Not The Furniture Store

I never liked my name

I’m not sure if it’s the name itself,

or the way I sound saying it

But one thing I love is the way it looks in cursive

The way the capital “I” takes a different form

It transforms

Like how the blue summer sky becomes a black abyss at night

I like the way my name is short and sweet

Like Smurfs if they were real beings

My name is unforgettable

To be imprinted on minds and hearts forever

I often say, “My mother knew what she was doing when she named me” despite how ridiculous it sounded when she told me how she decided on it

“One day I was flipping through the Ikea catalog while pregnant with you and my water broke”

I thought it was ridiculous at first, like “Thank God it wasn’t Target!”

or that she had decided on Chinese food to satisfy a craving and had the menu in hand

But then, I began to view it differently

I thought, “That’s actually powerful”

Like I had chosen my own name

Like I had claimed my identity and demanded to make it known

So, there’s no one to blame for my having to endure the inevitable stupidity that comes along with a name like Ikea

Upon introduction, I waste no time beating you to the punch by saying “Yes, like the furniture store”

The yellow and blue logo match my aura but I am not the owner, just a supporter

Do not ask me if anything is on sale this week or if you can get a discount

Don’t ask me why your order hasn’t been delivered yet or why it takes so long

Don’t ask me why the furniture is so difficult to assemble

And don’t, DO NOT ask me if I’m Swedish

I remember my 7th grade math teacher

She called me “furniture store” the entire school year

And by then my skin was pretty thick so I took no offense nor was I embarrassed

I understood nicknames to be a form of endearment and accepted it as such

People often ask if my name means something

After several Google searches, it turns out the dyslexic founder created the acronym for coding purposes

So in other words, it’s meaningless

But I, personified, am meaningful

I am a force to be reckoned with

Like the ocean amid a storm

I am short and sweet and unforgettable like the letters of my name

I am to be imprinted on minds and hearts forever

I am furniture that was assembled piece by piece with an instruction manual that makes no sense

But, I still managed to put myself together

I still don’t have a blues clue as to how

I am the epitome of DIY

I am very reasonable and aesthetically pleasing

I am not for sale and my worth cannot be discounted

You can track me all day but there’s no telling when I’ll arrive

My name is not ordinary like an “Ashley” or a “Tiffany”

And no offense to Ashley and Tiffany,

But how many Ikea’s do you know?

My mother knew what she was doing when she named me

She prophetically chose my destiny

Now everyone will know that I was here

And you will never forget me