Fallen One

In the final analysis, i am the worst

Plagued with a generation curse

We all know where the bad ones go

Down below

The poison's already been ingested

I've been tested

and came up short

No one lets down an angel and messes with the fates to wind up unscathed.

Words simply fail to describe her.

She's perfect, beautiful, divine and sublime

And every one of them fail her

Nonetheless she still sticks to her faith

She is beyond strong and brave

She has more love in her than there are water droplets in an infinite ocean.

She knows everything.

She looked into my heart which she once loved but now she turns away.

She is a warrior, a champion, an angel and saint.

I should have tried harder

I never could believe true love could be mine. The devil's been telling me that my whole life. That and many other awful things.

I should have accepted the greatest gift of eternity

The once in an eternity blessing.

St peter won't be calling my name

The biggest sinner is the almost saint

I nearly vomit and faint knowing what I've done.

It can't be undone.

You'd think I would have learned from the biggest baddies-- judas, lucifer and icarus

Only for me to become one of those monstrous men.

Indeed, how many turn away from a christmas miracle?

My heart is past the point of being froze. It simply is no more.

And my soul? I don't even want to know.

It is forlorn, scorned and damned.

My corpse has been ejected and left for scraps.

Oh this far more than a simple mishap!

I knew what was at stake

That there was no room for error

Or a moment to hesitate

As a result, this feeling of regret is something I can't shake.

I could only truly love and understand her by running into the unknown bliss

Nothing less would do.

I went thru 1 million boxing rounds just to not run across the finish line

I was the little minnow that fought a million currents and how many predators only to resist the kiss of true love and remain an ugly frog forever.

It could not be comprenhended by my mind

I should have leapt with my heart

To make her mine

She is all I've ever wanted

Our bond crossed all boundaries of space and time

And honey i know your light shone with the strength of a billion suns.

My time has come and went

All i can do is repent

All in vain.

The next time an angel comes near, i will be wise enough to listen, to obey and to appease her every whim which is a command from God's kingdom.

Ohh if I still had a heart, how much would it weep for you! How much it tremble at your glory! I would have waited for you forever to become braver, stronger, better for you...to be perfect like you... to just have one more shot at love...at eternity with you.

I know at one time I was a worthy potential lover. I hope you don't think it was a complete waste of time. I will always love you.

No more sad poems I promise.

I am sorry. I am sorry. I am sorry.

Ciao bella