MI Querida Amor

If only you knew how much this hurts

Every second...

Minute...

Hour...

Everytime that needle clicks on the clock

I feel this pain

The pain of knowing that it's coming to an end

How much more will you make me wait before you either tell me you made a mistake,

Or the fact that all our time together was just you passing time till something better came along.

Now that you think you found what you looking for am I just gonna be thrown to the side for the forth time.

Will this time be permanent?

Or is it just you testing the ground before you eventually come back and tell me I'm it...

But not really meaning it...

When will this heart ache end?

When will this torment stop?

I feel like karma is getting be back for all the wrong I'm doing

But why does it have to be in this way?

Why take away the one thing I cherished the most?

The anchor that held me down,

The glue that held me together.

I can be my own glue , but with you it's so much easier.

I never wanted to go back to being numb and not caring,

But with the way things are going and the changes you are making, I can feel myself getting back to that point.

The point of no return.

Back to the emptiness.

When I'll utter a few words and know it's over

"Hello darkness my old friend."

I clench the barren Earth in my fist and watch it fall through like an hour glass. Dirt stains on my hands and soil in my finger nails, I lay on the ground as the rains come crashing down, "Beautiful" I mutter to myself, as the Spring monsoons drag in destructive winds and thunder I can't help but feel a sense of comfort, a feeling of home. As I lay up on this night and the windows crash with howling winds I am engulfed by the memories of you. Swaddled by your embrace I discovered my eternal bliss, intertwined with your soul I found the greatest pain. Mi querida amor... Your ebony eyes glow every time I look in them, like pyro maniacs into the heart of the flame you have hypnotized me with your gaze, the same gaze that has send many men over many moons to madness, but not I. Your vile charm is intoxicating and repulsive but as addictive as any man on a mission to find Valhalla.

MI querida amor... Your words can hurt me no more than the mighty Eagles success with catching its prey and for this I bestow my undying loyalty to thee, should you accept it.



M