Tortured Soul, Awakened Heart

Table of Contents

1. Awakened Desire

2. Soul Crush

3. Alone

4. Emotional Suicide

5. Lost

6. Fading

7. Love and Unloved

8. Sea of despair and desperation

9. Alive

10. Goodbye to Love

11. Heaven and Hell

12. The end of innocence

13. Shining light burning bright

14. The Rage

15. The End

16. Lust

17. The Blessed and The Lost

18. Never Again

19. A Tale of Love and A twist of Hate

20. Angels Around Us Everyday

21. Inner Demons Running Wild

22. Another Day

23. Two Hearts Beating As One

24. The hell within

25.Torment

26.In the still of the night

27.Living in a cold cruel world

28.Monster inside

29. Stranded

30. Every Touch

31. Desire

32. Lost in sorrow

33. Loved Again

34. Missing You

35. When strength isn't enough

36.Sinners Touch

1. Awakened Desire

Sinfully with wanton abandon he kisses her flesh tracing each curve

tasting and teasing caressing the softness reading her like a book eager to learn

Slowly inhaling her scent listening with intent to her moans and whispered surrender

Giving in to every waking desire burning higher and higher

Shaking with bliss and tangled in the web of passion and awakened desire

They come as one holding on with all they have inside them not wanting it to end

Never wanting it to stop , just wanting it to build even higher until the throes of desire does bend

Sleeping exhausted in each others embrace

Reliving in their dreams the sweet caress of each other's touch

Cherishing each other's love and the hot sweetness of their taste.

2. Soul Crush

Darkness surrounding her crushing her soul

Taking over her mind her body no longer in control

Screaming and crying tearing at her flesh crimson red droplets flowing

Her inner demons growing.

The past she left continues to haunt and torment every waking moment holding on

Never letting go always ever so strong.

Laying on the floor the cold winter breeze seeping through the cracked window

Chilling her tired blood stained aching bones

Her cries unheard for she is always alone

Living a life of hell no love to call her own.

Forever in torment her soul is crushed her spirit is weak

She has cried so much she cannot speak

She trembles with fear she shudders at what could have been

If only she had stayed and took the abuse all in

But she couldn't she fought for her right to live life

Now once again faced with that choice again she must win

She must fight she must grow she must get back up on her own

Hard as it may be she must fight for her soul to be free.

3. Alone

The world around him has disappeared into the unknown

So now he walks the earth humbled and forever alone

Unrepented and tortured from the hell he has seen

His soul burning for eternity.

His dreams escapes him his nightmares reign

Driving him to the brink of going insane.

Alone in a world that is nothing more than rubble and fire

Flames touching his skin ever so higher

Never would he have thought that the hell he was taught about was true

Until one day he awakened to the ruins around him the skies no longer blue.

Nobody to reach for as they have all been taken home to the great beyond

Too late for redemption from all he has done wrong.

Wandering around in an abyss of despair destruction and depravity he seeks shelter

Only to find all has been burned to the ground there is no happy ever after.

Alone for eternity in hell he cannot escape

Forever to wander the fires that burn around him

Alone is his fate.

4. Emotional Suicide

Inside dying no will to go on strength gone like a gentle breeze

Emotional suicide deep within the heart tearing the mind apart with ease

Soul screaming and writhing in torment and pain

Nightmares that plague the mind overcoming it with shame

Never knowing what is real

Never knowing how to feel

Just wandering through life with no place to go

No love to keep the soul warm no place to call home

Emotionally drained physically pained

Everything in life lost no more to be gained

Emotional suicide slowly killing the inner self

Gnashing and gnawing creating and overwhelming hell

Where is the love that once held the body together so strong

Where is the right that has no turned to wrong.

It is gone.

5. Lost

Lost so lost in a world of destruction and hell

Fire and brimstone upon the earth unbound

Engulfing the once thriving shell.

Death and sadness fill the void that once was beautiful and splendor

Green grass now dead and brown the once living has bowed down and surrendered

Surrendered to the fate of unrepentance and shame

Living in empty shells that once were full of life and sane

Now they are just drones in hell's devilish game.

Lost forever reaping what they sow the souls of the lost are now owned

Owned and bound by chains of fire whips of thorns stinging the flesh

Skin ripping and tearing at each lash makes against the old and the fresh

Souls lost forever in a world they cannot escape

For they are now owned a heavy price they have paid.

In the distance a scream shatters the earth breaking the barrier of sound

Screeching in torment writhing in pain forever hellbound

Lost and there is no way back no place to hide

Lost forever in hell their time they must bide.

6. Fading

She lives in seclusion away from the civilized world

A hopeless recluse a empty shell of a girl

Fading amongst the people that surround her

Inside she fights and she yearns.

Hoping for brighter days she bides her time

Repairing and managing the insanity that is her mind

Staying to herself never getting to close

For love is a game , easy come easy go

Her heart healing from pain her esteem rebuilding from shame

The fire that is inside her grows fierce higher and higher the flames

Yet she still fades into the background of a once brighter life

Shadowed by the past that she fought hard to leave behind

Fading fast amongst them all

Fading fast she stumbles and she falls

Fading.

7. Love and Unloved

Feelings split , heart torn apart

Where does hate end and where does love start

There are the ones who feel love and those who don't

Some who give warmth and some who won't

All too often people live their lives in confusion never knowing where to go

Never learning to embrace love or even allowing it to freely flow

Unloved are some who feel alone living a life of desolation

Living a life all on their own.

Never feeling the love and warmth of an embrace

Or experiencing the soft caresses and kisses upon their face

Struggling through life tormented by the memory of yesterday

Tortured inside by nightmares that will never fade

Burning inside of hot raging hatreds fire

The flames of disdain growing ever so higher

Until the end when the hate begins to die

The flames will continue to burn and ignite

Shining its light of self destruction and loath against the pain

Blocking out the memories that forever haunt and caresses the recesses of her brain

She looks at all those around her with a quiet reserve

Waiting and biding her time for when it is her turn

Her turn to love and feel love in return

The caress of a warm touch against her skin

The rage of desires and its burn.

8. Sea of despair and Desperation

WInd blowing strong and fierce

Skies above are grey

Walks a man that carries many scars

And inside he hides his fears.

Long ago he lost himself , lost a great part of who he was

The love of his life had passed away in his arms

Forever creating a great hole in his now broken heart.

So now he lives in a sea of despair and desperation trying to seek some peace

In search of finding love again and trying to make the pain forever cease

He walks along all day and night looking for true love

But the one true love that he had is now in the great big blue

Biding his time he walks alone going to and from

Never finding that true love

He walks in a sea of despair and desperation.

9. Alive

The wind crying loudly against night skies

Rain falling hard against the ground making the darkness come alive

Cold bitterness amongst the crowd touching each and everyone

Holding and grasping at the inner souls reaching to tear the alive apart

Shaking the core of humanity making the blood flow hot and hard

Wearily in the distance a young child cries

Struggling in the midst of darkness looking to stay alive

Searching for love and comfort of a mother long gone

A father who has never been known

Struggling and fighting and wandering the streets

Growing tougher and stronger trying to stay the course he keeps

In the far end of the corners of the long distance of earth

Lies a woman battered and beat bloody bruised and hurt

Crying helplessly in pain feeling alone in her shame

So many hurt in this world we live in

Evil abound sin after sin

Fire and wars hunger and homeless struggling to survive

Doing anything and everything they can just to stay alive

Some will win some will lose

Some will ease the pain with drugs and booze

Some will give up the fight and give up and die

Taking their chances with suicide

But what we all need as people is to not give up

To keep ourselves alive strong and filled with love

Even if we walk alone with nobody to care or call our own

We as a whole must learn to accept life and live it fully

If we are to stay alive we must give it all we got let our light shine on

Despite the pain and misery that surrounds us we must stay strong.

10. Goodbye To Love

Goodbye to love unrequited and restrained

Tortured soul free from the cold steel chains

Never to be tormented again by shame

Free to love without the mind and heart games

Goodbye to love that had hurt so much

That burned and seared through the body with every touch

Goodbye to the torment of abusive words and thoughts

No more will self hatred be taught.

Goodbye to love that is no longer true

That shames and harms leaving the mind and heart blue

No more touching bruises or covering up the trails of abuse

No more crying alone in a shallow cold corner waiting to be used

Goodbye to the falsehood of what love was inflicted to be

It is now time to escape from this hell this cruel hard reality

Fleeing into the night with just a hope and a prayer

Running far away from the hurt from the hated love slayer

Freedom it is a bittersweet feeling in the purest of forms

Nevertheless it is a feeling worth having a feeling worth fighting for

Goodbye to love for now until the day we meet again

May the next time i fall in love may it be without pain.

11. Heaven and Hell

Heaven and hell two contrasts of different worlds

One full of wonder and love joy and peace

The other full of hate and fire pain that will never cease

Gnashing of teeth tearing the flesh burning the soul

While in heaven there is sweet sounds of music

The love is under no control.

Heaven and hell are also here upon the earth

Through wars and famine and fires and murder

Rape and ill gotten gains

Babies taken away in silence never experiencing birth.

The contrast of the two that takes hold of our lives

Can be summed up as choices good or bad

Will it consume our soul to no end eating away our insides

Or be the best in life we as a whole will ever have

Sometimes heaven and hell is just a forethought as not many people believe they are real

The concept goes against every probable theory not many know how to feel

What is real and what is fake? People always ask

If heaven is real and God is as well does he allow all that's bad

You see the concept to many are that if you cannot feel it taste it or see it then it must not be a fact

But the truth of the matter is that if it is not then it is to be believed that faith is just a word an untruth some even say it's bad

Heaven and hell two worlds in the universe that play out in our everyday lives whether people believe or not

As for me I will say this the two is all i got.

12. The End Of Innocence

Crystal visions running through her head

As she lays awake thinking of all the things left unsaid

Dreaming of the day she can break the chains

From the nightmares that plague her and bring her pain

Long ago she loved and trusted a man

Who was kind and funny who had a plan

Then in a twist it all came crashing down

When he beat and punished her throwing her to the ground

Blood dripping from her pale flesh crimson droplets hitting the floor

As his rage fuels fierce and uncontrollable pushing her head through a door

Never hearing her cries as she is writhing in pain

Only laughing and taking delight in her torture and shame

The alcohol filled air assaults her every sense in her body making her ill

Laying in wait for the last punch and kick that will kill

Praying for all the hurt to just go away

To be free again from this misery and wrath of his misplaced hate

Until the day she finds the courage to make her way to escape

She bides her time in pain and shame weak and hurt silencing fading away

One day it will end .....One day is all she needs

The end of innocence now over and gone she now struggles to be free

13. Shining Light Burning Bright

As the wind blows carelessly across the trees

The night sky burns bright with stars and ease

The moon shining fierce upon the land

Warm and beautiful it touches the sand

In the distance lovers sit upon the ground

Planning their future and holding each other

Not a care to be found

Laughing and planning all the things that awaits

Talking of their dreams and goals they have

Dreaming of all the kids they would make

Love is in the air but in the distance another fire grows strong

One of pain and shame yet pretending nothing is wrong

The wars and famine that plagues the earth

The children's hungry cries that are left unheard

The women and men fighting draining all that they have

Addiction running rampant creating a hated destructive path

There are different lights shining burning bright and fierce

Some filled with love and compassion

Others filled with fear

Despite it all we must all come to the conclusion that in the end

what matters is what did we do ? Did we keep fighting ? or did we just give in.

14. The Rage

Inside us all dwells a burning fire called rage

The flames sweltering to unforgiving heights dispensing its

internal hate

A rage so twisted and evil it must always be contained

For if let loose it will cause much chaos and pain

Breaking free the evil within bound by its chains

The fire within that is called rage can make a person or break them apart

Can kill another or break another's heart

Ravishing and feeding off the weak from the start

The rage within us all is a monster and thief of joy

Robbing us of happiness with its deadly evil and ploys

Taunting and teasing the very grips of reality we must fight to the end

As hard as it seems there is a way to battle and conquer the rage

To fight the beast we must let love in never giving up the fight we must guard and defend.

15. The End

One more punch thrown another nasty word has been said

Lying awake she cries bloody in her cold and loveless bed

Thinking of ways to get out of this hell

And restoring the emptiness of her soul that now inhabits a cold and void shell

Her skin crawls at his touch the smell of alcohol makes her sick

But at the end she complies to his demands and his evil fits

She cries she screams she just doesn't care anymore

Her heart cries out to let it end her mind a wreck shattered and torn

He lays in a stupor drunk upon the floor

Trying to remember what he did the night before

But the memories fade even though the bruises have not

He stumbles for another shot

Everyday his pain gets worse his joy stolen from youth

From the one man he trusted and loved never knowing the truth

Lies upon lies hurt upon hurt he now fuels the fire within by drinking his pain away

Not realizing that the pain he hides is being inflicted on another he vowed to love promising never to hurt harm or shame

The cycle must end but he is too weak to stop it now he is far too gone

She stumbles from her bed blurred vision from the swollen bruised eyes

Blood crusting over from her nose she now holds in her hands a loaded surprise

Unable to take the pain any longer she carefully aims and fires hitting him point blank in the head

Crying and tired of it all she must make a choice

Walking over to where he lays dead upon the floor she kneels beside him gun to her head

Forever silenced they both lay in blood for they are now both at their end.

16. Lust

Intertwined bodies burning with desire

Souls ablaze with passion flames of lust growing higher

The taste of lust upon their lips bodies shaking out of control

Hot and fervent two hearts burn the throws of lust binding their soul

Moaning with abandon grasping and holding on strong

With each kiss each touch the world melts away it is gone

Nothing matters in this moment of time

Nothing else matters but the meeting of bodies hearts and minds

The lust abound grows ever so fierce

As the end comes closer the climax is near

Lustful indulgence ecstasy all combined in one moment starting with a kiss

Thrust after thrust cries of pleasure and bliss

The meshing of bodies clinging breathless and wet

Until the next time that the feelings of lust begins all over again.

17. The blessed and the lost

In this world there are the blessed and the lost

People who thrive in life and those who struggle to survive at all cost

The strong and the weak the loved and the unloveable

The prosperous and the homeless that walks the earth unconsolable

The blessed walks around without a care in the world

While the lost ramble on in disorientation wondering how to live day to day in this cold cruel world

Hate separates the people causing wars famine and pain

Bringing out the worst by their exploiting others shame

Looking down their noses at what they do not understand

Looking at the lost with contempt never reaching out to lend a helping loving hand

But what the blessed don't see they fail to comprehend

Is the lost is strong in their survival their love and compassion never ends

For they know what it is to have very little in life

So they will keep going strong walking tall they will slowly thrive

Never questioning things that are left better undefined

Slowly the lost will reach their destination with ease

While the blessed and the prosperous slowly decline their privileges cease

Until the day we can become united as one

This world is doomed to misery like a yarn unspun

18. Never Again

Never again will he hurt her heart body and soul

Never again will he assert his twisted painful control

Never again will she lay down and beg

Never again will she cry silently in bed

Never again will his hands cause bruises and blood

Never will her tears begin to flood

For she has seen the worst and can now take no more

Vowing to leave as she lies still battered and bleeding upon the floor

What ever happened to the man she loved? Where did he go?

Why oh why must his love hurt ? She still does not know

At first his love was kind warm and gentle to the touch

But now with time his mere presence scares her all too much

Never again she vows she will pick herself up

Rising above the abuse she will grow strong she will stay tough

Fighting for her freedom is her ultimate goal

To break his chains of torture and tormented control

Not giving up she fights everyday and night

No longer giving into her shame her pain and her fright

Stronger and stronger she thinks of the day of escape

The tears she cries drying up she must find a way

Until that day that she can flee his abusive hell

She struggles to fight and recapture her long lost self

Never again will she endure this pain and false love

Never again will she tolerate his hate she vows this to above

Never again.

19. A Tale Of Love And A Twist Of Hate

Willows weeping against the wind blue skies lay above

It is here that lies within a tale of love and a twist of hate that only a cold heart could dream of

In the distance in the burning night sky scattered among are the stars shining its light

Under those stars cries two lost souls who vowed to end their life

For along the way they lost all hope as all the love they felt disappeared

Only to cross paths one last time to face the pain and their fears

Never knowing the truest love of all is the love they carry within themselves

Living so long in misery blinded by their own hell

She came from a broken home tossed back and forth like a pawn

He came from a home where he was alone from dusk to dawn

Never feeling the love of their families their paths of destruction were set

Fueling their inner demons with hate and disgust as they lie in their beds

They met each other years ago in a drunken one night stand

Bonded by a twisted broken love they thought they had

As time went by they grew in love and their bond was starting to bloom

There was only them for any other there was no room

He became her husband she became his wife

And as each day that went passing by they were finally happy in life

Until one day it all came crashing down when he left and never came back

For he had fallen in love with another leaving his wife all alone and sad

Never telling her the truth he just walked out the door

Leaving his wife begging and pleading for him to just talk once more

He left and never looked back his heart was no longer hers to have

For she had fallen victim to an accident that had left her scarred for more than he could understand

Years go by and they both moved on only to fall again

Into a deep abyss of self hatred and pain that they see no way to win

So one night they took a chance and went to their old picnic spot where they once made love under the stars

And that is where they sat until there was no more beating of their hearts.

20. Angels around us everyday

There are angels around us everyday guiding us through this hate filled world

They come in different forms in different ways and even through our dreams

They help shape us into someone better when nothing else is what it seems

Giving us strength and courage to thrive in this world that is filled with evil and pain

Easing our minds touched by abuse our hearts scarred with shame

Angels around us everyday shining their unseen light along the way

Paving a way for our growth driving the demons home to hell

Giving us hope for another day.

On cold nights when all seems lost and no one is around

Just lay yourself upon your bed cry out and you will be found

For they may be far away they can still hear us cry and pray

For angels are around us forever each and everyday.

21. Inner Demons Running Wild

Inside cries out in torment screaming agony and pain

As the inner demons running wild inside are causing chaos and decay

Voiding out all hope and love relishing in its destruction and hell

Until the body that it inhabits is merely nothing but an empty shell

A wasteland of once was a soul forever lost in its wake

Seething with anger and burning with inner fire

The body empty of love hope or even desire

No warmth no feeling are left they had all been burned by the wicked

The inner demons running wild inside had made their soul cold and sickened

Sickened with hatred sickened with impure thoughts and deeds

Never caring about another only caring about those that fits their evil needs

Everyday the inner demons run wild never letting go

And everyday the soul they inhabit they are forever losing control

Weakened by mistreatment wounded by abuse

All the fight within them gone they succumbed to evils use

Giving up the power over themselves for they no longer care

For they lived a life of heartache and pain that grew too much to bear

Mind breaking soul taking the inner demons took over the soul

Forever binding its time inside forever in control.

22. Another Day

Another day has arrived beautiful and new, the skies humming with birds chirping the clouds displayed across the horizon colored the lightest of blue

The people coming to and from work to home sometimes with lovers sometimes alone

Taking for granted that with each new day brings one more sad event an angry dispute or even heartache that seems to claim your heart body and soul

Another day of happiness joy and love

Another day of mixed contrasts of hatred and slum

Sometimes all combined is things only nightmares are made of

But in the end there is always one constant no matter what people believe

There is a place far beyond where there is no more hurt pain or hate

A place for us all if only one chooses to see

See the brighter and bigger picture beyond the pain and the shame

Look above it all let love in overshadowing all sadness and hate

Never give up for another day will be here

So cast away your doubts put aside all your fears

Live life to the fullest until it's time to go home

And never forget that even after you depart this world

You are never alone.

23. Two Hearts Beating As One

Two hearts beating as one skin to skin touch to touch

Bodies glistening with hot lustful desire

Souls coming together in loves passionate fire.

Climbing ever so higher the heights of their love

Daring not stop until their bodies entwined come undone

Love and lust ever so out of control

Two hearts beating as one ecstasy unbound flaming their souls

Daring to go even further thrust after thrust kiss after kiss

Sparing no moment in this time capturing each touch without miss

Longing and aching with anticipation two hearts beating as one

Closer and closer to the edge they reach together they come

Fires within dwindling to a dull roar as they lay entwined in each other's arms

Breathing lightly and lovingly taking in the silence that is the dark

Two hearts beating as one lying asleep in their bed

With the lasting memory of their love running through their head

Sleeping peacefully these two hearts beating as one

Sleeping and dreaming of the next glorious day to come.

24. The Hell Within

Deep in her soul there is a hell within

A battle she is losing a war that she cannot win

Torture and hatred and deep deep despair

Giving up hope she no longer cares

Rage and sadness plague her innards everyday

Growing fierce and strong making it hard for her to escape

Her heart cries out her mind screams with shame and torment

Her body weak from the ravishing thoughts that has become her mindset

Drowning in her own self hell too scared to cry for help

So she lays in her bed crying empty and void of love

She's just a nonexistent shell

Day to day the fight grows weaker and weaker

Hope of brighter days gone her life no longer her own

She dies a little inside waiting for it all to be over

Alone in her hell she drowns on the inner pain she holds in

Creating a prison of torture creating her own hell within

A hell she bears daily a hell she cannot win

25. Torment

Fire inside burning ever so higher

Tormenting the soul with unwavering desire

Longing for a touch that is no longer there

Yearning for the one and only to show how they care

But the torment inside pushes all away from her empty cold shell

Forever leaving her alone and miserable in her own sad hell

The scars of yesterday still haunt her today

The memories plague her mind making her slowly fade away

Walking endlessly amongst the world unseen

invisible to all around her she longs to be free

Free from the hurt free from the shame

Free from this life and its tormentor game

Until the day she forever closes her eyes

She will continue to walk aimlessly amongst the earth

Until her last heart beat dies.

26. In the still of the night

In the still of the night lays a crying child

A worried heart a man with no smile

A hungry dog begging for scraps to eat

A frightened woman pleading to not get beat

In the still of the night the darkness covers up the evil being done

silencing the screams and cries of those being done wrong

Burying in its night skies the secrets no one dares tell

Muffling the echos of souls lost due to the cold cruel hell

Never knowing from one day to the next if one will survive

If the next day that comes you wake up breathing, thinking feeling alive

In the blink of an eye it can all be taken away , a fading memory long forgotten

As in the still of the night your corpse lays rotten

In the still of the night.

27. Living in a cold cruel world

Death and destruction all around

Cold and dark evil unbound

Slashing and gnawing its way into this cold cruel world

Pain and disease everywhere in turmoil they are hurled

Love lost amongst the ashes left behind

No more homes are left for those in need to find

The hungry dismal and in despair eating from trash bins

Begging and pleading for help for someone to just let them in

Women and children abused living in a cold cruel world called home

Shut up away from the outside bruised and bloody they cry alone

Race wars starting riots in the streets

There is no winning there is no peace

Maybe just maybe one day it will all pass it may come to an end

But even now hope is dim for those living in this cold cruel world a reality that will not bend

Murder climbing higher and higher robbing and rapes and such

One day some how it will come undone it will be too much

And then the mighty hand of God will strike down his wrath his judgment of all his lost sheep

Taking the repented and humbled judging those he will keep

Until that day we all must choose

Do we want to win this war or should we give in and lose.

28. Monster Inside

Dwelling within is a monster inside

Ready to lash out aching to strike

Madness and turmoil within my soul

Heartache shame and pain within my mind i have lost all control

My blood runs cold with bittersweet memories long time gone

Plaguing my mind my heart nothing in me left that i own

The monster inside taking me apart piece by piece

Relentless and hungry it continues to feast

Leaving me an empty shell just walking aimlessly among the earth

Wondering at times what was the sense of my birth

Forever haunted by so many things that nobody understands

Alone I cope with the pain i hide and although broken I still stand

Never giving up never losing hope of a brighter day

Fighting the monster within harder in every way

I guess the lesson I have learned throughout the years

Is that one can become stronger despite all the pain and the tears

Holding onto hope letting your light shine bright

Learning to move forward keeping up the hard fight

One day when all is gone there will be no more pain

No more anger and no more shame

That is the day I can release the monster inside

Forever letting go of the things that i hide

29. Stranded

Stranded in the despair of the mind

Losing control running out of time

Knowing that once was is now gone

Forward she pushes striving to stay strong

Through the torment of her past

She keeps running far and running fast

Never remembering never looking back

Her burdens are hers to carry for she also did so much wrong

But through all the pain and heartache she has held her head high and strong

Never giving up always looking to a brighter day

Walking along the highways stranded she no longer stays

She cut her losses and moved from place to place

Never quitting never losing faith

That one day her time will come

Where she will no longer have to run

30. Every Touch

Every touch turns into pain

As every word spoken turns into shame

And as she lays upon the floor

She cries dreading as he walks through that door

Knowing that the pain will start again she hides away in fear

Trying her hardest to fight away the agonizing tears

She walks slowly cautiously looking around

Waiting for him to come home drunk waiting for the beat down

She wants to leave but knows if she does she cannot survive

As she has been without so much for so long no job no friends no signs of life

He controls her mind her heart her soul

Never will he let her go

What is the answer? what can she do?

To make it go away to hold her head up high to not be used

Weak and tired she wearily drifts off to sleep

Only to awaken to the thunder off in the distance hearing his voice yell deep

Shaking she goes to see what he wants afraid but strong

Trying so hard to show that there is nothing wrong

Every touch she endures brings forth more pain

Over and over her body bruised her heart aches

Wishing for it all to end so she doesn't have to feel anymore

No more pain shame and fear no more burdens to be bore

Slowly it ends her breath leaving her body ever so slow

As her memory fades as her spirit rises above and she goes

Looking down she sees his hands around her neck

Shaking and screaming but it's too late she is never coming back

31. Desire

Slow caresses bodies alive with desire

Kisses so sweet yet hot it sets the soul on fire

Bodies touching in the heat of the moment never letting go

Hearts bonded as one letting the passion flow

Thrust after thrust kiss after kiss

Moments of hot lust never being missed

Flames of desire growing ever so higher

Burning and yearning for more of love's fire

With each kiss and embrace they search each other

Learning and seeking and tasting making love last longer

32. Lost In Sorrow

Bound by chains her heart beats ever so fast

Running to escape the pain of her abusive past

Tears streaming down her face as she tries to find a place to hide

Looking for anyone that she can ask for help in getting by

Getting away from the horror of his large hands around her neck

Squeezing harder trying to take her very last breath

Lost in sorrow for what she has endured

But escaped with her life and a lesson learned

She knows now that not all is what it seems

Not everyone she meets is who they claim to be

But she is wiser now and closely guards her heart

No more will she allow herself to be torn apart

Stronger she will become determined to make it on her own

Even if it means surviving this hell on earth all alone

Her inner demons struggle to beat her down

Trying to tear the walls built tear them down to the ground

But in the end she will fight to keep from losing herself again

In the end she keeps up the fight to survive and to win.

33. Loved Again

For so long there was no love , nothing but pain and heartache

Nothing to give because all he did was torture and take

He took her soul her body and mind

Beaten her viciously time after time

Bloody and broken she rose from the ashes

To once again feel loved again

She fought the hard battle she never dreamed she could win

Clawed her way to the top and never gave up

Grew in her strength she finally stood tough

Through an uphill battle she stood victorious and true

Never looking back at the monster who caused her so much pain leaving her black and blue

She is loved again not by a man but by herself

Fixing the pain she carries putting out the flames of her inner hell

She survived and she is strong

She is alive and moving forward to a brighter day

No more love gone wrong.

34. Missing You

Day by day missing you grows stronger

The tears and pain seem to last even longer

Knowing I will never again hear your voice

Losing you was not my choice

God had a plan he saw that you were in pain

And that letting you stay would not have been a good thing

For your torment and hurt ran deep

So he placed his hand upon you for your eternal sleep

Missing you and your laughter the times I will cherish for life

The happiness you brought to those around you despite the pain you had thrived

You did not let your sickness get you down

Although it won its battle you did not let it kick you around

Your strength and your courage will be remembered forever

You are my best friend my brother and there will never be another you

This vow is swear is honest and true

You although gone will remain steadfast in my heart

Until my last breath and my soul departs.

I love you and miss you until we meet again

You're in my heart and mind always my dear best friend

35. When Strength Is Not Enough

Everyday the inner turmoil battles on unrelenting never giving up

Stronger the turmoil grows fighting against the inner strength now caving in

Inner strength is now not enough

The flames of self loathing burning the soul

Attacking the walls built up to prevent its ever growing control

Resistance is futile there is no sense in fighting for the body’s will is weak

Day after day withering away slowly dying unable to speak

Make the pain go away just take the pain away

Let this old broken body rest from the hurt and the shame

For all the strength inside of me is gone never again will I be the same

36. Sinners Touch

Heart to heart touch to touch

The heat of their lust burning out of control

Searching out their hungry sinful soul

Burning aching full of desire

Emotions growing ever so higher

Gasping breathlessly with each heated stroke

Grasping each other tight as their bodies burn out of control

Breathing heavily with the urge of hungry desire

The glistening sweat dripping down their bodies

Hearts beating faster setting their innards afire

With an unquenchable thirst a foreboding of fate

They give in to their lust in their unbridled state