What Have You Done For Me?

Dear somebody that I used to know,

Fifteen years have passed us by,

And I wonder, what have you done for me to fly?

Our friendship has expired, and so have the ties,

So much time has gone, so much life has passed by.

How's Billy, or is it John, Mohammed, or Lee?

I can't keep track, it's all a mystery to me,

And Fiancé A, B, or C, is it on or is it off?

Honestly, it's hard to tell, it's all so tough.

If you're so happy, why art thou so snappy?

"You shouldn't have done that!" you declare, oh so sappy,

Honestly, no one cares if I hugged another girl's man,

In a German lake, it's not part of some grand plan.

You rode my ex-boyfriend's snake in a park,

My poor friend will never see slugs and snails the same way, it's stark,

Every baby you've had, you've given away,

All swapped for your soul, it's outrageous, I must say.

You're a drama llama who can't be tamed,

You don't like your karma, that's too bad, it can't be framed,

You'll be back on Facebook before you can say EastEnders,

But we're not twins, and my songs are not your songs to render.

All these years of crawling, stalking, bitching, and backstabbing,

You always want what I have, cause you want the clams filled, it's grabbing,

No coffee or tea can save us now, it's time to part,

So leave my friends alone, keep your hands off my bed and my man's heart.

We're muting your drug-infused critique,

It's time to move on, it's time to seek,

A life of your own, away from mine,

Goodbye, somebody that I used to know, it's time to decline.

Sincerely,

Someone who's moving on.