Tired

Tired, honestly I could repeat this again, I'm tired

Tired of having to fake who I am

Tired of trying to please those who I have around

Tired of losing myself and talking about how everybody is fake

Tired of people saying how every friend they have is bad

And yet these people aren't nowhere close to being a saint

Tired of complaining without any action

Tired of bleeding on people who didn't hurt me

Tired of true friends leaving cause I stained them, bloodied

Tired of complaining to God for my problems

When He gave me solutions but I never used them

Tired of hearing the negative vibes

Tired of hearing the news and their lies

Tired of me feeling bad with my life

Tired of feeling working 24 hours isn't enough for the prize

Tired of opening this book called my life

Tired of closing it to not let the world inside

Tired of being afraid my personal space would get invaded

Tired of these thoughts crashing into my head, I'm infected

Tired of trying to man up and be strong

Tired of showing my weakness on the wall

Tired of painting my pain on mural

Tired of listening every sad lyrics in song

Tired, honestly, tired

Tired of posting sad post on my socials

Tired of expecting people to ask if am okay

Tired of people asking if I am okay

Tired of being overlooked in my friendship circle

Tired of trying to be loyal to my circle

Tired of thinking people can change

Tired of people thinking people can't change

Tired of writing this eulogy, knowing I would still go back to my broke down room

And yet still sleep with pains and fears as my sheets

Tired, I say it, I'm tired, at the point maybe I should retire

21 yet feeling like am 3 decades older

Tired of thinking that soon, all these would be over.

And yet doing nothing to change things, that's over