WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU GET

She has grown to allow herself to believe that with me she is delusional

That everything that she has learned of me is something that's just for show...I am simply not the truth.

My physical and my mental are things that I use as stepping stones she says

But if she only knew how fast I would trade them both in just to get ahead...

You see with me, what you see is what you get...to a certain extent

True enough I have eyes that speak a language all their own...

True enough I can refrain from a single touch and make your body moan....

True enough the way of my words dance to a rhythm of their own kind,,,,

True enough I have been known to touch many souls and even many more minds....

Always excepted and my being is usually embraced....

Those who speak such hateful words of me, usually want to take my place

So what is YOUR agenda? Have I become your discrace?

So to hear them from you it really makes my thoughts STOP

First time I heard you say that no one really knows me...you should've seen my mought DROP

True enough no one on this earth knows me as you do...

But then again none of them have managed to put me thru the things that you do

My relationship with others is no where near what I had with you..

The connection between lovers and friends is something I can't compare so how could YOU?

For you to let those words roll so easily off your tongue as if I put on a fascade to be whatever to you

I've never changed for NO ONE..that's one thing that I'll never do

For you to question the woman that I am, and make me wonder where it all came from

To have you making me feeling like I was on top of the world to making me feel less then one

To persist to go from one extreme to another with me on a daily basis...

And you have the nerve to accuse me of having so many faces....

Take my looks for granted? Hell, you truly have no idea of whats its like to be me...

Just try to be Shawna...try to be myself...try to be Free....

Imagine having all of the best qualities and feeling so empty inside

Imagine looking for something that doesn't exist and the feeling of dying each night

Imagine knowing that you are the best woman that you can be

Imagine hearing the person that you love telling you that what you are just simply isn't mean to be

I can only be one thing, I can only be what I have come to be

Hence I am a gift from God and then came the name of "Free"..

Yes ladies and gentlemen...that would be me

So here and now I intoduce to you what everyone seems to overlook

My life has been hell, it no where near a fairytale book

I've lived a life of continuous closed doors and broken promises

Untrue loves and empty hearted kisses

Battered on the inside and bruised deeply within

Chasing down my worries with my daily dose of Gin

Not making excuses or blaming anyone for my pains

But I am living proof that with the storm there always comes the rain

Being beautiful comes with a price....looking like this has never been nice...

Constantly labeled to have no brains.....they take you thru training and take you thru it again

Always underestimated and forever overlooked....

Youd never guess how many times someone looked at me and told me that I didn't have what it took

I've been the best worker at many of my jobs

I've worked my ass of harder then some niggas, those over rated slobs

Sweating and bruising myself over and over again

But I refuse to let myself down, I refuse to let them win

Never fails to be the object of many peoples attention..

I wouldnt mind being able to walk thru the streets with the feeling that I'm just blending in.

Why do you come down so hard on me? Is being beautiful such a sin?

Thought I was all the things you needed wrapped into one..

Only to find out that all of my flaws were your primary focus....seems the devil has won.

My first reaction is to convince you that I am who you knew me to be then and now and forever will be

But to be honest I shouldn't have to prove myself to someone who claims to love me.

You find it so hard to truly accept the person that I am

But baby it's me, only me....so I need you to act like you give a damn

Would it be easier for you to love me if I was a self centered bitch?

If I fucked with females who only had money with intentions of making me rich?

If I lived a life of what YOU wanted me to be,

Molding myself into something else other then the individual they call "Free"?

What you see is what you get....that's all I want you to know

In this short amount of time you have broken me down, at the same time helped me to grow

Constantly making excuses as to why you can't do this and why youre not ready for us

I often think that youre trying to convince yourself to unlove me, forcing yourself to believe that it was just lust

For you thats a must...

I can't change how you view me, nor will I try...

Look into my eyes because here the truth does lie...

It hurts to know that you think that I'm so made up and put together

As if someone like me happens over night and changes like the weather

Shit whatever...my skins like leather

People ty to get under my skin and brake my soul

The things I've over come none of you truly know

What you see is what you get and I simply won't change

Period.

Point blank.

NOW...you can turn the page.