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Sonnet of Scorn for Sewanee Squirrels

Hatred instilled at my alma mater, still harbored over a decade later

By D.K. ShepardPublished 2 months ago 1 min read
Top Story - February 2024
26
Sonnet of Scorn for Sewanee Squirrels
Photo by Aidan Kahng on Unsplash

Too many of them and not enough nuts,

scavenging trash cans, an apple core toss

sets them off, shooting out, rodent rockets,

into the street, almost hit, gets across.

Friends say they’re “cute”, dandelion fluff tails

and twitching whiskers, they forget those eyes,

beady black tar, soulless, prism light jails,

unblinking as they nibble on some prize.

I’m suspicious of them, the way they watch

from trees and their too close proximity,

lack of fear, won’t scamper off the sidewalk,

lurking around campus, furry armies,

their pelts blending with dull decaying leaves,

plotting against us, invaders and thieves.

***

Author’s Note - This was unearthed from my college days after reading the following pieces by the gifted writer and fellow squirrel hater, Rachel Deeming:

SonnetFor Fun
26

About the Creator

D.K. Shepard

Character Crafter, Witty Banter Enthusiast, World Builder, Unpublished novelist...for now

Fantasy is where I thrive, but I like to experiment with genres for my short stories. Currently employed as a teacher in Louisville.

dkshepard.com

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  3. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  1. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  2. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

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Comments (16)

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  • TheSpinstress22 days ago

    I am in shock to discover two of my favourite vocal writers are squirrel haters! I have never met anyone who hated squirrels and now there are two of you. I loved "dandelion fluff tails"...such a nice description considering you think they're evil and plotting against us. =D

  • olymoolla2 months ago

    Your stat is challenging your story is so beautiful you write like this you will be a great writer I wish and yes one more thing please open my vocal id and a story come later

  • Dana Crandell2 months ago

    But they taste like chicken. 🤣 We have 2 little wanut trees, so naturally, we have scores of these little sh*ts. After spending way too much time getting rid of one in our attic and dealing with the stress they create for our dogs, I'm considering putting squirrel on the menu. Love the term "light jails," by the way. Congratulations on Top Story!

  • "Rodent rockets" is a hilarious apt description of squirrels. Absolutely loved this and congrats on the Top Story!

  • Anna 2 months ago

    Congrats on Top Story!!

  • Test2 months ago

    Kudos for your effort! Keep up the exceptional work—congratulations!

  • Manisha Dhalani2 months ago

    Congrats on top story!

  • Rachel Deeming2 months ago

    I felt your pain. I saw this in my feed and must have got distracted from reading it at the time and in the sieve that is my brain, it leaked like so many other good intentions. Sorry, D.K. to be late to the party. But what a party it is! Like a post-Oscar event in the upper echelons of Top Story plaza. Squirrel haters unite! Great sonnet. And thank you for the "gifted" - right back at ya! And thank you for the two shout-outs. Much obliged.

  • Cathy holmes2 months ago

    Haha. That was great. I think they're cute, though.

  • Lacy Loar-Gruenler2 months ago

    D.K. I LOVE this! We deal with the little bastards and their rat buddies year-round in Florida, taking single bites out of mangos and oranges and finding ways into the attic from the roof to do more damage. You nailed it!!!

  • Villainous critters, according to this… I’ll have to take your word for it!

  • Hannah Moore2 months ago

    I was going to say you and Rachel need to compare notes here!

  • Gabriel Huizenga2 months ago

    What an excellent piece!! "...those eyes, beady black tar, soulless, prism light jails," is a brilliant line. Glad your college self could channel the squirrel-hate into such a great poem!

  • Ha Le Sa2 months ago

    Amazing poem!

  • Alex H Mittelman 2 months ago

    Fantastic poem! Great work!

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