Illuminating Narcissism

If you’ve been in a relationship with a person who suffers from narcissist personality disorder then more likely than not you’ve experienced the discard stage of the relationship. If you’ve not quite hit that point, please know that this is part of the disorder. They discard because their mentality is always that the grass is always greener on the other side.

They use and abuse their victims. The narcissist that I was dealing with even told me that, boastingly. They are somehow proud of this behavior.

While they are with you they always have their eye out for the next new supply. They are empty souls. Once they feel you can no longer give them the energy they need, they go on to the next victim and so on.

Once they wear you down so much that your energy is depleted, they no longer have a use for you. This is the only reason the discard happens.

I really want to express to you that you are the victim here. Never feel that the reason they discarded you is because of you. They tore you down and will never be there to rebuild what they broke. They look at you as weak now, just like them. It’s like you’re the balloon that was inflating their ego but when they kept poking holes in it, it deflated and now, what good is it?

They want to torment you so deeply that your wounds, just like theirs never heal but the best part of being discarded is the fact that they can’t ever do this to you again. Let them move on, let them walk away because the reality is, the new supply is now the one that’s going to be used and abused. Not you!!

It was never about you not being good enough. It was never about your flaws. It was never about you, period. It’s them! They are empty vessels, they have to have their alter ego filled up to stay afloat.

Even with the new supply, their eyes are wide open, she’s not the last.

If you’ve read part one of this series you’ll really understand what these people are all about. They are completely superficial. They never loved you and they won’t love the new supply either. It’s a vicious cycle.

I never got discarded. He always acted like we were nothing and that his girlfriend was the one he was going to be with forever but if that’s the case. why not just leave me alone and go live happily ever after with her? I’m not sure what he was thinking, if I was supply A, B or C but I knew I wasn’t any, or. I was never going to be an option, please don’t be either!

Trust me, at the point in time where he tried to break me, I was always on my game. He thought he was pulling one over on me but that’s why I let it continue for so long. Just to see what else he was going to say or do. It was funny to me that he thought he was going to break me. He wasn’t, I already knew!

I wasn’t the one, she wasn’t the one, there is no one that is the one for the people with this personality disorder. One, can’t satisfy.

The saying “it’s not you, it’s me”. It’s them! I know that this can be a devastating ordeal for you but just remember that you’re out! You can now begin the healing journey. I always believe that in this lifetime we have lessons to learn and as hard as it can be, these lessons teach us a lot.

This doesn’t mean you’re unlovable, never does it mean that! It just means that you got with someone who doesn’t know how to love and doesn’t know what love is. They can’t even love themselves. They don’t want you to either! You are more than enough and although the words of a narcissist can sting, it doesn’t mean they’re real.

Remember that this is just a part of your story of life. Only one chapter. Not the entire book. You’ll heal. They don’t. They just continue their shady games. Be thankful that it’s not with you any longer. This is a huge weight off your shoulders.

Hearts heal. Souls heal. This is a blessing in disguise. Feel, release and let go. You’re going to blossom from this experience. You’re going to grow and them, well, they’re evolution is stagnant. Life can hurt but once the hurt is over this chapter will be just a far away memory.

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