Don’t Wait Until the End to Wake Up to Your Life

My friend recently passed away.

I saw him for a few hours before he died. He stood in my office as he had done many times before to greet me. I saw him go through different challenges and come out better. His health was good, and the future looked bright. And I was happy for him because he had worked so hard to get to this place.

My friend died that night in a serious accident.

I was shocked. Why him? Why now when he had so much to live for?

As I grieved and grieved over this sudden loss, I remembered the gift of life and the few precious moments we had.

I hope these reminders will help you save every moment with you and others.

1. Slow down.

Most of us live our lives like someone who is always driving on the highway. We get to our places quickly, but when we avoid the slow-moving roads of the world, we miss the beauty of the land and the people.

We get so caught up in the rush of life that we lose sight of the things we need to do that we lose sight of the more important things that we often overlook.

When my friend died, realizing that I would never again be visited by his sudden visit made me very sad. I just thought that I would see her the next day, as I had done many times before.

Now I understood how important our times were. I realized that beauty is at every moment of my life - that I don't have to wait for the peak times to feel alive, happy, or loved. I can slow down and enjoy all the blessings of life right now.

2. Learn to talk about death.

Our society does not deal with the reality of death. We live as if we would never die. We are failing to plan and prepare. We set aside important things until it's too late.

Why? It's scary to talk about it, and it's emotionally draining to think about.

I remember being terrified of dying at a young age. I had attended a few funerals, and seeing the corpses was a source of concern to me. Sometimes I still struggle to think and talk about death until it gets closer to home.

The sudden death of my friend reminded me of why it is so important to talk about death with your loved ones. If I die today, will my family be cared for? Will my spouse know my funeral and funeral wishes?

Talking about death allows us to make plans for an inevitable event so that those close to us know what to do when we die. They will experience enough grief, so helping them to feel prepared will reduce their burden.

3. Accept uncertainty.

Like death itself, we are often afraid to accept uncertainty. That is understandable. One of our basic human needs is to feel empowered in our lives. When left unmanaged, they can be left astray and lose the right path.

As a recovering complement, I know of the overreaction when the plans did not go as planned. I was irritated or lost focus. My sense of well-being was often diminished by a slight deviation from my plans.

But I’ve learned over the years that the most amazing thing about uncertainty is how we can be deprived of happiness. If we avoid uncertainty, we are depriving ourselves of all the good that can come from the unexpected.

And while the unexpected is also bound to bring pain, it is from that pain that we gain the wisdom to help us grow emotionally and spiritually.

Although death alone is a certainty, it is not known how and how it happened. As my best friend, I will die - on the day, time and in the wrong way I have chosen.

Accepting this uncertainty eventually sets me free emotionally to live now where I can be even happier and more fulfilled.

How do you accept uncertainty? Start by looking for happiness in the most unexpected places. Look at it when you are scared, angry, depressed, or sad. And remember the times when you were pleasantly surprised. The more you do this, the more you will fear uncertainty because you will know that happiness is always attainable.

4. Live with purpose and meaning.

Why are you doing what you are doing? Is it to please others or because you find meaning in it?

Because we push death to the brink of extinction as a society, we often have no connection with our death. With each passing moment, the closer we get to the day we die. We set aside our dreams and aspirations for an unknown day that may never come.

Bronnie Ware, a paramedic nurse, has recorded high-profile deaths. At the top of the list were the following remorse:

"I wish I had the courage to live a real life for myself, not the life that others expected of me."

The loss of my friend made me wonder: 'Would I be the first to regret it if I died today? Would I have any of the above regrets? Can you?

If you are striving to create meaning in your life, start by thinking about the kind of person you want to be. Finding the meaning has to do with being more than practical. The latter is helpful, but your following, no matter what you do.

5. Give of your love.

During their funerals, we often talk about how much these people have affected us in life. Why can't we tell them while they are still alive?

I often think back to the last day I saw my friend. What would I do or say differently if I knew I would never see her again? Part of me felt unresolved. I wish I had the opportunity to just say a few words of thanks.

When we lose someone, we will have unresolved feelings - unspoken regrets, harsh words that we wish we could get back, or things that we wish we had done to ease their pain.

But do not let that stop you from telling the important people in your life how much you love them. Small acts of kindness and unselfish giving are also important ways to show love.