Working Title: Fear

Why does being human hurt? Why is existing exhausting?

I've never felt like this before. I've never felt like nothing before.

My thoughts won't let go. They envelope me. Envelope me. I want to carve them out with a scalpel. Claustrophobia for the walls that shielded me now trap the enemy. My enemy. I cannot focus on a single thought for it will tear me to pieces. I have to sit and watch them storm around with my head in my hands. I want it to go away. Go away. Make them go away. Please. I don’t want to think anymore. Stop. Stop. Stop-

-Walking in my catacombs, overwhelmed by the pain, the hurt, the betrayal, the jealousy, the regret, the self-pity, the self-hatred, the kind words that twisted the knife. How could they be so sweet but still not give a shit. Autophobia and my heart sinks. I am reaching out my hand. Can't you see it?

Am I even here? I see my breath, but I don’t feel my heartbeat anymore.

My house collapsed again. Not the one I sleep in but the one I dream in. It hasn’t happened in a while. I was always able to rebuild it, but this time, somethings changed, the bricks crumble in my hands, the windows break. I need to board them up with planks and plastic sheets. Kakorrhaphiophobia as the leg of a stool shatters and I need to use books to support it. But the books are old, the plastic is torn, and the wood has mold. The tape won't stick, the glue dries too quick, my tools are dull, and-

-I don’t think the medication is working. Maybe I need a higher dosage, but I'm terrified of the tiny wording on the side. Thanatophobia but the depth is guiding. Enchanting, its darker yet darker. Don’t let go of the rope. The thread is thinning. Its only time before it-

OH, WILL YOU SHUT UP

And then it whispers

and snaps.