Maybe this world is just too dense
Or maybe it's me
I was born on the coldest week of january
2 weeks late
I was supposed to be great
My akashic records just won't let me be
But i know deep down it's this current version of me who won't let me be
Her best self.
"You don't deserve it" some nasty voice says from within
It wants me to stay small, to keep my light dim
"You know how it goes..."
"Always a massive disappointment.."
Even when the most perfect person comes along...
I still find a way to sabotage it
I can't explain it
I'm far beyond sick and tired of it.
At this point, I don't even have words for it.
It is such a hideous destructive resistance
The ego
The ego only wants to stay alive
Not to thrive
Because thriving puts an ex on your back
And my akashic records...
My karmic ties
Always the same dreadful past life
Always the same old unchanged me in the mirror
But that was then and this is now
And yet, I struggle to receive
To take that leap of faith
Sometimes even to believe
To make my life the best possible life
In the here and now
I really wish i could have been that joan of arc figure
I really wish..
I wish i could run into battle with nothing but the faith of god
But even more so that I could open myself to pure love
To finallly just surrender
No expectations, no judgement
Just pure love
No mind to get in the way
No thoughts at all
Just me, you and love
Yeah that's all I ever wanted
And now without it
I'm so lost.
About the Creator
Mkat
...on the spiritual path...
om
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Silence
I don’t remember the day the world ended. But I do remember the day I noticed. That photo was it, but I did not know what it meant until I sat in my darkened bathroom, staring at the newly developed film. The street was neither empty, nor abandoned. It was dead. The colours of the flowers wrapped in that red ribbon caught my eye, and as I crouched to take that photo, I could hear only the lonely silence of a graveyard after dark.
By Alexander McEvoy6 days ago in Fiction
Comments (2)
The lines Always the same dreadful past life Always the same old unchanged me in the mirror. I liked the most
aww so sad. Resonating lines and true: The ego only wants to stay alive Not to thrive