Gaslighting Can be From Your Own People

by Narleysia Nicolee 18 days ago in advice

Protect Your Mental

Gaslighting Can be From Your Own People
Photo by Nicholas Kusuma on Unsplash

Family and friends can be blood suckers.

Yes, blood suckers.

They can suck the life out of you.

Let me just help you understand or comprehend,

THE WORD TO REMEMBER IS GASLIGHT !

The part of speech for the word is a verb. It is a verb because it means to manipulate someone by doing it mentally and emotionally causing them to question their own sanity. I don't think this word is put into thought or consideration enough at all. I think people forget in a way or in some suspense.

So, can you think about when you ever been gaslighted or the person who was gaslighting someone?

I won't lie, I don't think of myself as a perfect person. Otherwise, I would be lying, right?

I played both parts but I would say that I been gaslighted more than being the gaslighter.

I won't say any names because I'm not that type of person but they know who they are and I won't deny it at all. I don't look at them the same, the relationship isn't the same, but I don't hate anyone.

No one is perfect and not everyone is a hero like you may want to believe or how I wanted to believe. It's just what it is sometimes with people. We have crappy days and may project our emotions to someone we shouldn't. When that happens They have the choice to forgive you or not and it's not really much you can do but try to be better for you eventually others will see your improvement.

Here are some ways to identify a gaslighter:

1. They'll lie. [We all told lies before, probably still do to cover our asses or still try to in a way of attempting to lie. A Gaslighter will do it and you might not notice at all.]

2. Deny they ever said something, even though you have proof. [ I remember this happen to me and I thought to myself was it something wrong with them or me because It was obvious yet overlooked.]

3.Use what is near and dear to you as ammunition. [ Ammunition: considerations that can be used to support one's case or topic. People can be real pussies sometimes they'll use whatever they know you have or want and try to turn it negative to break you and make up with you later. For example Comments can be made like "You don't have anyone." "Your not important and you do nothing" "Your the devil." all over you not doing what they want or being what they expected.

4. Actions do not match their words. [People can say anything, even those close to you. I learned the hard way. Watch out for this and run as soon as you see it for your own eyes.

5.They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you. [ Uh , gosh I know this one. They may offer you love and other stuff they know you wanted or needed to throw you off that they were just treating you awful. They may tell you their issues to coax you that they deserve understanding for their actions. DONT ACCEPT IT IF YOU DONT WANT TO.]

Look here is some effects if you let yourself get gaslighted:

  1. no longer feel like the person you used to be
  2. being more anxious and less confident than usual
  3. often wondering if you’re being too sensitive
  4. feeling like everything you do is wrong
  5. always thinking it’s your fault when things go wrong
  6. apologizing often
  7. having a sense that something’s wrong, but being unable to identify what it is
  8. often questioning whether your response to your partner is appropriate (wondering if you were too unreasonable or not loving enough)
  9. making excuses for your partner’s behavior
  10. avoiding giving information to friends or family members to avoid confrontation about your partner

If this is happening for you right now please talk to someone that you can trust or call an hotline because gaslighting is abuse and it can come from people that you care about but you don't want to hurt them. Yet, you need to know that your health is important every part of it matters for you to be you and happy.

Resources for more understanding:

advice
Narleysia Nicolee
Narleysia Nicolee
Read next: Never In the Cover of Night
Narleysia Nicolee

just another writer telling a story. 💛🧚🏾‍♀️ Did I tell you though I write poetry and have books out? I also prefer brownies over cake.. Anywhosies Thank you and I hope you enjoy my work since you’re here.

Instagram & Twitter: @justnarleyy

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