What Did I Do To Make You Angry?
Lingering Questions From A Survivor Of Abuse.
Was it that I was never kind?
Was it that I spoke my mind?
Everybody thinks differently, you know,
but did I truly deserve to be abused and hit?
Was it really because I never did anything?
Was I too lazy?
Was I crazy? Or were you guilt-tripping to keep me silent?
Did I do something to warrant those bruises that make
my body feel and look ugly?
Why was I never perfect enough for you?
Well, excuse me for speaking, nobody is perfect;
Not even you.
Maybe you were abused yourself,
Maybe you were unwell,
Maybe you were drowning in the anger from your past,
No matter what;
I won't make up excuses for the way you took
my self-esteem,
Or my confidence.
There is no excuse for treating another human being
so poorly,
Leaving a man or a woman feeling that they are so worthless,
they no longer want to live;
That is how you left me feeling
One question remains,
What did I do to make you angry?
Maybe I'll never get the answers I deserve,
You'll continue to blame me;
Though I ask that question every day,
I will not retreat into that fragile shell that you cracked
with your fist and mental put-downs;
I will stand proud and tall in this new life I have created,
A new life which I deserve, one where happiness and contentment
prevail over your abuse.
You may never answer my question,
because you live with blaming me,
You are too proud to admit that your behaviour
was wrong;
I won't let that lingering question
in my mind make me feel bad again,
It is what it is,
Just a question;
A ghost from the past,
Unwelcome in my happy, free future;
A future I gladly created without you.
About the Creator
Carol Townend
Fiction, Horror, Sex, Love, Mental Health, Children's fiction and more. You'll find many stories in my profile. I don't believe in sticking with one Niche! I write, but I also read a lot too.
Comments (1)
The questions of why always haunt us, but your ending shows us the way! Nicely done.