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Life Revelations From A Fanfic

The Struggle for Self-love and Body Positivity

By Natasja RosePublished about a year ago 4 min read
Top Story - April 2025
Life Revelations From A Fanfic
Photo by Elisa Photography on Unsplash

Have you ever been quietly reading, only for a line to jump out and whack you in the face with how profound and relatable it is?

that happened to me a few weeks ago, while reading, of all things, a Harry Potter fanfic.

”Have you considered that you don’t like your appearance because it’s just not what you’re attracted to?”

As someone who has always struggled with self-love and self worth because I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror, this was a life-changing revelation.

My partner tells me that I’m most beautiful when I’m laughing (hence her doing clown dances and pulling silly faces from behind the photographer during a recent photoshoot...), but she's biased. I've had people tell me I look good when I'm dressed up for a special occasion, but I never saw it.

When I looked in the mirror, I saw a too-long face with too-small eyes, and a smile that either looked forced or sinister when I posed for a camera, or showed too many teeth and too much gum when I was genuinely smiling.

The rest of me was the same: too tall, too lanky, curves in all the wrong places, and not enough curves in the right places. I've never looked at myself and been happy with what I saw.

The idea that I only disliked the way I looked was because it didn't suit my personal preferences was actually mind-blowing. It completely changed how I saw myself.

It didn't suddenly make me like my appearence any better, but now I can look in the mirror and instead of being repulsed, I can look at myself objectively.

Even if I don’t consider myself to be physically attractive, I can find things about myself to like, and that makes a huge difference.

"Justice un-tempered by Mercy is called Revenge, and that is a cycle without end."

"I choose to stop it! I say no more! Let the cycle of violence end with me!

These two quotes are from another fanfic, this one in the How To Train Your Dragon (movie) fandom.

The movie itself is an obvious allegory for breaking the cycle of violence and hatred and revenge, but the fanfic in question takes it further, and there are several instances where the main characters might be justified in seeking revenge for wrongs done, but it is explicitly framed as the wrong thing to do.

There is also an explicit contrast drawn between passing judgement so harsh that it’s revenge in all but name, judgement that is within the letter of the law but falls short of being called justice, and judgement where mercy for a wrong done in ignorance is emphasised.

With all that is happening in the world right now, with the emphasis on punishment to the fullest extent possible, regardless of presumed innocence or degree of culpability, that message feels particularly important.

In an ideal world, all crime would be simple and uncomplicated, all judgement black and white, good vs bad.

But reality is not an ideal. People are deceived, innocents framed to take the fall for crimes they didn’t commit, or committed out of ignorance, and it is not Justice to punish the innocent or ignorant as if they had acted out of malice.

For Justice to be truly Just, it must include Mercy and the chance for Rehabilitation, not merely punishment for the crime.

Sometimes that feels insufficent for the victims of the crime. Sometimes it is, and sometimes the guilty go free because of lack of evidence.

”It is better that one hundred guilty go free, than that one innocent is wrongly condemned.”

That’s another quote from the same fanfic. It argues that it is better for the guilty to be insufficienly punished under the law, than for an innocent person to be wrongfully executed under the same law.

Perhaps it will not seem like it at the time, in the heat of pain and anger at perceived injustice, when someone feels like the Law and Courts have failed them when it should have protected them. But Law exists to protect the innocent as much as it exists to punish the guilty, and part of that is things like Presumption of Innocence, Burdan of Proof, and Due Process For All.

Yes, all. Even the immigrants and criminals and people who don’t look like you.

The Law is constantly changing and evolving as new laws are made and changed and precedents are set with Court rulings. Not all of those changes are intentional or deliberate. That’s why the process for creating or changing laws is so complicated; so that people can point out the unintended side effects, and do their best to point out the loopholes that could be explouted by those with I’ll intent.

The Process of Law is not foolproof. Mistakes can be made, loopholes overlooked until someone uses them to wiggle out of consequence. Bad laws can be pushed through without enough scrutiny as to the probable consequences. Good laws can be abused, or not reach as far as they should.

Times change, and some laws are no longer applicable as they once were. Some laws were never as applicable as they should have been, and need updating.

People are falliable, and sometimes the System fails as a result. That means trying to fix it, not that the System of Law should be thrown out entirely.

All we can do is keep trying in the pursuit of Justice, to keep striving for that ideal that we may never quite reach, but should always aim for.

”You try and you fail, but the only true failure is when you stop trying.”

As long as you’re still trying, there is still hope of success. The moment you give up - not paused to try again later, but give up and declare that you’re done trying - you’ve failed for good.

If you enjoyed this story, please leave a heart and a comment, and check out my other stuff on Amazon.

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About the Creator

Natasja Rose

I've been writing since I learned how, but those have been lost and will never see daylight (I hope).

I'm an Indie Author, with 30+ books published.

I live in Sydney, Australia

Follow me on Facebook or Medium if you like my work!

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    Written by Natasja Rose