The Marvellous Magnificent Elphant Elafam!

Sir? Oh Sir, you cannot come in.

There’s simply no room, you’re elephantine.

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I am no ‘sir’, Sir, and you’ll mind your tone.

I’ve come for the show, and I will not postpone.

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Please! We’ll be squished! They seat only so many.

This tent will not take on your voluptuous belly.

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This is preposterous! Do you know who I am?

I’m the Marvellous Magnificent Elphant Elafam!

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That’s silly, that’s wrong, that just cannot be.

Cause that is the show we’ve all come here to see!

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Precisely, good Sir! Now please step a side.

The show must go on! And I am its pride.

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The Marvellous Magnificent Elphant Elafam…?

Not monkey, not donkey, not clown, and not… man?

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Nothing of the sort! You think man can do this?

Balance on peanut from trunk and then twist?!”

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Wow! It’s amazing! I had no idea!

How do you manage to poise tail over ear?!

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Your shock is correct, and you must not feel shame.

All those around will soon know my name!

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Indeed! ‘The Great Elphant Elafam,’ they will chant,

‘Is nothing less than a Marvellous and Magnificent Elephant!’