Addiction- What is Addiction?

Addiction can strike in many different ways, losing finances can be one consequence. Dr. Tedd Levin who has been a physician in family medicine was telling me a story about 2 people who spent $ 50,000 a year to support their cocaine addiction, and lost everything they had, including their home. He also describes a lot of overlap between mental illness and addiction. He had a lot of experience working with youth. Working as a center physician for Job Corps youth for 17 years he has seen lots of young people between 16–25 years old who have been in multiple rehabs for treatment of addiction, and multiple psychiatric hospitalizations. He describes that it is difficult to figure out if it is a drug induced psychosis or a primary mental illness that the patient is going through such as schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. Dr. Tedd Levin feels that all type of addictions are very tough to treat. We had a conversation about smoking and how smoking has been declining, but now a new thing coming up like vaping. There is always something new comes up. We discussed obesity and the consequences related to obesity. Addictions are tough no matter what the choice is alcohol, drugs, smoking or food.

Detachment. This is what Angel told me during our conversation. Addiction caused detachment in her family from both of her brothers. Even though now they are doing better the relationship was estranged because of addiction. The hardest part she said was watching her parents going through self-questioning what went wrong. They raised 4 children all the same way, two got touched by addiction the other two did not. She describes a nephew who is in prison right now for armed robbery because of a drug deal. He is 23 years old. Angel feels that she as many others feel that jail in not necessarily a bad thing because at least their loved ones are safe and not using. During our conversation I asked Angel what she thinks addiction is. She laughed. Not sure why but we both busted out laughing. Maybe because our conversation has been hard, and we just needed a laugh so we can go on. She said that this is so hard. It is so complex. She describes herself as a person who believes in moderation. She believes in a Bell-curve from biology, to be in the middle. She would enjoy a piece of cake but would not eat the whole thing. Addiction she notes slips into the extreme to either end either completely denying something or overindulging to cover something else up. Addiction is when alcohol, drugs, games, social media, eating, whatever it is, when that becomes the center point of someone's life and their decisions are made based on those things; that she felt is the moment when people get into those extremes. Angel described that when anything becomes the focal point of someone's life it becomes unhealthy even if it is their job. I asked Paige what addiction means for her. She said she thinks it is something someone cannot live without.

Jason works at a police department. He had a lot of experience in his personal and professional life when it comes to addiction. He talked about his mom using alcohol and prescription drugs when he was growing up. He describes addiction as something that had killed his mother from inside out. He remembers her as a wonderful mother. It was difficult for the family, they worried about her. She had suicidal tendencies and Jason taking turns with his 4 other siblings took care of her. Jason thinks that seeing his mother dealing with addiction is what made him become a police officer. He feels that because of his personal experience he can understand and comprehend what the people with addiction and their families are going through. His mom passed away 15 years ago while in treatment due to a heart attack. She was 63 years old. Jason describes addiction as a sickness that can affect anybody. It can control someone's life and take over how they act. Including anger, stealing, lying that comes with feeding the habit of addiction. Jason recalls going to the doctor appointment with his mother and she would ask for more pain medication when she did not really need it. Kayla describes addiction as a lack of having something. Unhealthy series of behaviors. Getting to a certain point where someone is going to an extreme to find a certain feeling, mentality of physical state. Willing to do anything to get there.

Addiction can be different for everyone. Rory who is currently works as a counselor and has his own practice went through different types of addictions himself. He describes it as being a person who was addicted to things on and off would use something, then become sober then use something else. He mostly used stimulants; he describes stimulants as something that was always very appealing to him. He had three DUI (Driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol) as a consequence of using. Although he had friends that AA worked well for, he did not believe God and a higher power and rejected the idea of going to AA meetings. Rory defines addiction as a surrender of control. Something that is foundational caused by trauma. He tells me a story about this. He was sexually molested when he was 8 years old by a 13-year-old boy. He did not understand at that time what was going on, neither did he feel ashamed. It was years later he understood how that was not appropriate. He was more afraid of what his mother would think that he is trying to fool around with an older boy. He still remembers his name. He wonders what his story was. He did not really understand what was going on and he was disappointed that this boy did not want to be his friend anymore after that incident. Rory also describes another story when he was 6 years old and his uncle came to live with them. His uncle was promoting sexual behavior among the neighborhood boys at a local fort. His uncle got into trouble for this before that is why he had to move away from his grandmother's house. Rory was exposed to a lot of sexual behaviors from a very early age. He describes that this exposure and amphetamines felt good. Felt better than the shame he felt growing up in a fundamentalist tradition as he describes that told him he will go to hell. He felt there was no hope. He felt that there was no hope since he was 8 years old. Then he said why not party if there is no hope anyway. Loss of control.

Tracy describes addiction as when something else takes over. It takes over the mind, and the body. An addict can't stop, no matter what. Can't go anywhere else. People can be addicted to a lot of different things. She feels like we all probably have some kind of addiction. She describes her teens as playing video games, or with cell phones. Addiction just takes over; it changes who the person is. It takes people down on a negative path. Diana describes addiction as the inability to accept and act on life in a good and productive way, so people find another way to get through the day or a week and they turn to what seems the easiest. Then they are hooked, and it turns out not to be the easiest. Just trying to deal with daily lives does not work. Then people try to find something that they think will help them. No matter what others say that this isn't good, they will not listen and just follow what they know to feel good. She feels that the tendency it is in families. She worries about her grand kids because of this, hoping they don't fall into any addictive behaviors in the future. Chloe describes addiction as a compulsive need to do something over and over again. No strength to stop even if willingness is there. Michelle tells me that in addiction the body's needs for the chemical that is now being created. (by using whatever the person is using at the time) A force that is created that impacts what people do and the decisions they make. Addiction takes over that people don't have control over their life anymore.

Our Society: Addiction and More Uncovered. Hear the voices of everyday people - collection of stories and experiences.

Dancing Elephants Press. All rights reserved.

Copyright @ 2020. 1st addition on Amazon KDP.

2nd addition Jan 2021 Barnes & Noble

This book is dedicated to the memory of

Bagóczky József my uncle who died at age 19 - alcohol-related car accident

and to everyone else who has been hurt or lost related to addiction

Many people had been supportive and inspiring to me so I could create this book. Both of my wonderful children told me, just write that book, mom. My mom. I could have not done this without all the stories provided and the encouragement love and caring from my family and friends, nurses, doctors, counselors, teachers, professors, friends who are dealing with addiction and staying sober; and children, wives, husbands, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers of people who are dealing with addiction currently. Thank you for speaking up, sharing your stories and life experiences. Thank you for all the people who read this book while in progress to provide feedback, ideas, and encouragement for me to continue writing. I would like to say special thanks to my friends and family for believing me and encouraging me to go on.