parts, standing in cohesion alongside the rebuilt new solid parts.

Self-growth is never an easy thing to go through. It is however something all humans go through through, whether it be on a small level or a greater level.

I hope that the self growth that each of you go through, stays strong and stands the test of time against the future unknown.