"Unbreathing" Open Wound

Openness is usually interpreted as vulnerability

and vulnerability is the last thing anyone wants to feel when healing

So we close ourselves off

Like a bloomed flower closing up at night

We’re tortoises retreating into our shells

our “safe space” so to speak

We’re hermit crabs during moulting season

We’re unbreathing open wounds covered in gauze for extended periods of time

a breeding ground for bacteria

with no room for fresh air

Trauma and pain solidifies into concrete bricks

year after year

brick layers come after brick layers

forming a wall not intentionally built

And like the Berlin Wall

will require a community to make it fall

We know the wall is there

we want it to stay erected

That’s because we have decided that our hearts are now cold

and we need something to keep them warm

so we keep this security blanket

We think that having a heart of stone equates to strength

but if even a diamond can be shattered

are stone hearts really that strong

Why is rigidness considered stronger than malleability

Why must we change our hearts

the very essence of our being

in the name of survival

We truly undervalue our hearts

seeing them as precious inanimate objects

when they’re actually living things

and we all know that a life is more valuable than any material object

If the Koh-I-Noor is considered priceless then life is of inestimable value

And like the Koh-I-Noor our hearts are enclosed and red taped

we foolishly believe it’s for safety and protection

but enclosing a living thing is putting it in a cage

Nothing can come in and it cannot come out

Why cage an animal when you can let it roam free

and if the wild isn’t safe enough

put it in a sanctuary

Let it recover and gain enough strength to return to the wild

when it is ready to

We treat our hearts like hardened criminals

so we sentence them to prison

and only set them free after they have served their time

That is not healing

that is punishment

When did loving unabashedly become a crime

Our hearts deserve a true safe space

a sanctuary to heal and still be open to exploration

A place to be vulnerable within our own limits

to unabashedly love and allow ourselves to be loved

Why have love come to you during visitation hours

when you could experience and see it always

because as much as love can destroy

it can create and repair just as easily

I wasted months contemplating

but tonight is the night

for the jailbreak of a lifetime

She'll be free to explore and experience all the love this world has to offer

all the love I have locked her away from

SO GO HEART

BE FREE

AND ACCEPT ALL THE LOVE