Quiet time

Those l've loved, could say I talk too much. Only in hopes my honesty would build trust.

Even if it seems, looking back, I may have been talking to myself.

I didn't know I'd be tasked, in my overwhelming inferiority, with facing all I've spent my life working to extract.

At the speed of sound, the force of a million atomic bombs armed only with a single gun, loaded with lies rather than rounds.

Then I'd would be forced, or asked,or demanded not to.Understand where I am with memories that were less than sordid.As I was told they were always something else.While coming to accept breath.Realizing the hope for solace in anything less, would only open my eyes to the truth.In death, hell exists, and it is simply,an eternity of this.

I've been made the monster, who terrorizes with your gifted shame.Which, as your lover,I've shouldered and would have forever to lessen your pain.

All in the scope of the betrayal you've defined, that I wasn't aware of preceded.Forgiveness was offered, and once again, rejected.

If not for him, for silence.Whether "he" exists,misses all that this is.Neither excuses your absolute emotional absence, you'll own this, even if that is useless. I'd askif you've ever honestly loved.But your eternal fucking inaction, is answer enough.

As the moments passed,the wandering thoughts seem to disappear.In the darkness,one thing is perfectly clear.When my unconditional love was given to you, your selfish ways took my heart, my soul, my trauma,my fears,and nearly my breath.

Now I will give you, the only thing you and I have left.I present my silence,and had you not acted like it was there since we met, you'd have understood what this truly means.

Rather than creating a story that for the lies and deceit, you’d always have to feed.I've waited, looked, I hoped, and I finally am here to concede. To your labyrinth that you’ve made sure no one could beat.

If only there you could've had something else.Yeah, if only. I will suffer anything to make sure.I take from you the recklessly abused power of deciding for us both, when.Always was the only acceptable answer.