Addiction - What is Addiction? Part 1

Hear the voice of everyday people - collection of stories and experiences

by Gabriella Kőrösi, PhD, MN, RN

What is addiction? What has been other people's experience? If someone would ask people randomly right now what addiction is what they would say? Beth told me she thinks addiction is when the body needs something, it's the brain signaling that it needs something that the individual cannot live without. Powerful, the brain is telling the person what to do. The individual affected becomes a whole separate person; the brain is in control. It can also be a genetic disease, something that people are were born with. She describes drugs as poison to the body. 

Beth also raised this question during our conversation: "Does someone know that they have a problem if they are addicted to something?" 

She describes her drinking coffee and having chocolate. Is that an addiction? Do people know when they cross the line? I define crossing the line when an individual causes harm to themselves or others.

Having conversation with Sheila who has been working in nutrition. She said addiction is when people have an overwhelming need for something and are willing to do things that are not good for them, and it affects their social life, work life, or health. In any case, it is a negative effect for the individual. Sheila has been dealing with nicotine and sugar addiction in her life. She has now been nicotine free for 20 years, it has taken her many tries throughout the previous 20 years to stop smoking. Her husband is still trying to quit, and he has not been able to do so. Now she even hates the smell. She explained that smoking was extremely difficult to quit, and the motivation for her were her children. I am not here to talk about the professional definitions, anybody can look that up on the internet or in the dictionary. What does addiction mean to the person who is an addict? What does it mean to society? What does it mean to people whose life been touched by addiction or they know somebody who has addiction? It is a way different way to see someone in the street and say oh this is just a drunk; than having a father, mother or sister, brother, friend, grandparents; children suffer from alcoholism or any type of substance or drug addiction. There are of course many substances that are available for abuse today starting with food, cigarettes, vaping, different energy drinks and soda pops, alcohol, drugs including heroin, cocaine, methamphetamine, drugs used in anesthesia and that were banned, drugs that people can buy on the internet with a click of a button and many more coming in all forms types, sizes and shapes.

Edward works in a small rural community. He is passionate about helping others and making his community healthier. Talking to Edward he also mentioned that there are many different addictions, it is a broad topic, it goes beyond alcohol and opioids and some addictions might appear to be positive like running, sex, working, food, coffee, carbs, chocolate. It is a different level and continuum, but these addictions function in a similar fashion in the brain and it is important to have a discussion about it.

Substances can be abused in different ways, can be smoked, inhaled, snorted, injected, taped to the skin like Fentanyl, taken orally, rectally. Probably there are other ways too. Pills including prescribed opiates and benzodiazepines are easy just to pop in (as I have heard many times) or crush up and hard to keep count how many someone had taken when they are suffering from the disease of addiction. A pill might feel like all the pain in the world will go away. Then addiction kicks in and people just want one more and one more and one more. This is even harder when the medication is prescribed and the person thinks it is OK just to take one more, soon it will be more than just one extra pill. It will become two, three than even more, then prescriptions start to run out. Then what will happen, the doctor might or might not prescribe more so what the person will do when they are in pain and in distress and believe that need their medicine? They will do whatever means necessary to numb their pain. They will ask friends, buy off the streets. I was told by many people, the pills become too expensive and heroin or other substances are cheaper and the cycle begins. If this is all someone knows to numb the pain so of course the brain would say just take one more the pain will be better. They think that they will be happier. They will fall asleep, and do not feel what is going on in their life. Pain of living, any kind and anxiety, previous trauma, difficulty fitting in, mental health problems, stress can feel real. People who are trapped might not know that they are in a terrible cycle? Do they realize what is going on with them even if others tell them? Maybe they will, or maybe they will not, it is not easy to admit even if something is wrong. It is much easier to turn away and say: I am just fine. I just need my medicine to feel better. It is the person's truth even if others think they could deal with their pain in another way it is not their truth. It is very easy to say well why don't they do this or that.

Every day we can see the young and the old throwing their lives away deep into addiction. The shadows on the street that people do not want to see. They are there even if people pretend not to look. They are lost. All we can hope for that is we can touch their hearts and minds in some way that will give a drop of knowledge, hope for a future for them. Why should someone care? Should we just walk away? Should we show mercy? Can we just keep ignoring what is going on in our society? Can we ignore the pain? People sinking into the mud of addiction. What would they need to get out?

Mary is a passionate provider. She described her older brother to me as someone who has tried every drug there is to try. She was not sure if she would call him someone who is dealing with addiction. Mary also talked about a position where she provided direct service to people who dealt with addictions related to drugs and alcohol. Her clients were using substances to try to survive harsh living conditions. Something that had happened to them, living in a car, living with an abusive partner, or family member. Using substances become a tool to help them cope and mask the pain they endure. After a while this tool created more suffering and by then it is very hard to let go of the tool, the addictive behavior. People wanted to stop but were also scared of what they have to face once they stop. What is their trauma that they have to face on the other side? Many people Mary worked with were kind of stuck, so if somebody who is been drinking now let's say about 45 years old living in his car and tries to stop, have nobody to help or support, they are scared, what will happen when they stop. Their life will not just miraculously turn around. Mary felt many people felt pointless to stop they felt no hope for a normal life like having a job, having a house, it was out of their reach; so, then what is the point. People going through something like this feel absolutely alone and hopeless. They are already in pain, either before the addiction or now because of things they had done since they started using substances. Lack of hope.

Mary also tells me that she feels like addiction is a tool that people might start to use. Nobody thinks that they might start to use a tool then not be able to put it down. A tool to soothe the nervous system that has been hurt. Her analogy very interesting and thought provoking. People use this tool to try to navigate a difficult world when they have no access to other tools or skills. Lack of family support, lack of social support can create this when people are just trying to figure out how to be in this world. In the beginning Mary explained drugs and alcohol do make people feel more social, more confident, then addiction happens through the neuro-biological process. Then the process is being reinforced. Our brain is very complex as there are certain chemicals that play a role called dopamine, serotonin, natural opiates; these chemicals influence addiction, makes the choice to stop very difficult. Mary feels that people are being kept in a loop that different systems put around them.

Addiction hurts a lot of people. I met a lot of people whose life was touched by the darkness of addiction. Even if they don't have someone in their family or friends, they hear about it, see it on the streets, and sooner or later they will know someone who went through addiction or currently dealing with it. There are many wonderful people out there who had been dealing with addiction or in the road to recovery. Addiction is a horrible disease affecting millions and billions of people around our globe. Addiction is everywhere. Our society is set up in a way that people in all of the classes are affected; even middle class and higher who have food on the table can become anxious and depressed over things; life is too much to handle for them at the specific time, or they just want to have fun. Prescription drugs don't help either. Many people become addicted after acute or chronic illness. It can be anyone at any time. People see medications around them for example in the advertisements, movies, shows, the neighbor's house. Some people want bigger and better even if they do not need bigger and better. There have been research studies that concluded more money and more things will not make people to be a happier person. Lack of community and support, seeking acceptance creates a major missing component in people's lives creating the anxiety and depression that moves them toward substance abuse. Many times, addiction can also be coupled with mental health problems where people self-medicate because they cannot get mental health care, or the side effects of the medications are intolerable to them. It does not help when the doctors start to prescribe benzodiazepines for anxious patients in the long term. Addiction touches many lives and as many of my patients told me opiates are making them feel good. Everyone wants to feel good. There is no harm in the beginning. Many people just feel good, still have jobs, have their family, house it is all good. But then of course those things will be lost if addiction continues. It is a lifelong journey, many had been down that road it is hard to come back, hard to resist and it is an everyday struggle.

Sheila describes addiction as an illness. Seeking happiness and acceptance and the fear of not being accepted by others creates a loop in many people's lives. Imagine it like a missing link that people will try to fill with whatever they can to feel better. It might not start that way in the beginning, but then pills and drinks will get out of control in time. Many people recognize that they do not want to take the pills, drugs or alcohol anymore, but also do not know how to stop. The brain is very powerful, once it knows what makes it feel good, it wants and wants more even if it causes distraction for the individual. No matter the cost. Craves and wants more and more frequently. Different social classes have anxiety and acceptance issues about different things, but anyone can end up with addiction. What could help? Every person is different and what motivates them could be different too. Additionally, social support to decrease social anxiety can be helpful; working on creating supportive communities, prevention, coping skills from a very early age. Environments where social connections are without substances at all levels of the social spectrum; and decrease the self-thought negative feelings could help decrease anxiety and fear in people thus decreasing the chance for addiction.

There are many questions relating addiction. Everybody's truth can be different. People might agree or disagree and that is fine. Why is addiction important? Why should we care? Why do people do what they do? Why do people who use substances hurt people? They are just homeless bums, aren't they? I heard this and similar comments so many times. Why don't people who deal with addiction appreciate life? How can they just throw away everything? Why do they hurt the people who love them? They don't want help; they just want to have fun. They go out and use the drugs don't care about anybody and anything. Are addicts as happy and careless people? Are drugs worth throwing their life away? Do they want to die? Why don't they know any better? Are people who use drugs, or any substances any happier? Not what I have seen, not what I have heard. People dealing with addiction have moments of happiness the same way we all have moments of happiness. All of us want to be happy. Being someone who is using substances is not fun at all. People can only think this is fun if they are a crazy careless human being who have no idea what they are talking about. Some people are and blinded by their own misperceptions and stupid interpretations of what addiction is. I have watched hundreds to thousands of people in the streets and patients in the hospital, in treatment, in clinics, in the community who struggle with addiction. Can people really think they can step into their shoes and know what is going on in their head? All of us are different. Can someone really know the entire trauma a person suffered? It is a true catastrophe; when someone's mind is being taken over by a substance so that they don't have a free will of self anymore. Imagine: Having a fight continuously between conscious life and unconsciousness. A struggle between the one place that should fight for someone; their brain turning against them and telling them that all they need is some more drugs to feel better. Sounds like so much fun and happiness. Addiction is a constant fight to survive and say no or yes for every day, from hour to hour, minute by minute for the rest of someone's life. 

Only the person affected by addiction really knows their own horror and what they are going through in their disease process. 

Why would anyone really want to be an addict? It is not a choice, it happens, then people get stuck in a terrible cycle and cannot get out. Does anyone wake up in the morning and say OK I want to be an addict now. This is my life goal. Does a child who had an addicted mother, father, aunt or a friend who started them on drugs or alcohol from conception in the womb or at age 5, 8 or 10 or 13 really have any choice? Yet, people judge, when they have no idea. How can someone look at a child who now become an adult suffering in the terrible cycle and tell them "well they are just an addict, they don't care; they are nothing"? How would they know any other life? If this has been their life since they can remember? Anybody who have not touched by addiction is privileged. People have no idea how lucky they are if they don't have any addiction problems. The people who are struggling with this disease are sick and need our help every day every hour every minute or they can and will die without support, love and caring. Many people have no choice and struggle every day, and many have no one to love of care for them. It is easy to move away and think this is someone else's problem. We live in this society together; addiction is everyone's problem. Please be kind. Think about the story behind the person. Help. Should anybody die just because they are trapped in a terrible disease? Is that justified? Is that fair? People could say: Why should we care? Society should care. Governments should care. Friends and family should care. The world should care. What can we do to stop this cycle?

Talking to Mary she described to me that while most of her family had dealt with addictions from drugs to alcohol and she grew up in it and even tried some things, she never got caught up in the drugs. She just felt it was a waste of her time. Makes me wonder why some people are more susceptible to addiction then others. I was never drawn into drinking or trying anything that might alter my perception, the thought that I don't act like myself is scary to me. I have seen many people caught up in addiction, and they had no idea what they were talking about the previous day when they were under the influence of substances of drugs or alcohol.

Edward was telling me that he is lucky in a way that there is no addiction in his immediate family or friends, some of his distant family he knows have had a problem with alcohol but does not know intimate details about the issue. He hears a lot about addiction at work but does not directly work with addiction. He hears a lot about the opioid crisis, that is a public health issue and needs to be addressed. Edward defines addiction when the physical body takes over the mental body overpowers it to become satisfied with whatever chemical it happens to be. There is very little control after that because it is more of the bodily or physical response then emotional or mental control. Had a discussion about this with Edward, he is thinking about the brain that is cognitive and logical. The brain that is usually in control, but not this time. Not during addiction. The brain gets hijacked when using drugs. Edward feels that some people have greater propensity to addiction then others, we also had a discussion about who is responsible to support the individual once the addiction took over. If the brain is hijacked, then is it really the individual's responsibility to try to get help? Would they even be able too?

Our Society: Addiction and More Uncovered. Hear the voices of everyday people - collection of stories and experiences.

Dancing Elephants Press. All rights reserved.

Copyright @ 2020. 1st addition on Amazon KDP.

2nd addition Jan 2021 Barnes & Noble

This book is dedicated to the memory of

Bagóczky József my uncle who died at age 19 - alcohol-related car accident

and to everyone else who has been hurt or lost related to addiction

Many people had been supportive and inspiring to me so I could create this book. Both of my wonderful children told me, just write that book, mom. My mom. I could have not done this without all the stories provided and the encouragement love and caring from my family and friends, nurses, doctors, counselors, teachers, professors, friends who are dealing with addiction and staying sober; and children, wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers of people who are dealing with addiction currently. Thank you for speaking up, sharing your stories and life experiences. Thank you for all the people who read this book while in progress to provide feedback, ideas, and encouragement for me to continue writing. I would like to say special thanks to my friends and family for believing me and encouraging me to go on.

If you like my writing you can buy me coffee https://www.buymeacoffee.com/GabriellaKorosi