The dark places

I love you in the darkness of my mind,

I see you drifting by,

I see you hanging on to the light of me,

The pieces that you tore from me to comfort yourself,

Those pieces that made you feel comfortable enough to let me go

when all I wanted was your love.

You come back and you ask;

"What is it that has changed about you?" "You seem harder, less like that woman that I desired." Is your observation.

I don't cry when you leave that night.

I don't even make an attempt to ask you to stay.

I don't care that your face is filled with dismay as I allow you to walk away.

I want you, but I do not need you,

My heart runs cold.

I'm not sorry that I don't have any sadness to give you.

I think that maybe you're expecting me to cry.

I shrug it off and reach for my nightlight.

I turn it off and let the absence of your light comfort me.

Your light has left me ragged- you see? I don't think you do.

I realize as you depart from my driveway,

that you need me much more than I need you,

Because even as long as you have been upon this Earth you don't even understand. Yourself.

You need me.

A warrior Queen who will battle the depths of everything you used to be

pull up pieces of you that you would allow to decease,

from your limited point of view; you see no value in the shards

shards that came from the pressure of your past.

You need me to figure it out; create in you a new man.

But I have no desire to watch you leave AGAIN as you take the pieces- that I ran myself ragged to find- and feed without hesitation a different light.

I watch you leave.