I'm 26 years old. I'll be 27 in October. I've suffered with depression for most of my teenage years and all the way up to now, I'll have it for the rest of my life. It's not something that can be cured only managed with a daily dose of medication that some days doesn't feel like it works.
Late in the 2010s, mental health has become more and more open to the media; more people were getting help for what they are dealing with. More doctors, support workers, and psychiatrists have more experience with how to deal with the most common mental health issues to date.
Recently I have been dealing with a lot of changes in my life, something that can be difficult for most people, much less a person dealing with mental health issues. However, the emotions I felt during all of these changes were much different from anything I had experienced before. It sent me to the internet, searching for others who had gone through a similar experience. I wondered if something else was wrong with me, or if I had finally snapped. Why? Because I was angry.
Living undiagnosed makes for a difficult childhood. For the first nineteen years of my life I believed the distorted reality I was presented with. In my world I was unloved and life was bleak and hopeless. I never thought I was unhappy, simply because I had never experienced real joy or emotional fulfillment. You can't miss what was never there.
Life can be hard, and it definitely will be. We have these periods, good and then bad—over and over again. It's like a never ending chapter, and just as we think it's over we find out it's not. We are going in circles sometimes, I know how it feels, cuz that's how I feel this very moment. Like in stock, it's like if I've been placed in this box, but it's closed. It feels like there's no way out—like I'm stock.