Poets logo

Santa Claus Is Blitzed Tonight

Poetic song parody of Here Comes Santa Claus

By Jason APublished 2 months ago 1 min read
1

Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, drunk on cheap champagne.

Now he's stumblin' and bumblin' rolling down the lane.

Children singing while his head is ringing but he's feelin alright.

Now watch out when he drives his sleigh because Santa Claus is blitzed tonight.

Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, drunk on cheap champagne.

A half dozen glasses just went straight to his brain.

He needs some shades to cover his eyes those lights are too darn bright.

He'll crash into bed and bumpin' his head cause Santa Claus is drunk tonight.

Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, drunk on cheap champagne.

He could care less about brand names the juice hits ya just the same.

He knows a bucket of good strong coffee will get him ready for flight.

Now he'll fill up on a really dark roast so Santa Claus can come tonight!

Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus, drunk on cheap champagne.

He'll come around after he rebounds when it is Christmas morn again.

Yeah it's true he had a ball while as high as a kite.

But now he's ready for his gig because he's got toys to give tonight.

performance poetry
1

About the Creator

Jason A

Writer, photographer and graphic design enthusiast with a professional background in journalism, poetry, e-books, model photography, portrait photography, arts education and more.

Reader insights

Nice work

Very well written. Keep up the good work!

Top insight

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

Add your insights

Comments (1)

Sign in to comment
  • Mea Choabout a month ago

    This made me crack up! I get tipsy after the first glass of wine, so I can relate to a tipsy Santa Claus!

Find us on social media

Miscellaneous links

  • Explore
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Use
  • Support

© 2023 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.